The determination thoughts continue as I witnessed a man, I would say his age about 70, kind of frail, with a right arm braced so it would not flop, but it just hung down at his side, limp, like it was fake.

As I was biking at the gym today, he was directly in front of me- but across the room. Here he is, on a treadmill, going at a cautious speed, one arm able to give him support when needed, and he went on for 30 minutes. He never faltered, never slowed down, he just kept it up.

And I could tell it was not easy for him, but he did not flinch in pain, no … step after step he moved on that belt. What an inspiration.

Than I looked to my left. There was an older woman who had brought in a person who appeared to be mentally challenged. And this young woman was determined to pedal that bike and not stop. The older woman made sure she was seated on it properly and as the girl pedaled, she assisted her with the proper resistance and settings, and this young woman pedaled as if her life depended on it. With a smile so big one would think she was going for the gold medal and could see it in her sights.

I could almost see the wind blowing through her hair. She too was an inspiration to me.

Going to the gym is sometimes a challenge, but it feels good when I am done. Who knows where it will get me, but wherever it gets me is a better place .

I never feel judged there, I do my own thing, I never feel like I am in someone’s way.. I just am there, trying to be a better me.When I am through, the shower feels great as the hot water therapeutically drenches my body. Yes, it is a good feeling when it is the other end of the visit. I wonder if it feels that good to that man too. He seemed to be trying to recuperate from a stroke. Some would let that knock them down, but this guy… he was there for him. God bless him.  I am going to do a few things around the house tonight, and probably hit the hay early. Tomorrow is a busy Monday, I know it will be… So until later, stay safe. Love to all. Mrs Justa… alias Cindy

Determination…

have you ever been determined to face all odds and go for something, even though you know the mountain is high, the journey long, the challenge more than you have had for a very long time.

I am reminded of that watching poor Indi trying to walk on top of the snow. We all got hit BIG TIME again in the North East, and our side yard probably has 4 foot snow banks . It was the really wet, big flaked, good for snow man snow. The snow is too heavy to really clear the whole area we do for Indi, so we have an area like a corridor for him to scoot out, do his thing and scoot back in.

Last night it got cold enough so that first thing this morning Indi could actually walk on the top and not sink. But today has been in the 30s and Indi can not figure out why he is sinking with each step. It is so pathetic watching all four of his legs go out as he tries to belly scoot across the snow bank. He walks, scoots and sometimes dips …

and his front drops down as far as it can go.

I watch him and am inspired by his determination. Nothing is going to stop him from trying to stretch his area some. We got so much snow that the snow bank from the plow that is in our side yard next to the shed, now extends for about 10 feet into the driveway.

But it is closer to Spring… and the roads get wet pretty quickly, the days have more sunlight to them and the calendar is closer to March and further from October… and March leads to April, and April inspires rain to inspire the flowers. But today… today was an inspiration to see determination in the making.

I love this little guy… he is so full of life, and has the will to go to any level to get to where he wants to.

I do not know that I have the determination he has…

Do You???

Love to all… Mrs Justa… Cindy

As we were coming home tonight , in the blowing snow , over the drifted roads, Mark was talking about how neat it would be to have a car with heated seats. I had to laugh because I am not real fond of them.

There was this one cold winter evening when my boss had offered me a ride to meet up with Mark. She had a pretty neat car and I felt like I was riding pretty plush. We had gone down the road for maybe 7 miles and I was feeling a really weird sensation that was gradually becoming more disconcerting as the miles passed.  I was not sure what was wrong with me, but I hoped what ever it was , it stopped soon.

It felt like I had accidently sat in some sort of corrosive material. It was kinda scary and very internally embarrassing. I remember thinking to myself.. “Oh great, here you are in this nice car and there is something wrong with your butt.. “

As the minutes passed I started to try to levitate my butt of off the seat without her knowing I had any sort of a problem. Ya know.. kinda like the way you would have to hold your butt off a really skuzzy public toilet seat when you REALLY have to go.

So here I am, trying to separate my seat from the seat as she is barreling down the highway at 65-70 mph. My legs are not those of a weight lifter, so they were starting to tremble a little, and with any turn my knees started to feel like they were crunching ..oh yeah and the seat belt was fighting with me as I tried to get off the seat inconspicuously. It was so strange, and for a few minutes I thought about telling her I had something terrible wrong with my derriere….but I felt shy and embarrassed.Gees… she is my boss… and I felt awkward riding in this nice car…and here I am feeling like my entire seat is going to melt her seats. 

All of the sudden she said.. “if your seat gets too warm  , you can just turn it down with this adjuster”

Phew.. immediately I relaxed my trembling thighs, my knees slid back into their normal position and the seat belt stopped chomping on my shoulders,  my heart started to adjust to its normal rate as I realized it was a heated seat I was on.

So as Mark suggested heated seats my face lit up with a smile as my head shook from side to side. I was not impressed with the sensation… Just thought I would share this to anyone thinking about getting heated seats… and it you have heated seats, do you riders a favor and mention it to them right up front. Ha Ha.. did I feel silly.. Love to all, Cindy.. alias Mrs Justa… alias hot pants.

I was talking about yesterday and thinking quite often, that the memories behind me far outweigh the ones yet to come. As I was looking in the rear view mirror, down the road of life that has past….I was thinking about being in 5th grade and the feeling of insignificance, living in a world where significance was judged by the amount of money your family had, by how many friends you believed you had , how “in” your clothes were and how great your lunch was that your mom made for you.

Well I kinda struck out on every one of these items… hence the feeling of insignificance. Out of all these items I think the lunches were the top of the list to make me stand out in the crowd … and not in a “we want to be like her” way.

Let’s just say my mom took school lunches to a new height… well maybe an all time low. I am not blaming her, she was suddenly widowed at the age of 42, had 6 kids to care for, and no formal education. So she was in college, trying to keep us all together and not really having a lot coming in from Social Security she received after my dad died.

And I understand she did her best..this came clearer to me as I grew older…but as a ten year old, in “non cool” clothes, with few friends, poor, and …with brown sack lunches.. each day was let just say an adventure. Kids would watch me open it, not out of envy, but more amazement at her sense of creativity. Now mind you.. this was a brown paper bag, .. we did not have juice boxes, or little cute ice packs to keep the food cool… nope it was the temperature of the room by the time I got to open the surprise in the bag.

There are a few lunches that I can still see… one was a cottage cheese and grape jelly sandwich. Yeah that was a big attention getter. Fingers pointing to others at my sandwich as I unfolded the wax paper only to find the grape jelly had bled into the bread, the cottage cheese and luke warm … and it was a smell I can still smell 46 years later.

Than there was the time she decided to make a sandwich with TONS of margarine on the bread and sprinkled sugar between the bread. Yeah that was a hit too. AS I unfolded the waxed paper, sugar sprinkled on the table and the margarine was mushy… 

Oh and how about the American cheese and mustard sandwich on moldy bread… yeah.. that too is branded in my brain…

( And I wondered why no one wanted to come to my house!) As a matter of fact, no matter what the sandwich creation was, it started with hunks of margarine  on each slice. I think she felt it kept the sandwich inners from soaking in the bread. ( Nice theory but I can testify… not always worked out that way. )

She also had a knack to make toll house cookies.. her way. If there was anything she needed to finish up it either ended up in the toll house dough … or the spaghetti sauce. We had rice krispies, cheerios, flaked cereal, in the cookies. And to save money she would have one bag of choc chips to a quadruple batter. So the chips were more like a “Where’s Waldo” ( instead “Where the choc chip”)  game that a cookie filled with chips. They were good.. interesting..and ya just never knew what was inside. We had many good memories from childhood, and my mom would literally have given the shirt off her back if you needed it.. ( and put it in a sandwich …ha ha.. ) I miss her terribly… but I do not miss her lunches..

Love to all… and I love you mom to… as you watch over me from above… Mrs justa… alias Cindy

As we get older there becomes a place in our minds that is like a bank vault full of memories. And it seems like the memories will outweigh the ones yet to come.

There are so many times in life when things are just side splitting funny, and other times when things a frightening. But each time creates a memory. Whether we remember the memory is another thing, but it is there. And without even realizing it, it can pop out like it was yesterday that it happened. it is like a bright light pops on and shines thru the branches of life to remind you of a time gone by.

Today for some strange reason , as I was driving home, I found myself back in 10th grade. Winter break …. We had about 8 of us, guys and gals who just had fun together. Platonic fun. We wanted nothing but friendship from each of us, and it was good that way, because there was none of the pressure of couples.

We all decided to go bowling. The bowling alley was about 3 miles from our houses, but that was okay, we walked down to it. I remember Sparky, he ran the bowling center. Here we were , a winter afternoon, the 8 of us . There was some sort of special if we did the bowling for 3 games and renting shoes on afternoons. I remember I wore these stretch pants, they had these loops that went under the foot, kinda like these here.

Well stretch pants like these and me… lets just say it is not the best pair in the world. I was always pulling at the waist because my legs were longer than the pant leg and stir-rup hooky thing was designed for. Plus I always had what my mom referred to as thick thighs… ( later in life others referred to them as thunder thighs)

So here I am – the bowling alley had maybe 50 lanes, and we get lane 1 and 2. Sparky and his desk are at lane 30 area. We were laughing, and me.. … I was the jokester. Cracking jokes, being witty and trying to feel special I guess thru humor.

It was my turn, so I went up and over exaggerated my step and my throw and accidently stepped over the line into the lane. I was unaware until that time that when you cross that line you become air bound due to oil on the lane. Somehow the ball left my hands as I went up in flight, and me and my stirrup pants crashed to the lane, I did not bounce, and my pants did not stretch… are you getting the picture here? The stirrups held tight… so something had to give… the seam from the back to 1/3 of the way up the front blew apart. I had a tunic top on thankfully, because it covered my exposed butt. I sat there in the lane, legs spread and watched the ball make a strike !! I laughed hysterically and somehow jumped up, telling the gang I was getting a drink… I ran down to Sparky , shared my dilemma with him and he frantically gave me every little gold safety pin in his drawer, than I went in the bathroom and pinned this whole seam quickly… soda in hand… .I returned to be in time for my turn again… but it was very hard not to have any of those babies pop open while bowling and for the long walk home…

That is the last time I have worn Stirrup pants.. by the way…

It is funnier now that I am 40 years away from the event. And I wonder if any one of the people I was with.. if they knew what happened. I thought I had fooled them al… but now I wonder.

There was a lot of me showing when the stretch material decided to give way… 

The things we do .. the memories we have… and I am not sure what the heck made that bright light shine on this memory.. But it did make me laugh.. really hard…

Love to all, Mrs Justa… and the memories locked in my head…

Wow the weekend is over… bing bang boom.. over.. it was a good weekend, As I stated a couple days ago we got to spend time with Brandon on Friday, we did a lot on Saturday and today, well it was kinda busy too.

This morning I had to solo in church. It was neat, the pastor was a guest pastor. He actual is an “outdoor” pastor, who spends a lot of time sharing the gospel with people at outdoor events. I am really glad he brought it indoors today! AS we had temps in the LOW 30s… a little too cold for me to be belting out a song. I am really bugged cuz I took a lot of notes

and must have left them on the pew when I got my coat on. it was a very good sermon.

Than off to the gym for a bit and than this evening we got to spend time with both our kids and their spouses and their kids.. alias our grandkids.

This is the second time that Jeff and Amanda, and Josh and Adrianne have gotten together since they both have had their kids. So here are the cousins sitting together. It was so cute to watch them.

We went over for a couple hours after they had had their supper and it was nice to see how well they all get along and seem to connect.

Mark and I had worked very hard to have the kids feel like they were brother and sister when they were young,we wanted them to have each other as they became adults. There were some years when they were each very much involved in their own lives but they really never lost the bond they made as children. It was nice to sit back and observe… proud of who our children have become, proud of who they knew were their soul mates and mesmerized by our grandkids.

So this weekend was a good one.. leading into what may be a very busy week… it got me ready to go forward !. My love to all… Proud mama Mrs justa… alias Cindy

Today is Saturday and there are things we always do on Saturday. First thing in the morning we go out to breakfast with our friends, every Saturday we do this. To regroup and see how we survived the last week and to hear about our kids , our grandkids, our life. Than we leave there and go our separate ways. I always have my grocery list and Mark and I go and shop at Save A Lot first—cuz if we can get it there we “SAVE-A-LOT” and what we can not find there we head off to Wal Mart. We head home usually and my Saturday routine starts with house cleaning and changing the towels, sheet and just getting everything tidied up before the next week starts. I do not have to vacuum cuz Mark does that during the week a few times, which is nice… .

Occasionally there may be time for a gym jaunt, not always. But lugging around the cleaning stuff, cleaning from top to bottom has a lot of reaching, twisting, bending and scooting to the next room. With winter here, ya never can tell if there is also shoveling, snow blowing or roof raking to do, and in the warmer weather—well there is weeding, mowing, gardening.

I have said before and still say it that I really love all these things. I am half way thru the cleaning time- I just have to sweep and wash the kitchen, hallway and 2 bathroom floors and I have a couple loads of laundry to do.

As I clean it is funny because I have these memories, images in my mind of places I have lived in the past and how whomever ran the house cleaned them . My mom bless her resting soul was a clutter type person. I can remember when we would go and visit her she would have piles of papers on the dining room table, and she would move them strategically so we could sit with her and have a cup of tea and her famous toll house cookies. She loved when people came over, and never once apologized for her stacks of papers, or dust, or clutter… nope she just strategically moved what she needed to and we had a nice visit. This was how she was comfortable, and she knew it was kinda messy, but it was who she was. She loved people, and her priorities were not always making sure everything was cleaned.

I grew up in that sort of cluttered lifestyle, and even though I do save things, I believe the house is neat. it is too easy to set things down and not put them away, so I  do try to always put things back where I got them from. Mark is a neat person too, so it makes the process pretty easy. It always feels great when I am through. Fresh smell of the house, hint of lemon from the dusting pray, and the fresh smell of laundry. I love the cleaning part… but I love the finished time too. So off I go to check ion the laundry, and sweep the floors and get them washed, check on the crock pot chicken soup… smells really good… and than we will chill and watch a movie.

Life is good in Fulton NY … I hope it is for you too… Love to all, Cindy… alias Mrs justa

We were at Brandon’s tonight from 5:15  till about 9:40. We had a ball with him. He is so much fun to be around, I can see why Jeff and Amanda hate missing even a minute with him. They went out to dinner with friends and we we blessed with these few hours.

He has a recliner that fits little people his size, and there was a show on at 6:30 that he is mesmerized by. All the rest of the time the TV is off and he is playing with his toys or walking around making noises. He is so funny.

I got to do bath time tonight and he was laughing pretty hard as he played with the cars and I was making them jump off the side of the tub into the water.

I treasure each and every moment I get with him, as I know this moment , each moment is a once in a lifetime experience.

It is so cool to see when kids understand what you are saying. When you tell them to find something or do something and they do it. it is a God Given WOW moment.

The grandkids have a way to our hearts that make us smile no matter how we are truly feeling. Negativity in life is not welcome when we are with the grandkids. It is sunshine, and flowers to me.

He plays hide and seek… he has the cutest chuckle, and he is going going going till it is time to call it a night.

I knew tonight when it was time to go to the bath- his mom and dad said bedtime at 7:30 to 8… so I was watching him after 7 to see when I picked up on that one signal showing he was tired. I was watching for the quick eye rub, or pulling on his ear… but he made it quite clear when all of the sudden …he just stopped in his tracks.

So off to his bath, rock and read stories, and tuck him into bed… not a peep from him… He was pooped.

So tonight… I think we both are reminded once again how blessed life can be. This weekend Adrianne and Josh are coming up to visit Jeff and Amanda… so we get a double dose of grandkids on Sunday when we go over and say hello…

OHHH I can’t wait…. Thanks God for grandkids… Love to all, Mrs Justa… Alias Cindy

Sunday I am singing in church. It has been months since I was able to sing, as I fought with bronchitis and sinus infections and than strep throat since Thanksgiving. So this past week and a half I have finally been able to carry the notes for an entire song. We have a guest pastor there this Sunday, so I really did not want to just go to church Sunday with my head down low , being sick again. I think I will be okay.

Now what I do to really work my voice is my car becomes my studio for practicing. Since I have about a 35 minute drive each away, it provides me a place to practice new songs, really screw them up and eventually get them to a point that I practice them at home.
It also gives me a time to sing songs I know, which is what I have been doing this week. Well there is this one song  “On My Knees” ( it is a song about praying !!) and it is a pretty dramatic song. Well today on my way in, I actually gave myself goose bumps when I sang it. I thought that to be weird. I try to feel each song I do, so that others can feel it too.. but this was a first.

I must look really funny to those scooting down the expressway next to me… sometimes I am really belting it out .. Hee Hee Hee

Singing makes me whole…

I practice both songs for church and songs that are country or 70’ adult pop contemporary. Love “You’ve Got A Friend” it is such a cool song. No matter where I am … just call and I will come running. How neat to have a friend like that.

I have a friend like that, a few of them actually. And I have never abused the knowledge that with one call of their name they would be here, but it is like that warm comforter on a cold winter night. I also love the song  “ Wind Beneath My Wings” that is another WOW song… “Did you ever know that you are my hero… “ Ahh, I love songs with meaning… I wish you all a peaceful night, and hope that not one song gets stuck in your head… but that many do. Like an invisible IPOD… Peace to all… Until later.. “You just call out my name… and you know wherever I am… “ LA LA LA.   Mrs justa… alias Cindy

Well another year has passed and we made it through the dreaded evening at the accountants, I HATE TAX TIME! Like the accountant.. just hate taxes…

I have no idea why I hate it.. but it is stressful. I do not know why it is that way for me, maybe because I never know if the laws have changed, or if the government has raised the taxes without payroll keeping up with the changes….

I never know if the extra I have taken out every year from my pay will make us be okay or not. I get 35.00 extra taken out every paycheck to cover our butts. I hate the thought of owing taxes at tax time. I want to have extra taken out, so in my warped mind I feel like I am getting a gift from the government. I totally ignore the fact of how much is taken out of my check every week at tax time, and I change my mind to fake out my mind, and look at it like a bonus.

I get nervous at tax time and this cartoon from “22dollars.com” illustrates how I feel the weeks leading to the dreaded appointment.

We do not have many deductions, we have no dependent children, we have a mortgage and interest on it, and taxes for the land we live on. A few things here and there, and our tithing and contributing to various charities, we are glad we made it though another year. We are going to get a little bit back from state, so I am happy… but we owe the feds grrrrr…

I was thinking about taxes and everyone’s different theories of how to manage money through the year. Many economists state you want to get nothing back, other like the imaginary feeling of a bonus. Hey, what ever floats your boat.. me I go for the bonus pretending…

As we get home and turn on the radio- we hear on the news that the Governor may choose to hold the refunds till June. Boy wouldn’t that be our luck.. ahh but what can ya do… life is what it is at times, we have no control over government. Only on how we react to what government does.

Unless you want to be in the Obama cabinet- you need to pay your taxes. LOL. and yes we could do it ourselves, but we tried to a few years ago, I feel more comfortable going to our accountant. He has been in business for years, he is honest and gives us educated answers. It is important to have someone do the taxes that can be trusted. I have no idea the training the places in the stores have, but I know we can trust the accountant. I am thankful we are on the other side of the appointment, and we have another 11 months before I go through this anxiety again. And in the long run I am glad I live in America, we are truly blessed in this country, and the country needs taxes to run.,… so I guess I feel like we did our fair share… now I just want the government to be as frugal as we try to be . HA HA HA … now that is not going to happen !!!

Good Luck to everyone on tax time… I wonder if I am the only person who hates it ? Love to all, Mrs. justa…

Inventions, can you imagine being around when there were big inventions?

Now we get inventions of that are not that incredible.

But imagine how it was when they discovered electricity. Really… from a time of candles, lanterns, oil burners… and all of the sudden light bulbs.

It was probably something money had to buy, something that the more wealthy would get first.

But the thrill of having electricity. I can imagine how envious people must have been of the people with electricity.

I have a very good friend who does not like to come out where we live just because there are not street lights out here. I wonder how she would have felt in the old days of no electricity. Kinda like having your first flush toilet… imagine that happy day at the persons house. Or your first refrigerator, first washing machine, first mattress…..…

When I was very young there was Black and white TV, but not color. I don’t remember watching TV till I was 5. TV was a luxury. TV was also something that did not always come in clearly, we had to have rabbit ears on it and jiggle them around to get the channel to come in clearer. Changing to a color TV was like a different world.

So we went from this                                                                          to this now                   

So tonight I am thinking about how thankful I am for people with a vision, people with imagination and determination to create something and accept failure along the way.

This was inspired after a morning of no computers at work and we wrote things as the computers were archiving. It made me think back to simpler times, ledgers hand written for doctor appointments, and cash registers that took money only

… no credit cards…. Life was simpler back than, and for a little while this morning we had a taste of a more manual life. Have a great evening…

Love to all, Mrs justa….

Dinner time.

.What does this mean to you? As Mark and I were having dinner tonight I began to think back to the years of yesterday. Growing up , dinner time was a time for the family to be together. When we were kids we either left for school or in the summertime we flew out the door in the morning and returned only for a quick lunch or to get a drink, get a “boo-boo” taken care of,  or go to the bathroom. Other than that we played with our friends. We all knew that around 5 each night, dinnertime was upon us. Some moms had cow bells- and they would open the door and ring this loud cow bell, the kids would run home. My house- we were not blessed with a cow bell- nope my mom would open the door and scream our names if she could not see us in the near vicinity.

We would scurry home, all wanting to be the first at the table, wash our hands and push to get to our spots at the table and we would all talk at once, sometimes being correct for talking while eating, but it kept us together, grounded. It was a special, it was comforting like cuddling on a parents lap.

As I grew into my teens, the dinner time was the last place many of my friends wanted to be, but I looked forward to it. I loved listening to the kids stories from the day and looking at the excitement in their eyes.

As I grew older there were times in my life when dinner was a quick grab something and run to the next venture. But I missed dinnertimes around the table. Once I was married, dinner time was once again a sacred time. No matter how late my husband got home from work, I simmered things and waited for his return, than we would sit down and have dinner together.

Becoming a single mom , after my divorce, dinnertime was alive and well for a few years, until I started nursing school and had to work evenings. Than dinner time on Monday thru Weds was not with me and my son, it was my son with his grandmother and aunt. Thursday nights though I refused to work, and Jeff and I had a special dinner time for us to review the whole weeks worth of papers from school and talk of things that had happened. Weekends we shared dinner time together.

Once out of nursing school, dinnertime once again became an everyday occasion. I looked forward to it, and I remember as Jeff got older the loss I felt when he was no longer at the table. When Mark was still driving, eating dinner alone at the table had a void, it was like going into a sad place every night, like calling hours feeling. Oh I know kids grow up, and I loved seeing Jeff grow up, but I missed dinnertime with him.

What is great though, is he and Amanda have dinners together, at the table, with Brandon. It is special to them too. And Mark and I share dinnertime, we have all kinds of conversations. I think the Josh and Adrianne also try to have dinner together.

It is a time to solidify the foundation of our crazy lives and to reconnect with those you love. For many it is a  time to quietly thank God for the blessings in their  life, for the food on the table, for those we care for and those who care for us.

Let the journey of life never stop you from sharing a little time each day around the dinner table with your family, with friends, with someone you care about. Not on TV trays around a TV, not laid on plates in the kitchen for people to pick their food when time seems best for their own life… no it is for time together. No phone disturbances, no reading, TVs off,

no texting others, just total focus on those around the table with you.

It will be the most regarding hour of your day… Love to all, Mrs. Justa….Cindy

I ran across this Valentine’s Story that is told so children can understand the origination of Valentines Day tradition of giving Valentine Cards to one another.

I thought it was neat.. So I am sharing it –on this day before Valentines Day…

St. Valentine’s Story

“Let me introduce myself. My name is Valentine. I lived in Rome during the third century. That was long, long ago! At that time, Rome was ruled by an emperor named Claudius. I didn’t like Emperor Claudius, and I wasn’t the only one! A lot of people shared my feelings.

Claudius wanted to have a big army. He expected men to volunteer to join. Many men just did not want to fight in wars. They did not want to leave their wives and families. As you might have guessed, not many men signed up. This made Claudius furious. So what happened? He had a crazy idea. He thought that if men were not married, they would not mind joining the army. So Claudius decided not to allow any more marriages. Young people thought his new law was cruel. I thought it was preposterous! I certainly wasn’t going to support that law!

Did I mention that I was a priest? One of my favorite activities was to marry couples. Even after Emperor Claudius passed his law, I kept on performing marriage ceremonies — secretly, of course. It was really quite exciting. Imagine a small candlelit room with only the bride and groom and myself. We would whisper the words of the ceremony, listening all the while for the steps of soldiers.

One night, we did hear footsteps. It was scary! Thank goodness the couple I was marrying escaped in time. I wa

s caught. (Not quite as light on my feet as I used to be, I guess.) I was thrown in jail and told that my punishment was death.

I tried to stay cheerful. And do you know what? Wonderful things happened. Many young people came to the jail to visit me. They threw flowers and notes up to my window. They wanted me to know that they, too, believed in love.

One of these young people was the daughter of the prison guard. Her father allowed her to visit me in the cell. Sometimes we would sit and talk for hours. She helped me to keep my spirits up. She agreed that I did the right thing by ignoring the Emperor and going ahead with the secret marriages. On the day I was to die, I left my friend a little note thanking her for her friendship and loyalty. I signed it, "Love from your Valentine."

I believe that note started the custom of exchanging love messages on Valentine’s Day. It was written on the day I died, February 14, 269 A.D. Now, every year on this day, people remember. But most importantly, they think about love and friendship. And when they think of Emperor Claudius, they remember how he tried to stand in the way of love, and they laugh — because they know that love can’t be beaten! “

Happy Valentine’s Day to everyone.

( This photo is from last year- Jeff and Amanda moved in on Valentines Day, and he had this in their new kitchen for her…. )

I thought it was so neat- with all their frustrations of moving, and all the work that had gone in the previous months to gut and redo mush of this house…

I was touched by this special symbol of his love for her on Valentine’s Day

Love to all, Mrs Justa… alias Cindy

Some people seem like they can not get a break.

Like this cartoon I got off of Google images…

I know a person who seems to always seems to get knocked down 2 pegs for every peg she climbs on the ladder of life. I am amazed that she can smile through the pain. We are very tough people, we are. When we look back at life’s hard bumps- we can probably all see a time or two- or 10 or 20 !! times when we have been kicked in the teeth and struggle to get back up.. stronger from what we have been through and looking back in the rear view mirror of my life… I know at least for me- I can see myself in the midst of the crisis- feeling like I was drowning in despair, maybe fear, heartache, troubles… than I can see myself as time starts to fill the gap between the lowest point and the time of feeling like the worse was over… but this person.. I do not see she has much time between blows!

Geesie- peegie- Georgie—as my Mom used to say… I admire her spirit, I pray her life will smooth out and she can feel room to breathe, and until that happens- well I pray she keeps the strength to fight the adversities.

For any of you suffering , I pray for your healing. And for this special person in my mind—I hope everyone takes time to pray for her.

God will know who I am referring to, just say a prayer for her..

Love to all, Mrs justa… alias Cindy

This is from last January—so do not panic-it is not like this today…  but the photo was good for my wandering thoughts tonight.

I do not know about you, but for me

when winter hits, I find myself in self survival mode. It is a simpler life, shovel, snow blow, go back and forth to work and bundle up under a fleece blanket till my head does the bobbing doll routine around 9-10.

It is a time when my hands and feet warm up to maybe negative 10 degrees all season, and my heels and fingers battle the painful cracking of the skin.

Basically it is a time that makes me really LOVE Spring.

Mark always teases that we so should retire  in a warmer area, hey maybe by than we can. But right now… I love .. I absolutely LOVE my job, I have great friends many I had meant through work, we have family up here and I just have no desire at this point in my life to head anywhere away from them.

I just bought this heel crack cream that is supposed to be a miracle worker… I hope so !. I did venture out to the gym tonight and did my treadmill routine as I watched “All In The Family “ and an old “Greys Anatomy” it was fun , I really love going to the gym. What I don’t love is coming out of the gym and having the temperature outside in the 20s. BRRRR.

I have always been this way in the winter, I get cold easy and warm up slow. Now that I am ancient- I do go through a menopausal heat wave briefly at 2:30 AM – so I stretch over and turn on the fan. Hee hee- Mark refers to it as the “wind tunnel”- but at 2:30 or 3 each morning it feels like my bones are hot metal rods- and like my blood is bubbling- I HAVE TO HAVE THE FAN!. Than around 5AM- I am back to frozen again- fan off,, hit snooze a few times to warm up my body with the electric matress pad… I must drive Mark nuts !!!! Isn’t aging fun?? Anyone out there able to relate to the night bone / blood cooking??  Sometimes I think the guys got it made !!.

AS I listen to the scanner- the New York Thruway is doing their roll call- everywhere is “clear” in the 20s-30s, it is 9PM… this is telling me we are definitively heading towards Spring now! And I noticed at Walmart –in the outdoor area where they put all the neat garden / lawn stuff..they have about 4 tractor trailer containers parked there- I bet there are lawn mowers, bikes, mulch and all that fun outdoor stuff in them.. just waiting.

Can’t wait !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Love to all.. Cindy  alias Mrs justa.

On my way into work today I saw a couple of kids waiting for the bus, their back packs on their backs and a musical instrument in their hands. one looked like it might have been a trumpet and another maybe a flute. This made my mind whirl back to my youthful days. Ah yes, at 5 yrs old I started to play a musical instrument… and accordion!

it was not an instrument to carry to school, actually not an instrument to carry anywhere too far.

No this sucker weighed about 25 pounds at least. By the time I was 8 I was finally able to lift/drag it a little. When I was 5 the accordion teacher had a beginner one I was able to learn on, but as I hit 8- well I went to the big one. This had been my older sisters accordion, and I am not sure where it came from before her.

This is a photo of the teacher I had for many years- Frank Mucedola- he was good, and patient, and he would laugh at me when I tried to lug the accordion up his flight of about 30 stairs. He had a shop on the second floor on Genesee Street in Auburn. It was a different instrument for a child to play. No one I knew played one. I learned later in life that as I grew boobs- the accordion was not the instrument of choice. ( Need I say more !!)

I do remember this accordion I had had a chord button that would stick down if it was pushed accidently. And the only way to free it was with a pin- something pointed. Well I had committed to playing a song I had written for my girl scout troops variety show..,the families were invited—( I had titled it “Sam at The Pond”- it was about a frog in a pond… ) and I had taught my young sisters and brothers how to sing the song and they were there to perform it with me.

Well just before we were due to go on, the button got pushed in on the accordion and it stuck… . With it stuck in – every time the bellows were opened or closed it played a really loud chord sound that sounded like a tug boat.

I had a kilt on and my mom looked at the pin holding my kilt together and asked for the pin. I gave my mom the kilt pin to free the button. As she was working on it I knew the audience was waiting for our debut.. so I flew to the curtain of the stage to tell the audience we would be delayed a bit, but it would be quick. Well my kilt pin was not on my kilt… ( ya getting the visual here????) So there I am- 13 years old, whipping open the curtains of the stage and the audience roared with

laughter- I did not know why…until I looked down to see my flung open skirt and lets just say nothing left for the imagination of the audience. I am not sure how I composed myself to still return and perform the song… but I did…I wonder who remembers this unintentional show I put on that evening… hee hee- it was totally embarrassing for me !.

So as I looked at these kids today, I wondered about what possessed my parents to want me to play the accordion… other than so 40 yrs later- I still can laugh to my self over this incredibly embarrassing moment in my life!.

Love to all,Mrs justa…

Some things are not as they seem… have you ever run into that? I am sure you have. I had a day that reminded me that nothing is as it seems. So than I began to think about this rather memorable time in my past, years ago… many years ago.

Let me set the stage for you. I was married to my first husband, we did not have much money at all. We lived on 106 acres in the southern tier, land he had purchased before he and I had gotten married, he had bought it for a pretty good price. We were living at a home he was building as the money allowed. He did all the construction, so if he could afford wall board , insulation or what ever, he bought what he could afford and we whittled thru the supplies.

We had tons of things to do on this house. I wanted to lose weight and I showed him a sauna suit. It looked like this .. I saw it on an info-mercial and was convinced with all the building I was helping on while he was at work, heck I could lose a ton of weight while I was doing joint compound, clearing up and organizing messes after working for an evening. I called the 800 number and ordered this suit.  it was one of those 9.95 deals and promises of miracles. 4  weeks ;later it came…the next day Walt took off for work and I chose to don this space looking suit. I was convinced that I was going to leave it on for the entire day and had images of me being thin and trim within a matter of days.

So here I was …. 2 hrs now in the suit… and feeling kinda warm to say the least. I was determined not to take it off. After a few more hrs I was feeling sweat running down my body – kinda gross feeling, but I was envisioning taking this suit off latter that day and having no flab. The day continued to create sweat, and I was beginning to feel desperate for a breeze in the sauna suit, just a little breeze.

So I got this ingenious idea to got to the air compressor and just stick the nozzle up the cuff of the pant leg. See the legs, sleeves, all are tight with elastic at the ends to keep your body heat in it.

Click.. I am feeling like I am going to faint from the sauna affect and looking forward to the air…

I crank on the compressor, 

finally the compressor clicked off.. charged up, I put

nozzle in the pant leg at my ankle… squeezed the nozzle… can I say

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

– … the air took the sweat beads and was blowing them around..

AHHHHH-

I briefly noticed for a quick 2 maybe 3 seconds that I looked like the Michelin man….

I remember thinking and feeling pretty darn proud of this idea..

and than…

BANG

my suit blew up

yep exploded- blew the seams out of the pants and the arm seams.

Some things are not as they seem

When Walt got home that night  he noticed I was acting weird… so I finally did share my adventure…

and we both just laughed… Some things are not as they seem… Be safe, Mrs Justa…

What do you see when you look at these photos?

What is it that seems to stand out?

To me… I see a man with a  pride for America.

I see a man who gave his best to America…and not always liked, but I truly believe he loved this country..

And now I want to share a few other photos…

                                                                    And I simply ask you

What do you see in these photos?

Hmmm I say nothing more.

just HMMMM

A picture is worth a thousand words…

or maybe trillions of words for this administration…

As my beloved husband would say…

“ I’m Justa-saying”

God Bless America….

Love to all, Mrs Justa

As you look back over your life what testament can you make? What one thing could you stand up proudly and say about your life or a choice you made? If you were sitting on a bench and looking at this endless sky, reflecting on your life.. what could you say?

I ask this after being at the doctors office this week- ( I went to 4 different appnts this week- this was my Thurs morning eye appnt) I was sitting in the waiting room and there was a lady I think she may have been in her 70s in an area behind the waiting room.  The nurse was in her mid 20s. This sweet little lady was telling the nurse.. “ I never have owned a car .. not once in my whole life.” The nurse seemed amazed by this statement out of the clear blue. ( heck I was too !) Than this lady continued .. “ Nope never had a car, never owned one.. not one. I have taken a taxi though many times. It takes a  lot of taxi fees to equal the cost for a car each month. And with a taxi, I get left off right at the front door, it makes me feel like I am someone special when I get left right at the door. “

As I  sat there I drifted off into many thoughts. First the thought of never having a car, no worry of auto insurance, no maintenance fees, no loans, no paying for parking, heck if you really needed a car you could rent one, but if you lived in a place where public transportation and taxis filled your needs… wow .. how much money would have been saved in all these years of my life ?

Than I started to think about her comment of getting dropped off at the door. Damn… she is right!. In this area we live, I have seen often some people take taxis to Walmart and to the grocery stores, and as I am trudging thru the slush or the snow… I have to walk around the taxis leaving these people off right at the front door. She had a point there too. This lady did not say this out of self pity… no she said it out of pride.

So than I asked myself- what one thing can I say proudly of my whole adult life. Something I stuck too, something that never changed. I am embarrassed to say- I can not think of one thing. There are segments of my life when I have been able to say I stood for something, or proudly did something… but for my whole entire adult life…. nope-

And there she was, so innocently and proudly making that statement. I wanted to peak around the corner and see the look in her eyes as she spoke these words, for I only saw the back of her head. I wanted to see if she showed the pride in her eyes that I heard in her voice. A simple woman with a simple way to life.

God Bless her… God Bless you too. Love Mrs Justa.

God is not a puppet master who pulls our strings so we will do what He wants us to do. He loves us so much that He gave us free-will. this is from a web site ….http://www.turnbacktogod.com/

I went to this site today as I go back and forth through my mind of trying to balance the belief I have in God and the folks who want proof a God exists. I look out my window at all that can be seen… , I reflect on my life, I look at a baby, a flower, a bird, I listen to a voice sing a beautiful song, or a prophet speak of the wonders of life, I go back through pain and loss I have been through and when I felt I could not get up by myself… there was God holding me. 

To me I find so much wonder in life, there are heartaches and joys. And I truly believe that when we are suffering, God is suffering with us.

I no more will deny the existence of God anymore than the folks who question God being real will accept that God exists.

I heard something a few weeks back that kinda stuck in my mind. It was about why people do or do not go to church. When people say they do not like something about church… too much praying… too much music… maybe the preacher does not dress the way you think they should…maybe a person walks out of church and says “I did not get anything from that service”… when this happens we have lost focus on the reason for going to church. We are not going to church to be the audience…God is the audience. We go to church to come together with other people to worship God. That was a wow moment for me, because I sometimes sing in church and it is tough to get up there and hope that I chose a song that everyone .. all ages and generations can connect to.. a song that everyone will like… but I found this statement about God being the audience telling me I was losing focus on why I was there. I am there to worship God with others, and it is God I am singing for. God gave me an ability to sing..I am not a star, never claimed to be one, but I can contribute a song to the worship service every few months.

People turn their backs on God, they do not pray, they do not show their belief… and than they blame God for not being there for them. I read folks comments on line as they  state that God must not be a loving God because of people suffering from hunger, from natural disasters. But I truly believe that we are not puppets, we are free willed people, this free will opens doors for us to each make decisions that are good or bad. Sometimes our decisions spill over into others lives. And when that happens-   I think that God is feeling our pain too. There are choices that people have made that have caused us to be in situations we are in. People die horrible deaths… and when they do.. I believe God is there to pick them up and hold them. For us who are left living, who have to endure the pain of losing a person…I believe that God is also there to hold us if we do not turn our backs on him .

I wish you peace… Love Mrs justa.. alias Cindy. (Images from Googleimages)