Time Waits For No One

As we continue life day by day, it is ever more apparent to me that life is precious. We have no guarantees that we will see the next day, week, month, or year. I was looking at a photo from a very long time ago. It is a photo of me and my siblings, well one of them wasn’t physically there so we held up his picture, for in spirit he was standing there with us.

What stands out to me more today than it did in years past, is that not one, or two, but 3 of my siblings and our mom have passed. So to take this photo again there would be me, in the front row alone…and in the back row from left to right, Martha, Chuck, Melanie, Peter would be really in it, and Tom would be in it. Karen ( in the sleeveless sundress and Don on the far right, would not). As I look at this, it brings me comfort for every single precious moment I have shared with each of them, and yet sad to know the precious moments now are in memories and in the sense they are watching over me at times.

An example of them living in my memory is whenever I fold corner sheets. Karen and her husband were visiting one Thanksgiving, and we had the 3 grandchildren over for the night too. Friday after the grandkids had gone home, I was putting beds away, and folding the sheets. Karen was next to me, and I just folded the corner sheet, she laughed out of amazement and said “Teach me how to do that !” I asked her to do what? She said, “How do you neatly fold a corner sheet ?” So I unfolded it and demonstrated the method, she was so thrilled she wanted to fold any corner sheet that was left. A couple days later we all went to Jeff and Amanda’s for dinner. Karen out of the blue, with a big old smile on her face asked Jeff and Amanda where their linen closet was, she wanted to show them what she had learned. Proudly Karen got one of Amanda’s already folded corner sheets, she unfolded it, and very accurately folded it so you couldn’t tell it was a corner sheet. Karen’s laugh was contagious, her smile I think circled her entire face as her eyes lit up with joy and such a love of life. So yes she’s passed away, but things like that live on.

For each of the siblings that have passed away, I have so many special memories. So many lessons my mom instilled in us. Even my dad who passed away LONG before this picture was taken, he lives on in me. I remember holding his hand, it felt so comforting, I felt safe. A simple thing like holding a hand can create a loving memory that lives on long after we have passed away.

Each day, each encounter we have with people we know well, and some we know casually, and some it may be a quick encounter as you walk by one another or maybe hold a door for someone, each minute each breath we take is one more blessed opportunity to treasure the moment and make or get a memory.

This past week Mark was taking a nap and I had just left for a hair appointment. When he got up from his nap I wasn’t home yet. He explained how very unusual, how almost weird it was to walk out of the bedroom and I wasn’t there. Being that one part of what was a couple.

We talk about life and try to plan for different scenarios, and one is trying to plan the future if one of us has passed on. How would our next day be, how would it affect our day-to-day life, where would we live, and how would our budget need to be recalculated, have we carefully provided the necessary people with all aspects of our life, we even prepaid for the funeral home so that isn’t something they need to worry about. How life would be as one. Some might think this is weird or not necessary, or maybe that we shouldn’t talk about death… but it is a fact of life and the loss of a loved one is hard enough, why not try to make some of it easier. Oh, we don’t dwell on not living, we just realize it is a part of life.

I have seen many times when a death happens, and people are beyond lost. It is natural to feel like the world has changed forever, I remember wishing I had just one more hug, one more moment, I just want the world to stop turning for a minute so I could get my bearings. I remember thinking I wish I had spent more time with that friend or family member. But there isn’t a way to go back and change that. Now is the time to take those moments.

So as you step the next step, as you breathe the next breath, remember how precious life is. You don’t have to be wealthy to enjoy life, money doesn’t buy us one extra moment, but each moment is a blessing yet to be had. As I look out the window I see seagulls flying over the river, an eagle soaring up high in the sky, and the leaves on the trees waving back and forth, it is so peaceful, and they are there for anyone to see, enjoy, and treasure…

As I go off to grab some laundry from the dryer and take a walk to a path by the river, my wish for you is that you take time to appreciate those in your life, and the beauty of life. Life isn’t always easy, but life is a blessing, each moment a gift. There is so very much around us no matter where we live. We just have to stop and see it.

Thanks for stopping by.

Until later, Mrs Justa ( alias Cindy)

 

Special Time with Family

These past couple of weeks have brought so many great memories, times of comfort, and many smiles. Our journey began on the weekend before Halloween and continued through election day. To start off with, we went to the Berkshire Mountains and rented a condo that could take up to 8 people. Jeff and Amanda and their kids were able to join us for the weekend. The condo was at the base of a ski resort. Fall colors were dwindling, but the environment was so calming and peaceful. The weather was perfect and the scenery breathtaking. We were able to watch the sun setting over the mountains, the kids got to do a little trick or treating, and we enjoyed the outdoors and some of the amenities offered at the facility. It was definitely a very enjoyable few days

We had lots of time together, and also went off for a few hours on Saturday- they went and hiked upward on a mountain, and we opted to drive up a different mountain and walk once we were at the top. We knew a hike up a mountain was in the more youthful days of our lives, a time that has since past. Heck they would probably still be waiting for us. LOL

We love spending time with all of them, so this was super special. This weekend gave us time to carve out the day-to-day activities and responsibilities and let us just be with them, such a special family. It was a great beginning for the next week and a half. A time that was filled with reminders about how special family is. There is a history that is unique in each family, there are times of sorrow and joy, and through them all, I believe that family is the glue that holds life together.

We came home a couple days early from Massachusettes before heading to Michigan. We did some stuff around the house, and unpacked, to pack again. The next part of our journey was to head to Michigan for my brother Don’s 90th birthday weekend. We were very lucky with the weather on that journey too. We got to see some of our family from Michigan. We do try to get to Michigan a couple times a year, and this was a special time for sure.

My family is large, there initially are 9 children, 3 of whom my father had with his first wife. She passed away, and a few years later, he and my mother had 6 more children. So needless to say, there is quite an age span. My oldest brother is 31 years older than the youngest of my siblings. So to be able to spend time with some family members over the course of 1 1/2 weeks was great.

Don has always been very special to me. He has been a beacon in the night for me on many steps along my journey of life. It is so refreshing that his family has never lost the “family” part of being a family. Sunday dinners are shared with Don and Sally and their 3 adult children, and their spouses. Dave and Vicki’s children now live away from them, so it’s not easy to make Sunday dinners all the time. They gather weekly, they stay in touch with one another, and they all are unique in their own ways. Family dinners bring conversation and laughter, and what I really love is that they are a real family. The world seems filled with political and moral attacks that have torn relationships and family units apart. Families can be torn apart by so many factors, and yet this family stays together, silently they have their beliefs in the political arena, and in moral thoughts too, yet they respect that each is an individual and it need not be a discussion or an attack. I wish everywhere was like that.

On Saturday we were able to share time with not only the Michigan group, but also my sister Melanie and her better half Dan came from Liverpool, and Lynda ( one of our nieces) came in from Rhode Island. Plus our great niece Natalie and her brother Leighton were there too. It was great to see everyone. Lynda was able to get her dad Chuck (another of our brothers) on the phone and they did face time on Saturday. It was so touching to see them talk on the phone, face to face from so many miles away. Chuck is a few years younger than Don, he lives in Arizona, so they don’t see each other. It was really emotional to see their love travel through the screen of the phone. Chuck asks Don ” How did you get to be 90?” and Don laughing and saying “Hey you are almost 90 too!” As they talked, it was so neat how they sounded alike.

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On Sunday we got to spend another special family dinner time, and this time our niece Amy, her brother ( our nephew) Felix, and Amy’s husband Greg, shared the time with us. Amy and Felix are 2 of the 5 children my sister Karen had. We do not see them often, and it was nice to spend time with them. There were times when Amy laughed and it reminded me of when she was much younger. Her husband Greg loves her immensely, it is apparent all the time. Felix has a smile that is contagious, and it was a nice time spending some of Sunday with them

Each gathering was special, each gathering filled with laughter, discussions, and delicious food. Don was sung to twice, and even sang along “Happy Birthday to ME” as everyone sang “Happy birthday to you”

On our way home we stopped for the night in Niagara Falls. It was a perfect ending to a perfect couple of weeks. It was a cold night, but absolutely beautiful.

Journeys such as these are so fulfilling in so many ways. As I sat back and looked around the room, I had flashbacks of times gone by, times never ever able to repeat. So many moments have flown by as the clock of life clicks on.

It is always nice to get home, to regroup, to recharge before the next journey comes to reality.

I hope I never lose the ability to realize that each morning I awaken, well it is another blessing. And there is so much to be thankful for.

Until Later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

My First…..

We all have firsts, our first breath, our first steps, our first day of school, the list seems infinite for as long as we are breathing really we add to the list. Well today, it is my first car.

My first car is so fresh in my mind. I was 17 at the time, I had been dismissed from college ( that is totally another story-  they asked me to leave because I had been in the hospital for 3 weeks with an incredible infection- so they said I missed too much to stay. They did, however, keep my tuition) and had bills for transportation and to repay my college tuition.

I was working at an Italian restaurant in Syracuse as a counter girl. ( It means a waitress who does not get too many tips as it is at the counter, so people did not tip often). I would often have to take the bus to get there and to my second job. I had to have a second job, and fortunately, that was within walking distance of our home, I was at a gas station, pumping gas, checking the fluids and washing the windows as the customer’s vehicles were filling up.

At this gas station, the owner had obtained from a taxi- limousine company a few checker automobiles. Well, I really needed a car to get to the Italian restaurant 15 miles from home, and I fell in love with this car. It was $500.00. I had no idea how I could pay for it, but I was going to do whatever I could to try to get some sort of financial help. My mom was a widow, and she had 4 kids at home, she was not able to financially help me( and if she was I probably would not have felt right borrowing from her) . She suggested I ask my brother Don. She did say that when we ask a question, we have to be prepared for the answer.

Don and his wife Sally said yes, they said I could pay back weekly what I could afford. I said I could send them $25.00 a week, so they mailed me the check and worked out a payment plan with me. I was extremely committed to pay this back, and even added an extra ending payment for a thank you to them

I had never driven a standard before, but I knew with practice I would be okay. The “limousine” was really one of the airport taxi cabs. It had a bench seat in the front and way back, with two other folding split-bench seats in the middle. It could take 9 passengers easily. With the folding seats folded into the back – out of the way, I could have put a double bed size water bed on the floor.

It got incredibly good milage, for a car this size, I got around 28 MPG. The rules were I had to take off the company names and operator licensing information. I got some spray paint, cut stencil “Smily faces ” out of full newspaper and I made this my smiling limousine.

At the time I had a BEST BEST guy friend. He helped me out a number oftimes in my teenage years, and he knew me like no one else knew me. He was a true best friend. He talked me off proverbial cliffs during our teenage years, and I added his name to the car paintings because I knew I would not be where I was, without his help.

This car was enormous! It had some unique “features” like when going around a curve the extra-long Left passenger door would sometimes pop open. Had there been oncoming traffic at any of these moments, I would have wiped them out. So I found a way to secure it to avoid that from happening. It also was so long I had to park away from stores as it took up two spaces.

I would help some of my friends and their friends out if they wanted to go to a local hang out to dance, as I had plenty of room, and I did not drink, so it was a nice way to help people. I had posters on the ceiling, and it was a HAPPY car.

It was kinda tough to drive on slippery roads if the car was without any riders, as it was pretty long and light. But I drove carefully in all kinds of weather. My Italian Restaurant job ended rather suddenly when the boss accused me of stealing Veal Cutlet Steaks. ( The cook was stealing them but he needed the cook, so I was more able to replace ) So before he fired me, I quit!

This opened the door for a job closer to home working in a photo finishing place only 4 miles away from home. This job turned into my profession for years to come. It had a retail store but also a HUGE mailorder business where people would mail in their film from their cameras, and we would process it, and send them the finished black and white, or color prints, or color slides.

I remember one day cutting up and packaging a color print order, and low and behold someone from TEXAS had a couple pictures of my Smiling Limousine. They took the picture on Onondaga Lake Parkway at some time, to me that was sooo cooolll. Someone found my car picture-worthy.

There are many memories that come to mind, one incredible journey to Vermont during a blizzard ( which is another post altogether) – but the one really kinda humourous time is like it happened yesterday.

My mom needed her car fixed, I was not using my car, so she asked if she could borrow it. I said sure. Off she went, this 50 + year old woman, in this Smiling Limousine, it was neat to see her drive this. When she got home she said she was not sure if something might be wrong with the car, or if I found people honking at it because they thought the car was cool. Immediately I started laughing so hard, I had forgotten to tell her about my bumper sticker….

It said

Needless to say, she did not borrow my car again! You should have seen her face, it went from embarrassed, to a little shocked, and eventually, she must have relived the honking moments, her face squinched up and her eyes started to fill with happy tears and she laughed. This was followed by a comment of next time, ….. you might want to let the driver know about that bumper sticker…

I had some many memories, this is one that surfaced … many more to come.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Moments Saved in a Memory Vault

It is strange how moments stick with me, no matter how long ago they are. For moments lead to other moments, and each and every moment in life, it leads to the next.

Sometimes I wonder about why I am remembering a certain moment in the past, something triggers a door to open, a door that a memory has been tucked tightly behind. It can be a song, a tone of voice, a photo, a slide, a memoir. The lists go on and on, and before I know it, for a brief period of time I am back to that moment. Back to the emotions of the time.

I have been scanning slides from years ago, and about to scan photos from birth to now. By opening up images, it is creating avenues for those special moments, those moments that were worth capturing on film, those moments that have been locked in memory vaults. It is kinda fun, because it reminds me of how minutes, hours, days, months years can be filled with challenges, with tears with laughter,

The Road of Life

and it is okay. I felt the joy, the sadness, the adventure, the lessons learned… it is all depending on the turn in the road of life I am remembering.

I have no regrets, oh sure there are times I might have handled differently had I been older, but I constantly remind myself that each part of the journey had to be when it was to create the road of life I have traveled on. Events have created emotions of joy and heartbreak, but that is okay.

I was back in the early days of my life, in Bridgeport Conn.and literally, I became back to that time. We lived in a second-floor flat. There are so many memories I have from there, from the first 4 1/2 yrs of my life, one I will share today.

Our parents had this magazine rack of sorts. It was basket type woven and had a handle. The purpose was to hold magazines and newspapers that were to be perused by the people who were older than us in the household. But to me and my sister Pam, ( she was 1 1/2 yrs older than me) well we would sneak over to it and it became so much more. It was like a mini amusement center. A place to squirm through.

It would rock a little as we scooted from one side to the other. I can hear my mom saying to us, ” What are you two doing?” and we would innocently pretend we were not emptying it, grab a piece of paper and make it look like we were reading. But the evidence clearly showed differently.

We ended up being advised we should not do that and had to put the papers and magazines back, ( only to wait for the next opportunity to do it again). We restacked the papers, magazines, but not in the order or neatness they were in before we started.

That magazine holder, I remember it survived quite a few moves and kids. I know it made it into the last house we lived in Bayberry, but I really think it is probably long gone by now. And it is weird, to this very second, I can smirk over it, over those feelings of sneaking, and the feelings of trying to be quiet so mom would not know what we were up to.

Ah… moments in time. Just love them. Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

My Sister , My Light

I have been remembering so many things in my life that have helped me get to where I am today. There are so many people, so many events, so many great times and so many not so proud of times. Times of smiles and times of tears. Through them all, no matter how near or far, there has always been my oldest sister Karen.

Karen smiling up at me when I was one

Karen was 10 when I was born.As long as I can remember, she was someone I totally cherished, someone who always had a hand to hold, a smile, a comforting feeling for me. There have been many years where we have been miles apart in distance, but she never was far away in my heart, my mind, my being.

I can remember Karen looking after me, guiding me and sharing special moments. She would hold my hand to keep me safe, and she may not have ever realized that I would think often I wanted to be like her.

We initially lived in Bridgeport Conn. for the first 4 1/2 yrs of my life. She was 8 when my parents married, my father was a widower, from what I understand Karen’s mom had died as a result of an accident. Karen had 2 brothers that were older than Karen, and through this bond of marriage,  I not only had brothers and sisters from my mom and dad’s marriage, but we had immediately 3 older siblings, all who are loved and cherished. My mom and dad had 7 additional children from their bond in marriage, one died shortly after birth, the rest of us helped to make up a family of nine brothers and sisters.

I remember many times if anyone told us that our 3 oldest siblings and the 6 of us were “stepbrothers and sisters’  that my mother and father would immediately tell us there are no “step” brothers or sisters” in our family, we are all brothers and sisters and to never ever forget that. And to this day, I cherish each one of my siblings.

Karen was someone I thought always had it together. Oh I am sure there are times when she was in trouble for one thing or another, but never in my eyes.

This is in 1957/1958. Karen holding Pams hand, and I am in the striped dress

As we grew up, we moved to Skaneateles for a few years. Our dad was a traveling salesman and was gone a few days during the week. My mom was pregnant a lot during the first 10 yrs of my life. As early school-age kids, we had responsibilities that helped mom. It was just what life was about.

We lived at 3 different houses, the first on was on a hill on Rte 20, I remember the water was not always good for drinking.  Karen, my sister Pam ( who was one yr older than me) and I would help out by getting water for our family. We would each take thermoses down the hill to a gas station to fill them with water. Pam was 6 at the time, I was 5. I remember Karen helping with the heavier thermos and making sure we walked as far off the highway as possible. It was down the hill, and as a five-year-old, it felt like miles from the house to the gas station, but it wasn’t. It was our drinking water, mom had a baby already and was pregnant for another child, so it was what we did.

We moved to Spafford about a year later, and instead of our walks for water,

In Spafford, Karen, Pam, Peter and me

we would sometimes walk to the “Fescos” dairy farm and get milk from there. We had these aluminum containers, they too got heavy for a now 6 and 7-year-old, but again Karen protected us, made it something that we accepted, we just knew we needed to help out that way. I can’t say how often we did that, as when dad was home, mom would try to have errands done and have us set for another week till he came home. He would be home on Thursday nights, go back out Friday and usually home on the weekends.

We were in Spafford for about 1 1/2 yrs, and we moved to our final Skaneateles house, it was on Elizabeth Street, another rental home, this one was closer to the village, so we had milk delivered by the local dairy company. We had sidewalks and Karen would walk us to the village for a movie, or to the lake or to the ice cream parlor. In this last house, Karen was now in high school, she had a boyfriend ( David) and she was still the person I admired, I cherished, I wanted to be like her. I never remember Karen as being negative. She was always warming the room with her smiles. She was so great with each of us as we continued to increase in numbers. I this last house we now had Pam and me, plus my brothers Peter and Tom, and when we were living on  Elizabeth Street Melanie was born into the family too. Needless to say, my mom always had babies and tiny ones in the first 10 yrs of my life. Karen was my rock, my light.

Karen graduated from high school and had gone into nursing school at Crouse School of nursing in Syracuse. I cherished nursing because that was what she did, and I think her compassion and her comfort to me through the years, she showed me through her actions how to want to care for people too. I knew as I continued to grow that I wanted to be a nurse like Karen.

I am sure for Karen, there were sad times, with her mom dying, and then adjusting to lifes changes when her dad married my mom. My mom told me often she wanted to be there for Karen, to be as close to her mom as she could be, that she loved Karen from the first time she met her.

Now 66 years of life later, 66 years of having Karen in my life, I have to say that I admire her as much now as I did as a small child. Her faith is amazing. Her love and devotion to her husband are deeper than words can express. Her love for each of her children, their families, her grandchildren are unending, deep, real. She loves her church family, she loves her brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, their spouses and all the children within the family units.

Sure she has had bumps along this journey of life, we all have or will have. However, not once have I not cherished her, not thought of her, not remember times with her,  she has been my anchor, my light, my sister.

She is incredible even when the odds are strong. She has fought stage 4 pancreatic cancer for 2 plus years and is now in Hospice. Even though all of this, she is able to smile, able to share moments of laughter, and moment of quiet.

I feel so fortunate for any time we share, and this past week was able to share 1 1/2 days in Niagara Falls. A place that means a lot to her and her husband Tim,  a place Mark and I love to go to too. We got to sit by the fall, to absorb the magic of the dramatic wonder of the falls. We were able to share times of quiet, times of talking, times of laughing and creating more memories that will last for a long long time.

 

 

 

 

 

So this post, this is dedicated to one incredible lady, to our sister…. Karen.                              I have lived a life that she has always been a part of, near or far, always close to my heart. With love, with gratitude, I sign off for now. Mrs. Justa alias Cindy

 

 

A Great Weekend

What a busy last few days, what a wonderful way to spend those every precious moments in life Last week we knew we were going to be blessed with Briella for 2 nights and the boys for one night. So, as a gramma, I go into my mode of thinking of ways have preparations are done for the weekend ( laundry, beds freshly made, laundry done and such,) as we love to spend time with them.

I planned meals and thought of games, and some teaching “helping gramma” time that Briella and I could do. She absolutely loves to help, loves to learn and often wants to try things that she says she knows how to do, but when offered the opportunity, she says she might not really know how to do it.

She wanted to take a picture of the sky with my phone/camera- I explained that she had to be really careful, ( as I prefer it not to be dropped in a slushed area at the park…..) once handed the phone, well she needed a lot of help understanding the pointing of the phone, but in the end, I have my first picture taken by Briella.

Not bad for a first with my phone.

Oh, we read some books, we did some floor “Swiftering” which she asks to do, we made brookies from scratch, we prepared lasagna, we did some games,                                            puzzles, and cuddling. I have to say, I enjoyed every minute.

The weekend only gets better when we add the 2 boys to it. As they totally love life too. Grandpa and the boys have a neat relationship,.They love being with Grandpa, and he with them,  and there are chess challenges, and journeys through the moments talking, playing,  teaching and learning.

Brandon had to be low key as he had hurt his ribs and side in a fall just before coming out. So he and the reclining couch and a heating pad were friends.  They watched a documentary on a submarine that was found from long ago, they talked about all kinds of things.

Brandon and I shared time with a game called pick-up-sticks. We really had fun with that. The three kids and UI did a few rounds of Old Maid. Grandpa and the boys did Sorry and Trouble a number of times and deep concentrating games of chess.  They also had CHILL time.

We try to listen to what each has to say and offer. They have such incredible minds. They are appreciative of anything done for them or with them, and each kid has their own personality and interests. There is little jealousy, and it is funny how Briella and Preston can love each other or be like oil and water. So it is a treat to be able to have them all here and to enjoy each of their many precious qualities.

It is funny how when they all left the silence is almost deafening. The hum of the washer doing the sheets, and the dog snoring next to us, those are the only sounds.

We reflect on the weekend, we are still and chill. I feel refreshed and thankful for the special times we had. A great way to start the week….

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

Not Just a Dog

I have to tell you, I feel bad for those who have never been loved by a dog, who have never loved a dog. For a good part of my life, a dog has helped to make me whole. I truly believe, in my life, no other living being has ever been as faithful, trustworthy, compassionate and loving than a dog.

I have had a number of dogs, various breeds, various sizes. Each and everyone had a personality of their own, and if given attention and watching them, their lack of words does not lessen their amount of communication. They are silly, they smile, they do strange things, they fill the heart and soul with a love that is unmeasurable and irreplaceable.

I have never 100% of the time had a person greet me at the door with so much excitement and joy. Never once was a dog sitting at the door with a scowl, or a “And where were you this late” attitude that I would get from a parent at times. I have never had a better friend, never had another show unbiased acceptance for who and what I am, never felt as whole as I have in the times shared with our dog.

A dog is there when you hurt when you are sick and when you are just being. And a dog protects those who love it, to make sure danger stays as far away as possible.

I feel bad for those people who have never shared the time with a dog. It is so easy to walk past the dog journeys on the road of life, and honestly, it leaves a person without the “inconvenience ” of having a dog. They can pound their proverbial chests and have so many reasons why they don’t like dogs, do have dogs and would never live with a dog.

A dog is not okay to be beaten or abandoned, it is not ok to lock them up and let them come out for meals, they are not JUST A DOG. If a person can not take in 100% of what a dog really offers, what a gift a dog can be, well those people should never have one.

To me, a dog is not meant to be left outside, in a caged area or tied on a chain, why would I have a dog just to make it an outside animal? Some say their dogs have thick coats and love the cold, okay– I think that perhaps those people should put on their own heavy coats and share that outside environment with that dog.

Sure you can live without a dog, and you think you aren’t missing anything because of that, unfortunately, those people will never experience the unconditional love a dog gives. They won’t know the void a dog can fill, for me…. my life has been better with a dog in it.

A dog is a responsibility, a step taken knowing there are costs for caring, feeding, and nurturing. If a person is not willing to give all the care to a dog, they should not make that step. For me, for each dog that has filled my love with so much, there is no price, no amount of money that can match how much better my life is because of them.

I also can say that when a dog has had to die, the void, the soul riping loss ( for me) has been worse than the severe feeling of loss of a loved one. With that being said, a passing of a loved one goes on and on, and it feels like the world should stop as you take it all in.

The passing of a dog, it is different. It is so heart wrenching, and it can be days to not cry at a dog commercial, or looking at a photo or belonging of the dog, yet the footprints in my soul are treasured.

 

For me, I am so thankful to have known the various dogs in my life. Each one has been inside the house, protected from the elements. Each ones short life ( compared to our lives) has given more than I could ever have given back. If you truly watch a dog, you find so many neat qualities, neat personalities, and realize why dog is God spelled backward. A dog is not “Just a dog” and more than a person is “Just a ___”

I am going to get ready to venture into work. Our dog has come in and nudged her nose on my leg to say good morning, she has had her breakfast and gone out, and now she is in sleeping with her dad, watching over him as he sleeps his last little while before araising to a new day. She reminded me how great it is to have her in our home, in our hearts, and a part of our family.

Love to all, Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

The squirrel that went for thirds

I wanted to share a captured moment, a once in a lifetime moment, that makes me laugh every single time I see it. Once upon a time, oh probably 8 years ago, we used to have a bird feeder in the back yard that was maybe 10 feet from the house. The birds loved it, and so did the chipmunks and squirrels.

We would see a few different types of birds and just 2 types of squirrels, red and grey. It was a winter we had had a lot of snow, and even though we did everything from buying a squirrel resistant feeder to adding things to make it harder, those little guys found a way to get there. This one day I had noticed the feeder getting low so we went out and filled it to the max.

I go to look out the slider to see how things are looking, and it seemed like all the food was on the ground. The squirrels had learned how to jump, hit the pole, which would shake the feeder and seeds would go flying. I see this little guy munching, stuffing his cheeks all around the newly coated ground, chomping away like crazy.

Then all of the sudden he comes up the stairs of the backslider , puts his one “hand” on the snow bank, and other on his belly and rubs his belly.

I do not know if he was thanking us, indicating he shouldn’t have gone up for thirds… or just indicating he won.

No matter what, it was funny beyond belief. Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

Quality not Quantity

I often find my mind taking me back in time, and remember that through most of the years of my life, it was the times spent with the special men in my life, not the times away from that I remember most. As a very young girl, it was my dad. He was the comfort, the strength, a gift. His job had him away during the week and home on Thurs nights and back out on a short sales run, returning usually Friday nights.

Our time together meant everything to me. I remember his hand holding mine securely, his voice was deep, his love for all of us was unending. I remember his hugs, his laughter.

He used to say I was his princess. I remember how he tried to take time for each of us. and my time I saved in a vault in my mind, in my heart. It brings me comfort in so many ways.

I remember how he was one who would remind me through the years he was alive, that life never promised to be all good, bad things happen, and that somehow the bad turns into good again.

Karen was 10 years older than me, and it is funny in the couple of pictures I have of her with me and dad, she is always looking back at me. I can only imagine I was a chatty little one.

We all remember dad in different ways I am sure. Karen was 10 when I was born, so she already had 10 years of memories before my dad times started.

Pam my next older sister was 1 1/2 yrs older than me. She and I had a lot of fun and not so fun times, just due to age, and I always felt a tad bit of jealousy from her. She too had memories of dad, and dads death took a really bad toll on her. To the point that as an adult woman, every anniversary of his death she would end up in a severe depression. Sometimes to the point of needing an inpatient admission to help her get to the other side.

As I got older, there have been men in my life who also had employment that required they be gone a good percentage of the weeks. I never ever regretted that, I accepted it without any second thought, because the time they were home, was valuable, treasured and never taken for granted. It is not the amount of time spent, it is how we use the time when we have it to spend. To be constantly together, 24/7; I think it becomes an expectation, I think there are moments that would be more special if they were not routine.

During the first 10 years of my life, I remember my mom, however times I remember more vividly are those in which my mom and dad were there. I wonder often how life would have been had he not died when I was 10. Time with dad, it was quality time, the pieces fit together.

As I look back on my own adult life, Mark was away often for his job, just like my dad was. It was how life was. When our own kids were growing up- we tried to spend quality time with them when Mark was home. We would go to some places – often places that did not cost a penny, yet their value priceless. Walks in parks, sitting on docks, camping in our pup tents, later advancing to pop-ups. Playing ball, frisbee, Yahtzee, the list goes on.

And now the times with our grandchildren, the moments are treasured, they are not routine, and we do things with them. It is the special times, times giving of oneself and really focusing on the other person, those are quality times.

AS I am off for a new week, I am going to work on quality and not quantity…

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Trusting In …..

We live life sometimes feeling like we know exactly the next step. Our alarm clock will go off, we will get up, we brush our teeth, do whatever routine in the morning we do, and move to the next part of our day. However when the alarm clock does not go off, or there is no water pressure, or maybe we fall out of bed instead of getting up the usual way, well it kinda puts our synched life out of order.

We trust everything will go as planned, and yet there are the things that don’t.

It gets even trickier when we take the next step, drive the car, reach for something, heck even getting something from a cupboard. Everything we do we trust will end the same way.

Now we can try to protect ourselves from areas where things can’t go wrong, but we become people in bubbles. Less can go wrong, but things happen.

I was thinking about trust and faith to extend beyond the simpler bullet points of a day. I was reminded in my thoughts of this day, this fall day when this never could have been, had life been kept inside the bubble. I took this at an angle to show the freedom, the joy of the moment. Jeff trusted he would get caught, and he loved the feeling of freedom. The look on his face, the total relaxation of his body, he trusted thigs will be okay, and without that trust, the picture would have been totally different- it might have been a terrified face and fingers clutching so tight to the neck of his dad- like please don’t make me do this. But no– he totally trusted and because of that experienced something way out of the ordinary.

As we get older and heavier, that opportunity – that specific scenario – could not be, or would probably not end in a laugh. However, as we age, inventors have created ways to get that feeling and beyond. I takes a lot more effort from the person achieving the liftoff, however, it needs to be accompanied by trust. Trust that the winds are right, trust your legs are ready for a rather fast run, trust the equipment was not faulty. If however, you have the trust, that sense of freedom can be yours. This person was on an elevated area, beyond the takeoff area was an incredible valley, miles of land colored with the brilliance of fall.

Life has been full of trusting, we trust in relationships, we trust in our day to day activities, our jobs, our everything……and yes we also trust we will be cleaning the bruises- whether inside or outside, and some scars that show the roadmap of my life. I want to always feel that feeling that life is going to be okay, that feeling I get every time I remember that fall day with Jeff. I never ever want to stop trusting that even when things don’t go quite as planned, the trust and faith are so important.

Until later,  Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Planning Sometimes Is Just That

As we go through life we plan for things. We plan for trips or places to live. We plan for futures, and we plan for retirement.

As I sat in a local diner tonight with my husband, our table was in the center. Around us were other table and booths lined the walls. It seemed to be mostly patrons who were well known, and who seemed to be much older then we are. It felt as if we were in a dinner theater in the round. With the play being skits of people lives. People came in and left, waitresses cleared the tables, kind of like at a play when the light get turned down, the curtain falls, and another scene comes to be.

I felt surrounded by people who probably had made plans for their lives, and probably health reasons and life setbacks, well they changed their plans. As one man had come in with his wife, he was trying to move into the booth, his left side was not coordinated and weak, so as he slid in it was like his right side was pushing the left side in. He said to her, can you believe this is how we ended up, as she tried to help him get situated. Plans can get washed away, or reshaped. We can endure or let them take control of us .

Couples here and there, obviously some with significant health challenges, none who appeared they could be north-south travelers. It made me wonder what does the future look like? No one knows. The best plans can be dissolved in a moments notice. I think we have to accept that just because we plan it to be a certain way, that does not mean it will be. The sun rises and sets, and we have no idea what is next.

As we went to leave, a man was walking out in front of us. He had been joking with the waitresses, he had a nonstressed face, he needed a cane, his stride was not fast, but gingerly. He told us he was 91, he came there every night for dinner, he said he lives alone. He loves to talk with the gals and seems to look forward to coming there. We complimented his outlook on life, and he said he lives life lightly, doesn’t have his head down, he looks up all the time. He did not talk about heartbreak, but I sure he has had some. He displayed a love for what life offers him a minute at a time. Appreciating each sunrise and sunset.

I think that is how we need to be. We can plan, and realize those plans can change in a heartbeat. It is hard enough to plan for the next few days or weeks, let alone the future of life.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Another of Life Situations #??!!

How we handle situations is our choice. We can get really frustrated, or take a deep breath, and realize it is the way it is, and react in the most positive way possible. Now the most positive way just brings the reaction a tad away from sometimes screaming, wanting to stomp our feet or saying things we did not want to say.

Today I took a 1/2 day off. The temperature was going to be in the 50s, and we wanted to bring a few things to a very special person, a surprise of sorts. We are about an hour into the trip and Mark and I were both thinking the same thing—- we put the things in a gift bag, but it has a Christmas theme… what if we take those special items out of the gift bag, and transfer them to a regular canvas bag, so as not to give the impression it was for Christmas, avoiding the awkward feelings of them not having something for us… .

See years ago we had stopped buying adult friends and each other Christmas gifts because we and basically every adult we knew got things they wanted and needed throughout the year. The pressure and stress of making sure that we got the right gift, of not forgetting someone, getting something the other wanted,  worrying that the other didn’t spend more, feeling flustered over what they wanted- it became the focus instead of what Christmas is about. So the gifts, well we get special gifts for the kids.

Other than that, we really do not exchange gifts except 🙂 at the Christmas Eve gathering at my brother and his wife’s home. They graciously have a Christmas Eve stroganoff family gathering and all adults and teens get a $20.00 gift. It is a $20.00 gift that goes under the tree. No labeling. It is meant to be a gift that is serious not a gag gift. And something that if you got it back- well you would love it. We all draw numbers, and each person will take a gift starting at the poor sucker who is number one. As each person opens the gift they chose, they can look around at already opened gifts and swap with someone who already opened a gift. So theoretically that number one person does not want to get attached to the gift they opened because it could get taken from you, and then the next person down who opens a gift might want the gift poor number one got in the last swap. Being these are the only gifts we get, we really like the thoughtfulness that goes into the gift someone else put into their purchase.

So back to today…. we wanted to take advantage of the warm weather and bring these things to her. We stopped 1/2 way there, we grab one of our canvas bags, and go to do the switch, only to realize, we have the wrong bag. At first, I am thinking we could turn around, and add another 2 hrs to this venture, that thought went before I even said it. Then I was really upset with me because I was who took the one gift bag and put it by the door to make sure we remembered it.

I looked at Mark, anticipating his disappointment but instead, he said well, I guess we’ll have to go back another time. Then we were thinking that we can just mail them. He tried to comfort me, he did not display anger or disappointment, ( even if he felt like it cuz I know I did ) he could tell I was bumming big time, and he said it will be fine.

Now as we continued our venture, I begin to get out of the moment and into the future. THANK GOD we decided to stop, intending to move the gifts to the canvas bag. Crap can you imagine the scenario if she had been handed this bag, took out the gift, and I am thinking holy crap, what would our expressions have been? How awkward, ya can’t tell a person that it really wasn’t for them, or laugh it off and take it back….and it was not something that would have even been meant for her. I am sure graciously she might have said- ” Oh thank you” or “oh you shouldn’t have” with a kind of questioning tone and wondering what were we thinking.!!! So as we proceeded down the highway, we had a nice visit, and well the things we have, we can get to her later.

The gift that almost wasn’t, is in the car, and I truly believe that had a dab of spiritual intervention. The scenarios of how it could have been are laughable now… it was a nice drive down, a nice visit, and the gift that almost wasn’t- well it still is…

I hope you find the holiday season memorable, enjoy the people, the laughter and take time to remember what Christmas is about.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Interacting and Technology

So as I was making my weekly grocery list on a pad of real paper, with an actual pen, I was thinking- hey I could just go online, and order this all.. and …. nope— STOP…. I am going to continue to go out and shop for groceries. I enjoy seeing others, I enjoy making sure what we are buying is what we intended to buy, …

Well, this got me thinking… I think as the world continues to advance, to become more virtual, we have to remember to have real-life experiences. We need to interact with face to face, real life, and reach out and touch moments.

To see peoples face on face time is a great tool, because people can be in places you can not be, and have a conversation with them. However, doing face time with people that are just a few miles away, well I feel that going outside and seeing them might be the option to take.

We can now go to our computer, cell phone, tablet or probably talk in the air to “Alexa” or “Google” devices, give a list of things we need from the store, and have it delivered to our doorstep, or have someone waiting to load it in our car.

Instead of face to face, touch the items, one can buy virtually anything without going out and seeing it. And God forbid it not be what we expected from the image online we ordered it from. Instead, had we just gone to a local vendor, a store, a warehouse and seen it, felt it, looked it over, well then we know what we are buying.

Now everyone ( including me) can make all the excuses and reasons why this is so great. It keeps me away from germs of others, I do not need to deal with long lines, it gives me more time to fill up my day with a bunch of other stuff. Heck before we know it we have fit what used to be 36 hrs of actions in an 18 hr day.

We do not have to go to a movie- nope we can sit in the comfort of our home and watch the movie, stop it when we want, and put it back on after we pee, or grab a drink, or stretch, AND we can watch it in our jammies. Now I am not saying this is wrong, it does, however, take away the “going out to a move” experience. The smell of the popcorn, the darkness as you sit on seats in rows that are on an inclining floor.

There is nothing that replaces taking a trip to a planetarium. The music, the narrator, the feeling you are in a spaceship in orbit as they show us the universe, the night sky.

To show a child a firefly cupped in your hand, or to show them virtually via a YouTube image– well the magic is definitely in the first option.

 

Playing games, yes real hands-on , touch the pieces, not only hear the voice of your opponent but to see their eyes, to laugh in the same room, that is so much a component of that experience. Oh I know we can get games and our opponent is part of the game, we had this one game where we could choose the country and type of opponent we wanted. A man calling you “Chap” to a down-under voice teasing when they are about to whomp you. It, however, takes away the real socialization.

Virtual convenience is nice, however, we as adults, our kids, our grandkids, our friends, we also need to keep our social skills up, we need to take advantage of the value of being real- in real time… to be able to interact and not feel lost in the world.

We can in balance embrace the various incredible things that are available to us, things to make our life easier… yet we need to be aware of what is important at the end of the day, what is a need, what are we doing as a “cop-out” or because it is just less demanding of our time… and what is a want.

Thoughts to ponder…. Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

 

So Nice To Spend Time Together

Well, the weekend is over and a new week begins. The dinner at Jeff and Amanda’s was the icing on the proverbial cake. It brought together Our kids , their spouses, and our kid’s kids. It happens too infrequently, it is nice when it does happen.

It brings to mind the importance of stopping for a bit. We have all gone in various directions in our lives, our grandchildren have different interests and our responsibilities keep us all going in different directions, that it is nice to stop and have all our various pathways intersect, our universes align.

At times there was more than one conversation, and the cousins laughing and having a great time, kids being kids. Life, I am so often reminded about life is what we make it to be. There are times and situations that we have no control over, and those times, well we do the best we can.

As we sat there conversing, sharing where we are in life, our days, our current events, experiences. it really is amazing all the experiences the grandchildren have had, that our kid’s families have had. Places they have been and plan to go. How each adult is very responsible, very respectable, they love one another and all love their kids immensely. As a parent ( grandparent) – I can not ask for anything more.

The 5 kids running, talking, laughing in the background took me back in time, memories of growing up in a house with 6 of kids, it brought a sense of comfort and many many memories. The sounds were what our house sounded like every single night, every weekend, every summer day and night whenever we were all in the house. It is the building blocks that create each of us. The noise of youth, noise that is there – no internet needed, no electronics, noise that is a sharing of each other. My mom would say she loved the sounds in the house, it was the sound of life. Oh at times she would get frustrated with the energy of the six of us I am sure.

When we went to bed, drifting off to sleep to the sound of the whistling tea kettle, we knew mom was getting ready  to unwind, to focus on her stuff, for she also she loved the quiet- a time she knew everyone was safe, comfortable and resting, charging up for another day of running, laughing, talking, creating and even a few arguments along the way.

It was nice to go back in time, and comforting to know that each of us is doing ok, in our own way, in our own lives. Until the next time we gather together, I will keep close the memories of today.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Treasuring minutes,making them count

The holidays are in full swing right now. People going totally bonkers shopping here and there and buying baked goods and gifts and this and that. We had some shopping to do and I totally dreaded the thought of Saturday, 2 weekends left before Christmas and the crowds.

So we hit the stores by 8 AM. yep smartest move of the day. We did not have a lot to get, I had baking to do- I wanted to make some special things for a special time tomorrow.  The goal was to be home and baking while people are out there fighting for parking spaces, and huffing and puffing in line because they are being inconvenienced by waiting in line, yep- got home before the shoppers had their first cup of coffee.

We even finished our journey with a coffee and Dunkin, and some relax time before heading home.  Then the fun times began. This is the end result of my first of 4 treats…. mixing ingredients together and grating apples up, and poof apple muffins about to bake.

While these were baking I started project number 2- making an apple strawberry pie for us to cut into small pieces and freeze, taking one out every once in a while for a small treat. That went in the over when the muffins came out.

While that was baking it was time to make cinnamon donuts and donut holes. I bag each separately and put them in the freezer for a treat. Mark likes to get one for a breakfast type item with his AM cup of coffee.

As the donuts were cooling before their deep freeze, I took the apple muffins and kept some out for tomorrow and the rest individually frozen for sometime in the future.

Last but not least the pie came out and in went a dump cake to cook to a yummy delight. – that too for tomorrow. Finally after hours and hours of shuffling, and mixing and cooking ta da……. ( The pie has “I LOVE YOU” on it, but it is hard to read. )

The dump cake and plate of muffins all set to go over to our special treat.

Tomorrow Adrianne and Josh, Caleb and Mackenzie are coming to Phoenix for a family dinner at Amanda and Jeffs and their 3 kids.

I am looking forward to having everyone in the same place. Adrianne and Jeff have been brother and sister since they were 3. Lots of years have gone by since then, and Mark and I both tried very hard to have them always feel like they were brother and sister.

I always loved this picture, because it is one of many that shows what I mean.

This was at a pool at a campsite that used to be near here- it is now closed …. Yep, we tried to make weekends special…. we had a pop-up camper and would take them camping on weekends when our schedules allowed. Sometimes it seems like just yesterday, but it was a while ago.

So tomorrow we once again will all be together. The time will be way too fast, and all way special. Life is short, we have one chance at each minute. and tomorrow, I am going to try to make every minute a treasure. Whatever you finish your weekend with, I hope you too treasure the gift each minute is.

Until later… Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

It is What’s Inside That Counts

This is a lesson in life that is learned and relearned and relearned again. As we grow up, we are impressed by and exposed to many people, places, events, and experiences. I remember many a time wishing I was more like another or thinking how come they have such and such, or they wear such and such.
The pressures of being feeling you are welcome or trying to be accepted, they can be overwhelming. In growing up that seemed important at times, and also seemed to not be a pathway I was on as far as it went with the “cool kids”.
I remember my mom on more than a few occasions reminding me that it is what is on the inside that counts. I may not be the best dressed, the prettiest, the richest, the most popular as I walk through life. Those things are not what is important. It is how you act, how sincere you are, how empathetic you are, how caring you are, how honest you are. Those are the qualities that make you a person others will want to know, those are the qualities of a true friend.
Material things seem to matter to many people, the best car, the most souped-up technologies, the fanciest name on the clothes … in the end- what really mattered was who we each are. Not what we have. The stores, the commercials, the internet is filled with so many THINGS to get that “special person to show them you care”. That does not show a person you care, spending time, listening, give and take conversations, that is how someone knows you care about them.

 

Have you ever known of a person who you thought was someone you wanted to know better until they opened their mouth and you realized they are extremely focused on themselves? Or wished for that certain something, only to find it was not worth the effort of getting it.

I knew a person once a LONGGG time ago who had to look in every reflection at himself. I kid you not, I think he liked when it was early morning or dusk because all the windows became mirrors.
There are so many things in life that if we determine it by its cover, by its appearance alone, we just might be focusing on something with no depth, without substance. Life is too short to be artificial.

As we raise our kids, as we mentor others, as we present ourselves to others, we need to remember it is not just what is seen, it is all those special things, it is what is beyond what is seen that matters. What can we share of us, not what can we buy, but what can we offer from our hearts to others?

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Responsibility

 

Another day is dawning,  memories to be made, impressions to leave, moments unchangeable.

As the day begins, as the next step is about to happen, the next minute here among us, I am thinking about life and the effects we have on it.

 

RESPONSIBILITY:  We all are responsible for our actions. This goes for every single thing we do. We can not choose which things we do we are and are not responsible for. Nope, we own each thing we do.

That is a huge responsibility. Why, because sometimes the things we do, we don’t even realize or think about the end result, we get wrapped up in a moment or jump on the proverbial “bandwagon”. However, as we travel down the twists and turns of life’s journey,  and at the end of our road in life, it is us and us alone who individually made choices.

I say this because of many reasons, many reasons I myself have chosen to do things, and once they were done, well there was no rewind, no “gee I didn’t mean to be that way, or “I didn’t mean to do that” or “I didn’t mean to _______”.  The “I wish I had” thoughts do not count.

There have been things I have said, I can not take back. Actions I did, I can not undo. As a nurse, I have cared for patients who would say, “I knew better” or “If I only had never smoked” or “I took the chance ____”   Notice the similarity– “If I only had not or didn’t”

My parents would say to me when I did something I totally should not have, “You know better than that” or ” Bet you won’t do that again” or “what did you learn from that?”. And as I was growing up, she would wipe the wound ( physical or not) and guide me through the why’s and maybe even have suggestions on how to deal with that scenario in the future. They were preparing me for my future.

As we grow up we are still responsible for our actions. There are consequences to what is done, said, or ignored. If any of us are asked to do something and we say we will, if we then do it halfway, or not appropriately – if we take a risk, a dare—- we cannot go back and get those minutes to undo it.

In our roles in life, ( being a friend, an adult, a mentor, a stranger, a human being ) whether at work or in any environment around us, writing anything in social media, in an article,  we can not take it back. It paints a picture of us that can not be painted over, the “delete” does not remove words or photos or actions done.

Our reactions to something said or done, we can not undo that either. In life I have found to tread softly at times, to think before doing or saying, and to appreciate and take responsibility to every minute I am on this earth.

What image are we giving? What actions are we doing? What consequences because of those actions, or lack of actions are there? What image have I left?

Those are my thoughts this morning, something I will remember as I get ready for another day to be the best I can be.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Christmas Season

I can not totally pinpoint every reason I love the Christmas season. It was never for gifts, as I have never been in a place where material things were the focus of why one lives and breaths. Growing up Christmas Season seemed to begin right after Thanksgiving. Now it is starting before Halloween, but I think the retailers feel it is necessary to have pre-pre Black Friday specials, and all kinds of sales before Thanksgiving groceries are even being thought of because the stores need people to come to them.

To totally experience the Christmas Season and the things I notice as being comforting, well you can not experience that using your app to online stores and sitting on the couch in your feety PJS. Nope, you have to get dressed and go out in the world.

First I love going around and seeing the various light displays. In w world where people seem to be mostly to themselves,

I find it neat when they open up their lives to others through lights. There are some people who really go nuts with lights, one place not terribly far from here they have collection bins for non-perishable food for the hungry, and thousands of people come by their place to witness the Christmas show. They must really love the season, and they do an incredible job of displaying it. And in exchange, they provide food for those who need it.

Others have quaint light, it really does not matter how massive it is, it is just neat to get a feeling of unity, or giving, sharing. We have downsized our Christmas decorations- we never did a lot outside, but we used to have more lights in windows and a whomping tall tree. Now, the quaintness feels so good to us.

These guys used to be anchored outside, tied down and rocks in their feet area, and they still would tip at times. We had them outside when Jeff was in school and living home. AS he grew up and moved out and on with life, well he and his wife and children, they have the decorations and bigger trees. Kids love the magic of the season too. For us, it is playing some Christmas music, and decorating some.

We do not go out to the incredible sales, as we really do not buy a lot of gifts, and have no lists we are trying to fill. So for me, when we are in any stores, or walking down a sidewalk, well people seem happier this time of year, friendlier, more welcoming. It is what I feel at this time of year.

When we were younger, there was a Sears Christmas catalog that would come to the house. We were allowed to all share it and pick ONE thing we really thought was special or something we longed for. We would put the first letter of our name by the picture. If it was for the two with M starting their name- we would do a “Me” or a “Ma”. If money allowed- that one special gift became a reality under the tree. That is hard for a kid to do, to pick one item in a catalog designed to become a “ME ME ME” type advertising plot. One year Tom succumbed to the advertising wonderland and put a whole bunch of “t”s next to pictures/ but every night he would lay on his belly in bed and recite over and over again as he bopped his head up and down on his pillow ” MOTORIFIC TORTURE TRACK” HA, he did end up with this as his main gift. Peter was relieved because they had bunk beds, Pete on the lower bunk, and Tom doing his monotonous chant every night till he put himself to sleep.

I find that Christmas is more enlightening when it is cherished for what it is and not filled with what to buy, and how much did so and so spend, and wondering if you need to get a person a gift just in case they have one for you.

Yep, this is the season I really feel the peace, the love, in the places I go.

May you find some of that peace where you are too.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy.

 

 

 

 

When the pieces all fit in place.

I love when things come together, when all the elements of what could be, with the potential of it turning out good, or not so good and after all is said and done- well it came out to be okay.

This past weekend was just like that for me ( well for all of us I hope). We had the fortune to have my sister and her husband here for 5 days, and 3 of our grandchildren here for an overnight and a full day, and a family gathering on Saturday at our sons home, and my friend from High School here for Thanksgiving day.

I mentioned in the last post that our weekend was coming to an end. Well, now it is totally in the rear view mirror of life. The kids are back with their parents, the gatherings have all come and gone, my sister, her husband and my friend from high school have all made it home safely, and Mark and I are here with Riley. We have gone from a lot of actions to settling back down to the normal life we have.

It was fun, it was interesting at times, the kids were unbelievably great, we laughed, we played, we learned new games, we shared ideas…… we got to share family time at Jeff and Amanda’s with my siblings and their families members who could attend. Times when I wasn’t sure that things would go smoothly ( specifically the cooking of the Thanksgiving Dinner- that is always a crap-shoot because the Turkey rules- yep — dinner is not ready till the turkey is). All in all, though it went well.  Lessons learned include: cooking a boneless 3 lb turkey breast in a crockpot is awesome;  and pre-cooking the stuffing, sweet potatoes and pies worked very well.

As the dust settles, all the laundry is done and put away, the spare beds tucked away and folded chairs back in the storage area- I can head into the Christmas mode.

I hope you find magic as the days of December come and go.

Until later- Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

“I Already Know”

I guess I never thought about this until I heard it a whole bunch of times in different settings this Thanksgiving weekend.

I saw myself doing it, and also heard it done to others. First, let me say all the social media outlets CAN BE wonderful when used as a means to give many “friends, family and acquaintances” the same bullet point information at one time. A way to create a page not yet colored in that person’s life.

Let’s say you graduated or had a baby or an exciting time at _______,  it is to share an extremely tough time or the passing of a person that you would never have known about, or a way to type in a verse or 2 about the loss you have endured. It is something, some time had it not been shared on f.b., twitter, or any of the others outlets to communicate.

It is a great way to share photos of a gathering many attended, or maybe that perfect moment you stumbled on. Those times when without sharing on social media, well it would never have been experienced in a very 2D way.

Looking at this picture- one that was probably on a facebook post, it shows a wedding, but without the personal touch, the conversation, the painting done with words, there is so much more that can fill in the outline of a “wedding”

If, however, someone starts face to face- or voice to voice on the phone- about something- well that is the beginning of an opportunity to converse. They want to make that 2D, quick blurb into a 3D moment. Voices, faces they add expression to the time they are referring to, or to the sad or happy moment captured and shared. That person wanted to put color into the social media bullet point. We ( and I can not count the times I did it) can stop the conversation, we can keep that moment just a bullet point in time, we can portrait we do not really care by interrupting- or making our first ( and often our last) response by saying ” Yeah , I already know” or “Yeah,I saw it on f.b.” .

Now if the same person starts the conversation and mentions they also had it on Facebook, ( or whatever media they put it on) we need to stop and listen. That conversation you are about to be blessed with, well it adds the personal component.

Or if you see that person, you could always start the conversation with that tidbit of their life they shared. An opportunity to bring a personal touch to a moment they shared on facebook. That can be a great time to show you care and want to hear more.

We will never ever know what we missed if we close that opportunity to have color added to social media bullet points if we stop the conversation before the colors fill in the moment in their life.

My mission for today and going forward is to let the other person not only bring up the topic but to let them take that outline, that bullet point, and add their words to it, their nonverbals, their feelings.

Until later, Mrs. Justa/ alias Cindy