March 2010


Okay, sometimes something stands out above the rest. Zooms right to the top of my mind. And tonight it was no exception. I have no choice but stand at the podium for a moment or two….

I had gone to Wal-Mart on my way home to pick up a box of Wheaties ( “the breakfast of Champions”) and a 12 inch turkey/black forest ham sub on wheat from Subway to share with Mark for dinner. ( Ummm.. is that good and only 310 calories!)

I am scooting in and out as quickly as an old lady like me can scoot and on my way out I am following a Currier and Ives type moment- yes…At first- for a quick moment – for a very quick moment- I had a warm cozy feeling- like a Hallmark moment-a grandkids with their grandmother type  moment.She had a cart,it looked like maybe they did some special Easter shopping…. there were two children- one looked to be around 3 in the cart and the other maybe around 6.  I was smiling at the site…. Than BOOM I was stopped in my tracks by this woman’s rather stern loud voice.  She opened her mouth- she said to these 2 adorable children “ Where the Hell did grandma park her car?” “ Do you see my Damn Car?”

Well that threw me into a a tailspin into my memories of being young , like these 2 children. If I ever heard my mom say Damn or Hell- it was out of the ordinary,it meant we had pushed ALLLL her buttons….  she was pretty angry about something and we had better click our heels and start doing something to please her.

This lady did not stop there.. oh no.. she found it necessary to ask the one walking why she was “dragging her dam_ feet. “ and “What the H_ _ l is wrong with you"?”  They got close to the car and out comes a person who appears to be maybe the mom- the grandmother said to the mother appearing woman “ Put her in the fu_ _ _ ng car while I put this S_ _ t in the back!”  

No “honey’s’ or “sweethearts” coming from this ladies mouth. And the amazing thing is this did not phase the kids….

Now this really was beyond annoying to me—first of all, what are these people thinking.. and why do they feel the need to add this language to every one of  their sentences? I have found that the English language works very well on it’s own without these curse words thrown in.  Swearing is not part of the common language, and if we bring our kids up to think it is.. well do not be surprised when the teacher is calling you because little Mary asked the teacher “Why the “H- – l do we have to do this homework?”  “ Or  “I hate going to D_ _ m gym class” 

What will they say at a job interview and think it is okay?

The English language can be spoken with beautiful adjectives, ones that a child can hear and not think that is is okay to swear. Words can be almost poetic, creating pictures in your mind…

That grandmother was setting an example – and probably her daughter grew up hearing the same talk, because she had all the explicative’s down just like Granny did. Ohhh, it frosted my butt… grrrr. enough to have the spot light on my post for tonight. Folks remember.. we are always setting examples for our kids. They look up to us… they learn from us… Just ask yourself.. what do you want your kids to imitate of you??

And whatever you do not want them to do, well it is time to stop … because they admire you, they want to be like you… just like these little girls looked up to their grandmother and mom… Love to all… Mrs Justa… alias Cindy

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Okay another memory coming to surface, because of a recent event. This past weekend I was paying bills and realized I was running out of stamps. I do not do alot of actual mailing of bills, we pay some from the bank. But I do not like to be without any. So being we live in the country- we can actually order stamps from our home by putting the order in the mailbox, the rural carrier picks it up and like magic in the next days mail the stamps have arrived.  I know there is talk of the postage going up, so I wrote on the envelope “ 20 stamps please.. $8.80 “ and I put our address on it.

Monday afternoon the post office called and asked if we wanted stamps, Mark said I guess we did, and the person said, “Well there is no money in the envelope” Boy do I feel like a fool! So they asked him if Tuesday we would make sure we put the check in the mail box. Which we did, and I did get my stamps.

But this brings back a memory from the early 80s. I lived in the country than too, we had a driveway that was 500 feet long and elevated, so I could see when the mailman came. Each year at Christmas time I would put my 50 Christmas cards in the mailbox and the money for postage for them. I did this for a few years, and figured with the volume of stamps needed that they  ran it through the postage meter, because I never got stamps back to put on the cards.

Stamps in the 1980s were not self sticking, I would either lick them or run a sponge on them quickly. I remember making them too wet and they would not stick. And the glue taste… GROSS!

Well it was the third Christmas season and I had just made it down the long slippery driveway to the mailbox and back up to the house before the mailman got there. I am watching from the dining room, I remember  the snow was deep and I did not want to make a trip down there until I was sure that the mailman came. I saw him pull up… but he never left.. he just sat there. I am thinking he is stuck or something, so I trudge down there with shovel in hand.

To my surprise he is not stuck. He is just looking at my neatly placed stack of 50 cards in need of postage. I asked him if he was okay.. He scratched his head and almost apologetically said in a country old timer drawl.. “Mame… I was just thinking about having to lick 50 stamps again this year for you, and I am not sure I want to…” Okay.. can you say embarrassed?? How about feeling like a fool?? How about feeling arrogant when I am far from arrogant???
Needless to say, I took my cards back and asked if he could just bring me the stamps the next day. He was very grateful.. and me… well I have never done that again. So wherever you are Mr. Mailman.. again I say I am so sorry… …

Love to all , Mrs Justa alias Cindy

Who am I to others? Did you ever wonder that? Who am I when people refer to me? Or do people ever refer to me? Maybe I am just there… I am taking up space, but not significant enough to be anything for conversation. I use this picture because it goes on forever- like life, and yet close to you are tons of rocks, each one different, and to some maybe insignificant, but to others they may represent different things.

100_4137_edited My life… my job… my experiences in every day life… all the paths of others lives I have crossed, more than the number of rocks here…what impression do I make on others?

I was thinking this during my ride in today- I dunno why … maybe because as I drive down the interstate of life, people glance over- some expressionless, some smile, some look discontent…going to who knows where, for who knows what. Sometimes they are looking first, before I am looking back. A quick 65 mph interaction. in a second they are gone—but the impression seems to last for a long time.

Me.. I am guilty of taking that quick glance, and people give me a first impression. I get a look of amazement sometimes, as I am passed by someone reading a paper as they are chatting on the phone and barreling down the highway- or putting on makeup, or chowing down on a Mc Donald’s sandwich and holding a drink…I think I figure that they figure they are invincible. I find others looking kinda lost, sad. Have you ever been really bummed driving down the road? Crying your eyes out , and trying to see through the tears to get to the other side- wherever that will be?

I have, I can remember different times of a severely broken heart, and for some reason I have to go somewhere. So I am sure folks driving by me must have looked and seen the pain.

I saw someone like that the other day, and I felt their pain- which was weird… because I knew not what caused there pain- I just saw the emotion. Their emotion brought my past feelings of woe to the surface.

Oh and then there are Kids— they make me wonder what they see when the see me— I love going down the highway and having some snot nosed little brat stick their tongue out at me—like they are all grand and I am dog meat. That causes me to wonder- 1) why did they do that to ME? 2) Why am I feeling hurt because this non-adult little imp is making faces at me. ……What will they remember from that quick passing? Will they even remember me? or is it just a person in a car- and no matter who was in the car- they would have done it anyhow. ( I like the second thought better)

Life’s journeys are really unbelievable if you look at every thing you see ,  at everyone that you pass by in a day. Don’t cha ever wonder…. what people think? >>>> I do… can’t help it.. I just do… Love to all… mrs justa.. Alias Cindy

Okay, I was going to post on this really disturbing article

Bizarre Ways to Beat Stress and Unwind // Woman receiving a snake massage (© Uriel Sinai/Getty Images)

I read on SNAKE therapy. So folks I guess like snakes slithering over them as massage therapy. Count me out on that one ! Someone comes towards me with a cage of snakes- they better look quick, cuz I will be doing a Road Runner- Beep Beep take off that would make an Olympic Athlete proud!. I mean I would be outta there, probably so fast the skin would come flying off the snakes…

You gotta be nuts to do this… ( photo from MSNBC news site)

But instead I have to share my gym experience today. Hoping that if this woman is hopping around sites, maybe she will read it! Ahhhh she really annoyed me, pissed me off, made me angry.

But I will get over it.

There are 4 bikes with TVs on them- many others without TVs on them. There was this one woman who was deeply tanned- ( leathery looking tanned) , with her Sunday paper, her purse and her coat, her cell phone , and an ear piece plugged into the TV . I almost fell on my butt the first time I walked by her- she was on the end bike.

She had part of the unread portion of the paper behind here- balancing on the drink holder. She had 1 section on the read outs blocking the information, each time she finished a section of the paper- she flung it on the ground, in no particular form- just strewed however it landed, her coat was tossed on the floor, and her purse was on the floor( It was the size of a small travel overnight bag) open and spread apart. Kinda reminded me of the floor of the den as someone is sipping their coffee and reading the Sunday Paper… but news flash— this is the gym LADY! This went on for a good 25 minutes before a bike opened up, and for an additional 25 minutes as I was biking. She thought so much of herself, it was really getting to me. Than she starts talking on the phone !. Once she finished biking- she continued to converse on the phone as she strolled over to one cleaning station ( furthest away from her)- talking on her phone as she got the spray- now what you are supposed to do is spray your paper towel and wipe the machine off with that.

Her- noooooooooooooo- she strolled back- on the phone – with the spray bottle- and sprayed the bike- than back to return the spray bottle, than to another station to get the paper towel, than to another area to throw the towel out- still on the phone. Finally she returned to the bike to gather up the pieces of paper all over the place and finally get out of there. Ahhh- she drove me nuts. I know I should not let things like this bother me… but her conceit, her arrogance, her  presumption that people were getting a bonus for her being there. AHHHHHHHHHHH the good thing- she made me pedal faster.

Okay. I feel better now… uggg…. Have a wonderful evening. Love Mrs jsuta… alias Cindy

Things remind me of things I have done. Does that happen to you? And sometimes the way the thing that triggers a memory is like a chain reaction- by the time it stops the spinning roulette wheel of the trillions of memories spinning in the vast space in my memory bank, well sometimes I forget what got me going to this memory.

Like this one… today I saw a fire truck speeding down a side street on my way to work, that triggered a thought “ I wonder if it is a fire?” and than I thought “maybe water in the basement,” than it led to “gee I wonder if there are kids in the house” and that turned into a quick ride through the vortex of my mind, back to 1967 . It was early one very cold winter morning, I mean early- like maybe 5:30 AM and the temp below zero cold. I had had a sore throat and could not speak very well and I was home with my younger sisters- ages 6 and 4 and one of my younger brothers age 8.

My mom was out driving my other younger brother on his morning paper route. It took her about an hour or so to make the trip.

Now I need to add – we lived in a split level home- 5 levels, split up by maybe 8 steps between levels. The second level had the laundry area- which butted up to an outside wall. I heard something weird, and peeked thru the railing down to the second level and noticed a spray and steam in this second level up. Well me- the scardie  cat that I was, sent my 8 year old brother down to check it out real quick. Telling him he was “the man of the house” .
He came back and reported to me that there was water everywhere, and it was climbing up towards the stairs of the second level.

So here I am in panic mode- visualizing that the lowest level ( the basement) of the house was totally flooded and the second level was about to flood- so I called the fire department, the police and the water department ( they did not answer) I can remember frantically telling the dispatchers that I was home with small children and we were in a house that was flooding , we needed help right away.

So naturally the fire department and police came to my rescue. Now remember my mom was to be gone maybe an hr or so. So these guys come flying in with pumps and hoses to pump out the 6 or 8 feet of water…and I have all the kids gathered around me to protect them, we are trembling, whimpering, and glad the heroes are there… and my mom comes down the street only to see all these rescue vehicles in front of her house, men running in…

So she comes as close as she can get to the house, and she and my brother come running in too…I am feeling scared yet proud- I save us and the house….than silence and the fireman said it was only a burst water pipe…. one that had maybe just sprung the leak… the basement was dry… and the mist- well it was hot water that was spraying.

Maybe—maybe there was a millimeter of water on the floor of the second level.

Boy was I embarrassed, and did I get in trouble for not going down and checking myself. Naturally I than got mad at my 8 yr old brother for giving me an inaccurate report…. and I also had to write an apology letter to the police and the fire department.. because all those “nice men” had to leave their “warm homes” and families to come over for NOTHING…. and “what about someone with a real emergency… “ My mom never understood at the time I thought I was making a really good responsible decision…hmmm how often do our kids do stuff that in their eyes they were doing the right thing and we just can’t see why they would do it. Love to all.. Mrs Justa.. Cindy

A very good friend of mine had a dentist appointment, and she came into work fearing her mouth was drooping, and describing the sensation of trying to take a drink. It really is a weird feeling after getting a slew of Novocain. I was reminded of this time, many years ago, when I crammed a pretty intense amount of work into a 4 or 5 hr appointment. I told the dentist, lets just do it all at once. Well he did, he drilled, did a root canal, and would shove gauze things between my lip and gum as he filled a tooth. This went on so long, I was unsure if I would ever close my mouth again. My jaws ached from being held open.

When I  had arrived that morning, I had to park 2 blocks down from his office. Some of the fillings were big ones, I remember he had what felt like a metal clamp that he would put around the tooth and then tighten it in , with what felt like a thumb screw. it always felt like it was slicing my gum the tighter it got, but the Novocain kept the pain away.

After this incredible day in the dentist chair I strolled to my car. Feeling self conscious because it felt like my face was drooping big time to the left. I remember smiling slightly to passer-byers as I headed for the car, and these people would look at me strange. I knew my mouth must be drooping, and when I smiled I must look like a stroke patient.

Finally after what seemed like a mile walk, with everyone gawking at me, I finally arrived at my car. I needed to see how bad the droop was. Well to my surprise, when I looked in the mirror on the back of the visor, I found- not a drooping 1/2 smile, but instead a dangling piece of very bloodied gauze hanging off my top left side of my mouth .Now this gauze wasn’t taking peek- no this sucker was hanging on by a thread, swinging and dangling off that lip by a thread, and it was gross.

I could not get the car started quick enough , as I played back in my head ALL the people who walked by me and made those weird faces.

I can laugh at it now… but than.. I was totally embarrassed, … a deep hole would have been nice to crawl into… and now. before I leave the dentist office, I go in the bathroom and check to make sure I am leaving only with what I came in with!.

Love to all.. say AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH… Mrs justa.. alias Cindy

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I guess I just do not understand some people. There was a call in show this morning where the subject was what people thought about the Census. And there were people who called in and really felt it was simple to fill out and to just do it. Than there were these folks calling in screaming about the government being in their business, and their rights are being taken away from them, oh they ranted and raved for what seemed like an eternity.

I was amazed. The Census is the way for the government to see what needs have changed all across this country. Do you live in an area where there has been growth of homes being built, or maybe many homes foreclosed on and people have left. With the information from the Census it gives a birds eye view of the people and children in any area, of the average gross income, of the number of people living in a home.

It is because we live in America that these people have the freedom to call in and openly speak their minds. It is because we live in this country that we have roads that are safe, and public assistance , and opportunities that people in other countries may only dream of.

People will complain if when the numbers are tallied, and because of people not submitting the information, there is less then what there should be coming in to assist in aid to the schools, hence forth your school taxes would have to go up. Or less money going to your counties… so your property taxes will go up.

The government has many ways to find out about you, the census is not to spy on you… it is a fact finding way. And if you want to save money, fill out the damn form and don’t make the government pay someone to find you. My goodness, I am amazed at the self centeredness , victimism of some people.

To them I say, if you don’t like it, you can leave the USA and miss what you had. But for those who like being in this country, really, just take your blue or black ink pen and answer the much simplified form. Heck they even pay your postage!!. I for one am glad I live in the USA… Love to all, Mrs Justa.. alias Cindy

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