September 2008

Where does the road lead right now, what path is the flow of life taking?A creek running through the woods. (photo is courtesy of adobe.)I don’t know about you, but I am thinking all the money scares and wall street scares and politics are not being helped by the media. Blah.. blah .. blah. Don’t worry about the politics, in my humble opinion neither party has made the best choice for candidates.

And the financial wreck this country is in, well NEWS FLASH, it did not just happen over night.

This is a nation of “I wants’ and “how can I screw the next guy” and “how come they have that, I want it too”

We are spoiled, we are pathetic as a nation. 24 hr lives, no rest, tv stations on all night, drive thru- fast food whenever you want it, obesity, crimes, grocery stores all hrs day and night. Why do we need a grocery store that is so big you have to make sure you are well rested before you tackle going grocery shopping?  Why do we need lines of plazas, and malls with golf courses and water parks in them.

Why do we need a Home Depot and Across the street a Lowes? In my opinion, we are a bunch of spoiled, wanting , and not willing to wait for business hrs , needing a 3-4 thousand square foot houses, society. And now the economy is suffering. How many credit card offers do you get in the mail a week? And how many of you can pay off the credit card potential for maxing them out?

I think we need to stop.. I MEAN STOP. And see what is important for survival instead of what we think we need.

And we have to come together. We need to say no to all the extras, tighten the belt, start making things from scratch and not buying all these already made items. I am disgusted and tired of the dems and the repubs blaming each other, and I am tired of the entitlement society, and the kids needing cell phones, and the kids getting 100.00 games for their video games. STOP… get out a deck of cards…. play a game of chutes and ladders… I know something a book. Lets let life slow down a little. And get the world back to where it should be. Sigh… CIndy


Okay, some may think I am totally nuts, but I am not really. Have you ever had a passion for something in life? Once you find it you never want to let it go?

Well when I graduated from high school, back in 1971, my year book photo stated that my want in life was to go into nursing. Naturally, I did not go that path immediately, no it took me about 15 yrs, and many off the beaten path challenges before I went for my dream.

I was a single parent, with a child who was about to enter kindergarten, so he started school, and so did I. I have worked in many fields of nursing imagefrom a med-surg floor, to an internal medicine office, to an HMO case manager, to a catastrophic case manager, a triage in a family practice and a  float nurse in the family practice, and now a manager of a utilization management team at a third party administrator. I can not get away from the hunger of hands on clinical nursing though.

So about 3 hrs ago, after discussions with Mark and major soul searching, I took the leap. I faxed a resume, application, and cover letter to a hospital not too far away form here. I am looking to stay where I am and go back into clinical on every other weekend.

I have pulled out my uniforms that have be silently sitting in safe storage waiting for me to take the leap.The washer is working extra hard this weekend , lovingly churning detergent and fabric softener through all my whites and scrubs. We have a spare closet, that will be the uniform closet for now. If this does not happen, if they do not want me, I have the intent to follow this need to provide care, so I will look elsewhere. 

Mark and I have had discussions on this , and he and Jeff both do support me on this venture. So we will see.

I believe that nursing is a God given gift, I have worked with really good nurses, and they are blessed. I feel I am a good nurse, and I long to do it. Wish me luck. Love to all, Mrs Justa

Here the little is sleeping in his crib at grampa and gramma’s house ! 100_1730 This was taken 2 wks ago when Adrianne and Josh came up for an evening here. Since then the little guy has been now sleeping in his car seat, as he is having some problems with heartburn/ reflux. So he sleeps ion the coziness of the cuddly insert in his car seat.

He is precious, what else can I say? He has been having rough times with gassiness and cries more then he was before. His appetite is good, and he is gaining about an oz a day. So that is good. He is tiny, and it is a miracle to hold him.

Holding any baby is special, but I gotta tell ya, holding the child of my child and his wife, well that is truly unbelievable.

People told me that we would love the grandparent part of life, and they are right. I know we are just beginning this journey, and more special times will be following, but this is a special guy.

I can’t wait till I see him again ! They have been over every Saturday evening, next week Mark and I will head over there. To all enjoy those special moments in life, for when they pass, they are gone. Love Cindy

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There are some thoughts on Friends that Paul Williams wrote-

” Friends are like good wine, And I’ve had the best; I don’t always show it, But no one knows better than I…”

And that is so true. Mark and I have friends that are always there. Cherished and loved. They do not judge us, they just are there. We do not judge them, we just love knowing them.

We do not see our friends nearly enough, but when we do we always have a great time. We laugh, we share our thoughts, we tease each other and we create smiles imprinted in our minds that no one can take away.


“Friends love your good side and they live with your bad; Want you and need you when no one else knows you’re alive.” Wow, is that not true? This morning we had breakfast with some friends that have know Mark since high school.

100_0484_edited They have to be the most genuine people I know. They are real, and even though I have not known them for as long as they have known Mark, they accept me in part of their friendship. I meant them in the late 1980s so I have known them for a while now. We always have a great time when we get together, and I never want the time to end. The nice thing is knowing that it will not be too long before we all get together again.

I have some friends that I have meant in nursing and I have one friend who I have known since 1963. It is weird because we work together now, and have on and off in the past 20 years. We went to nursing school together. I have a few more friends I meant at Crouse and one I meant in 1995 when I went into insurance review nursing. All these people are true friends to me. We do not hang out like people we know out of work, but we are close and really care about one another.

And we have some blogging friends. Their relationships are fairly new, but they too seem very sincere. They are real people, not afraid to put their feeling out for others to see. And that is so important, because peer relationships help others see that what they are experiencing is not unique.

To all the friends, thanks for being there. And be safe, take care of yourself. Love, Mrs Justa

So to our friends, we have not tons of friends, but we have true friends, thanks for being there. .

This weekend Mark and I went for a ride around the area we live in. We probably did about a 20 mile radius and one of the places I wanted to photograph was this field. 100_1738On my way to work last week it was more vibrant, all the flowers stood tall, just like a bunch are suns, glowing their cheerfulness  upon anyone who came upon them. This weekend, well they were starting to droop, kinda looking depressed that the summer is winding down and fall is coming in to set it’s color splotches on the world.

I think we had a really great summer, as far as the weather went. Weekends were more rainy then normal, and it seemed like more Saturday nights were rainy then not.

But we had fairly comfortable nights, only used the AC a handful of times, and the grass stayed green all season.

Sunflowers are neat- at least to me. I have heard from various people though that there seems to be more sunflower fields being harvested. I am not sure why. Maybe they are using it for sunflower seeds for the birds, or for sunflower oil. I wonder how many seeds it takes to make a 2 quart container of sunflower oil? Or do they use other parts of the plant? I do not know,

What I do know, is I always see smiley faces in my mind when I see a sunflower. There was one on the way to work that is all by itself, by the railroad tracks, that sunflower stands about 8-10 feet tall! It is almost scary looking to see a flower that tall. I do not know why it is there, I figured maybe someone spit a sunflower seed out while waiting for the train and poof- a plant appeared.

I wish you all a sunshiny day, and I hope these flowers bring a smile to you, like they do to me each day. Love, Mrs Justa

” If I could save time in a bottle, this first thing that I’ld like to do, is to >>>” How would you finish that sentence? image I am pondering this as I hear the tons of news reports going over the devastation from this most recent hurricane. And thinking of those who chose to stay behind, to challenge the storm, those whose lives may in danger, and I wonder what they would save if they could save time in a bottle.

Would it be the challenge of fighting a force much bigger then we are? Would it be special moments with a friend, a loved one, a moment , what would it be?

For me, I would save times of freedom from stress, I would save minutes with precious people that have passed on, I would save my sons laughter as a toddler and child, I would save cuddling him at night and reading to him. I would save the moment I met Mark, and the moment I meant my first husband, the moment I graduated from nursing school, watching my son graduate from high school, watching him and Adrianne graduate from college, Watching them both marry the love of their lives, the first time I held Brandon,sitting on my dads lap ( God I miss him so), my mom’s wisdom, having good friends, feeling wanted. That would be what I would save in a bottle. How about you? My prayers that you treasure those special moments, Cindy

Well the dirt moat is now grass, and the place is becoming more like home every day. I like it, actually I love it. It does take a lot of work, and a lot of being very frugal, but I like it.

Mr Justa and I will sit on the park bench and watch the world go by. Being we live on the corner lot, and the dead end street we are on has about 45 houses, a lot of people drive by to leave and then return. 100_1706 HE is beginning to finally feel better, His leg is not great, but he is doing better.

They are friendly folk, most of them , they wave at us, we wave at them. There is usually a breeze, it feels like a lake breeze, even though we are 20 miles from Lake Ontario, we are both afraid that may mean some pretty hefty lake effect snow adventures this winter.

But this is where we are, and it is better by far then where we used to be. So we will have to endure, and make the best of it. The way I figure it, every winter I have 7 “white knuckle days” as I refer to them. That is when there is drifting of snow, slippery roads and me singing The Lords Prayer all the way home at the top of my lungs.

I find comfort in the Lord’s Prayer, and I truly feel that God has taken the wheel form me on some of those drives. My knees knock and my fingers grip the wheel and we make it home, and I am not sure sometimes how. It feels in the midst of it that I become a tool and God it manipulating me to make the right moves at the right time. Some may think I am nuts when I say that, but I live it, I feel it, I know it.

May you all find inner strength as you need to, and lay you each find something special in your life and focus on it. I have so much to be thankful for, and my husband, my son, my daughter by Mark’s first marriage,their spouses, my grandson, my family,  my job, my faith and friends. Focus on those that are special to you. Love , Mrs Justa

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