A Date Night To Remember

The longer Mark and I have been together, the less times we refer to a journey here or there as a date night. BUT last weekend, Memorial Weekend… we went on a date night.

It was kinda neat to think we labeled this adventure as a date night, a couple who have been together for 37 yrs almost, but never the less it was our next in a rather long line of ” Mark and Cindys Excellent Adventures”

We were going to the Drive In- yep just like old times, a coolish night, a movie on a big screen with the sounds echoing through the air and car.

We decided to head over with over with an hour and a 1/2 to spare, so that we could avoid long lines getting into see the movie. So we got comfortable clothes for a possible 54 degree evening and off we went. It was a little different than what I had remembered before. Oh there were different groups of people playing frisbee and catch, just like I had remembered from going early to drive ins years ago, but what seemed a tad strange to me was there seemed to be more people parking backwards, and more people setting up lounge chairs and blankets, and settling in for the movie.

Another thing I had noticed were no speakers, yeah that was a tad different. Back in the day….. there were bulky type metal speakers that were on post. A car on each side of the poles and the speaker hooked onto the drivers window. Now only the poles the speakers used to be on So we acclimated ourselves to the NEW WORLD way. We found out that there was a set FM frequency that was used to send the sound through your car radio. There was a upbeat sounding guy on the sound system explaining that all you had to do was leave your car in accessory mode for the movie, tune your radio to a certain set frequency and not to fret, it shouldn’t run your battery down, but just in case, they had helpers to jump start your car.

So all is good, yep this will be fine. We went to the snack bar, ordered a sandwich and drink, and got ready for our date night. Top gun Maverick was ready to begin. Our windows up, our car in accessory mode, the radio set and volume just right and we were ready to watch the movie that was being spoken about as awesome.

Just before the movie started the the upbeat announcer was again assuring all that accessory mode is the way to go, he added a little additional information. He said the movies are about to begin. From now on, no headlights, brake lights while the movie is going, and when you do leave, do not tap your brakes, leave headlights off, please leave your parking lights on until you totally exit the drive in area. GOT IT !

So the movie starts, our radio in the car is set, we are ready to soar the skies with Tom Cruise. It all seemed to be going well, until………. 1 hr and 15 minutes into the movie our dome lights light up, the car goes out of accessory mode , our driving lights automatically come on and we are there like an unwelcome beacon in the night. Unfortunately I only have two hands, and we have 3 VERY BRIGHT dome lights glaring in the car.

Now what do we do? We can’t shut off the driving lights, the dome lights were brighter than 3 spot lights, people were looking over from the car next to us, the car is off, and no accessory mode. We had no idea what to do. Now being a newer keyless car, the only way to start it is with the brake on. We can’t open our doors, because the driving lights change to head lights to show you the way into the darkness when you get home…….So Mark and I decide that this was a good time to leave, as we couldn’t hear the movie, we were lighting up the place, and lets just say it was no longer the neat date night.

So he put his foot on the brake to start the car, and boy were they bright !!!( it was slow to start !!) and off we went. We did laugh all the way home about what a strange date night that was… the old folks night out on the town !

Needless to say, now I know why people were sitting outside their cars, as they must have brought FM radios, boom boxes, or small portable radios to get the sound from. That will be our next additional item should we dare try that again.

Yep, just another chapter in “Mark and Cindy’s Excellent Adventures” . Ya gotta love it.

Until late, Mrs Justa ..alias CIndy

 

Planning Sometimes Is Just That

As we go through life we plan for things. We plan for trips or places to live. We plan for futures, and we plan for retirement.

As I sat in a local diner tonight with my husband, our table was in the center. Around us were other table and booths lined the walls. It seemed to be mostly patrons who were well known, and who seemed to be much older then we are. It felt as if we were in a dinner theater in the round. With the play being skits of people lives. People came in and left, waitresses cleared the tables, kind of like at a play when the light get turned down, the curtain falls, and another scene comes to be.

I felt surrounded by people who probably had made plans for their lives, and probably health reasons and life setbacks, well they changed their plans. As one man had come in with his wife, he was trying to move into the booth, his left side was not coordinated and weak, so as he slid in it was like his right side was pushing the left side in. He said to her, can you believe this is how we ended up, as she tried to help him get situated. Plans can get washed away, or reshaped. We can endure or let them take control of us .

Couples here and there, obviously some with significant health challenges, none who appeared they could be north-south travelers. It made me wonder what does the future look like? No one knows. The best plans can be dissolved in a moments notice. I think we have to accept that just because we plan it to be a certain way, that does not mean it will be. The sun rises and sets, and we have no idea what is next.

As we went to leave, a man was walking out in front of us. He had been joking with the waitresses, he had a nonstressed face, he needed a cane, his stride was not fast, but gingerly. He told us he was 91, he came there every night for dinner, he said he lives alone. He loves to talk with the gals and seems to look forward to coming there. We complimented his outlook on life, and he said he lives life lightly, doesn’t have his head down, he looks up all the time. He did not talk about heartbreak, but I sure he has had some. He displayed a love for what life offers him a minute at a time. Appreciating each sunrise and sunset.

I think that is how we need to be. We can plan, and realize those plans can change in a heartbeat. It is hard enough to plan for the next few days or weeks, let alone the future of life.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Another Year In The Rear View Mirror

Today marks yet another year of life. The moments are but footprints, soon to be washed away, yet leaving impressions in our memory banks. A year of hopefully some positive that happened, a year for some filled with one or more life-changing moments, and a year that some may want to run out of as quickly as possible.

I have a friend who married a man that is her soul mate. I mean to the max. The love you see in their eyes when she talks about him- about them- in their interactions captured on photos, it has been a truly blessed year for her.

I have a friend, she is a soulmate friend, we think alike, we just know when the other needs a call, a text, a visit, we say the same things, .. well she and her husband retired. They totally changed their living situation, sold a home, bought a place in Florida and have a permanent park setting on a lake in Upstate New York… Part of her time south, part up here. Oh, they had some major bumps along the journey, but all in all, looking at their smiles and stress-free facial expressions, it has been a good year for them.

Mark’s and my year, whoa, we look in the rearview mirror of that, and it has been full. We started the year with a 6-month mania for Mark, the incredible changes in our lives during that time and the challenges for him to face the 4 1/2 months of climbing out of depression. I experienced changing my department at work in August due to my place of employment being acquired by a very large company and learning oh so many new things. It is a good thing, just a big change. We spent some fun rewarding times with the grandkids and spent some great times with family. We helped Marks mom as she transitioned from an apartment to an Assisted Living Environment. Yes, it has been a year.

I think about life, each breath, each step, each second is like a snowflake. By itself, it may not mean much, but add them together and it creates memories, it creates opportunities. And as quickly as a snowflake can melt, so can the moment be gone. I look back on the year and think of all the things different, of the few more aches that might be there at times, and I wonder what lies ahead.

I long to treasure each moment, to look for the good in everything, and to be the best I can be.  I am thankful for what has been and what is yet to come. I realize that life is full of changes, of hurt and of happiness. I feel blessed that I am aware of the presence of those who have passed on still being here for me in their subtle ways. I feel thankful to have been blessed with my husband, our kids, and our grandkids. I am thankful for my siblings and all the members of our family, my friends, the church I attend and thankful for living my life in the comfort of God.

As I look ahead, I do not know what each day will bring, but each breath I take, each step I make will be with the intent to be the best I can be for that moment.  The saying “moss won’t grow on a rolling stone” will continue to be a reminder to keep moving…  So as I end this year with this post, I wish all have time to reflect, to look ahead. Happy New Year. Until next year, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

It is What’s Inside That Counts

This is a lesson in life that is learned and relearned and relearned again. As we grow up, we are impressed by and exposed to many people, places, events, and experiences. I remember many a time wishing I was more like another or thinking how come they have such and such, or they wear such and such.
The pressures of being feeling you are welcome or trying to be accepted, they can be overwhelming. In growing up that seemed important at times, and also seemed to not be a pathway I was on as far as it went with the “cool kids”.
I remember my mom on more than a few occasions reminding me that it is what is on the inside that counts. I may not be the best dressed, the prettiest, the richest, the most popular as I walk through life. Those things are not what is important. It is how you act, how sincere you are, how empathetic you are, how caring you are, how honest you are. Those are the qualities that make you a person others will want to know, those are the qualities of a true friend.
Material things seem to matter to many people, the best car, the most souped-up technologies, the fanciest name on the clothes … in the end- what really mattered was who we each are. Not what we have. The stores, the commercials, the internet is filled with so many THINGS to get that “special person to show them you care”. That does not show a person you care, spending time, listening, give and take conversations, that is how someone knows you care about them.

 

Have you ever known of a person who you thought was someone you wanted to know better until they opened their mouth and you realized they are extremely focused on themselves? Or wished for that certain something, only to find it was not worth the effort of getting it.

I knew a person once a LONGGG time ago who had to look in every reflection at himself. I kid you not, I think he liked when it was early morning or dusk because all the windows became mirrors.
There are so many things in life that if we determine it by its cover, by its appearance alone, we just might be focusing on something with no depth, without substance. Life is too short to be artificial.

As we raise our kids, as we mentor others, as we present ourselves to others, we need to remember it is not just what is seen, it is all those special things, it is what is beyond what is seen that matters. What can we share of us, not what can we buy, but what can we offer from our hearts to others?

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Challenges or a Way Of Life

On any given day, I can look out the window and think “Oh look, the sun is up”…. period… But no- there is more… see beyond the noticing of the sunrise in the quiet of things in front of me was a glistening world of diamond-like sparkles. A cold crisp early morning gift, a gift that many may have not seen, a gift that can turn into a snowy plain ol day.

 

 

 

 

Yet, right there for all to see, a refreshing light show of sparkling colors.

It brought once again to mind thought about life. How when we are faced with things that seem monumental, we look at the proverbial mountain ( or in this case maybe a quick noticing the sun is rising) and we are overwhelmed at the tasks at hand at the end of a particular journey. Sometimes it is easier to dwell on that obstacle, which takes us longer to put it behind us.

Life can feel like it is hard at times, life is full of mountains to climb, sometimes valleys to drudge through. Plenty of times I have slipped on the proverbial mountain wandered off the proverbial path and had to retrace my steps, maybe find a slightly less challenging path to go on.

There was one person in my life that told me once she never had challenges in life. I remember thinking “heck let me share some with you” but I did not offer, and she never asked to take a few from me, so I have gone on in life realizing that at least for me, challenges exist, they can be heart wrenching, they can be touch and we conquer them one by one step at a time.

Photo by Alex Smith on Pexels.com

As I look back at this person who said this to me, as I came to know her a tad bit more many yrs ago, I now wonder- maybe just maybe she had the ability to look at those diamond-like crystals, and not just at that sunrise from afar. I think that because I truly believe we ALL face moments when life has tried to knock us down.

Maybe this person was able to anticipate but not look for that next roadblock or detour on her journey of life. If we know that challenges will lie ahead, but if we look at them as not roadblocks but the way the path takes us, then maybe we too can feel that life has been good, no matter what part of our journey we are on.

I, myself, and going to try to work on this. As I take each next step on this road of life, I will anticipate some bumps and hairpin curves, knowing the road will straighten up. To now look so far ahead, but to look at now and a few feet ahead. Not so much only living for today,, but planning for tomorrow and in those plans, the “challenges” will become part of the process.

OK, I am off to try this out, Until alter… Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

“Times of our Lives”

There was a very popular song from the mid-1970s that Paul Anka had done and Kodak used it as an advertising jingle. The lyrics are very meaningful to me- and as I take photographs and look at photos from times gone by, as I reminisce on times captured in the Windows or my mind and heart, well this melody and its’  words- it plays in my head.

“Good morning, yesterday
You wake up and time has slipped away
And suddenly it’s hard to find
The memories you left behind
Remember, do you remember?

The laughter and the tears
The shadows of misty yesteryears
The good times and the bad you’ve seen
And all the others in between
Remember, do you remember
The times of your life? ………..

Reach out for the joy and the sorrow
Put them away in your mind
The memories are times that you borrow
To spend when you get to tomorrow

The seasons are passing one by one
So gather moments while you may
Collect the dreams you dream today
…….. will you remember
The times of your life?

……….
Do you remember the times of your life?”

For me, as this weekend with family enters its last day and a half, the moments already created and those yet to come, I want to remember the laughter, the realization that we were all placed in the places we are now, because of the roads we have traveled. My wish is that everyone has those moments, those “TImes of Your Life”, that can play over and over again as the days become moments in our journey, little monuments or landscapes.

Until later, Mrs. Justa alias Cindy

 

Practice creates ……

I was thinking this past week about learning something new or doing something repetitively and what is the end result.

Last weekend, we had the Black Belt Ceremony I mentioned a few posts back. Those individuals did not just wake up one morning and poof could work in synchronization with a stage full of other, they couldn’t make those moves and stay focused just by thinking about it.

This thought surfaces a lot to me. Everywhere we go, what we see, our jobs, our walking, driving, interactions, those improve often by doing them over and over again. This becomes even deeper of a thought when we get into every day.

I was reminded the other day of our day to day life. While I was in a waiting room, I overheard a person say on her cell phone that she prefers to text people, and not have them call her. She said to the person on the phone something about being more comfortable communicating that way, she can put down what she wants without to SAY.

That comment she made, well it made me think about all the things we have at our fingertips to make life easier, to be able to move at a faster pace. Each thing has its benefits- however, they should not replace the more personal, hands-on, practicing talent, task, interactions or skill.

When I have been trained, and when I have trained others. The teaching included showing the pieces to the action being taught, having the other demonstrate the action/ talent/ skill being taught, and letting the trainee do it themselves over and over again, but having the steps checked until it is assured they know it more naturally. I currently am going through one of those teachings, showing and demonstrating times in my life. Learning a new role at work, listening, taking notes, seeing it done, and having the “baton” passed so I can demonstrate I am becoming more comfortable and confident in each step. As the days pass, and I look back a couple months, I realize how far I have come, yet am realistic at the journey ahead as more processes and steps are introduced and one day become something I am proficient at.

Even though life is like that, we need to make darn sure before we take the “easy” way, we have personally become comfortable in a more personal way. We need also to understand practice makes us more proficient. From learning how to walk, and being able to walk… to learning how to add, subtract, speak in an intellectual conversation, cook, doing a game, reading a book, the list is infinite.

Virtual meetings, training, communicating makes so much of life so much better. We can jot a thought in an instant message at 2AM, and the other person can get it whenever they are awake…  Yet, there is a fine line when we could realize that our personal relationships, our whole life has become virtual. If life gets to a point when we could move away, go to a different city, state, country, and our life would be the same, no one would even know we moved, that is a  message that we have not only taken advantage of the virtual life conveniences, we have let them take over us.

When was the last time you …. fill in the blank? And if the power was off / the internet down/ ( that list goes on and on too) … do you know how to improvise?

When was the last time you looked into a personal eyes and spoke – face to face? When was the last time you touched a deck of cards or held a book? Have you ever done a no electronics evening or weekend?

Even though the modern conveniences make life able to be more productive, more chaotic, more impersonal, we need to stop and not let it replace the 3D life we are blessed with. I would rather hold a child’s hand, then hold a cell phone and screen chat. I would rather sit at a table and play a game of ( the list is so long… ie: cards, Yahtzee, Scrabble, Sorry, Trouble….. and on and on) than to only ever play it on my electronic device.

Yes, the books on our electronic devices are great, and being able to do a 1000 piece puzzle and never worry about that one lost piece or someone messing it up… those are all great. I just do not to ever become so dependent on the “no touch” that it becomes me.

As this weekend begins, I am looking forward to what the day will bring, who will I personally see face to face? Who will I talk to and not type my words to? What will I do that is hands on? What will I remember more vividly because of those one to one moments? I am off to experience life and all there is in the minutes ahead.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

 

Life’s too short

In life these days things seem to be more impersonal, at a time when maybe it feels like they are not. I have been giving this a lot of thought as I realize the days in my rearview mirror on my journey down life’s road are a whole lot more than the days yet to be traveled. There are things that must be important to me, as one evening I found myself writing things down that were being fed through me if that makes any sense. There are times in my life when I feel like I am the instrument to relay a thought, a poem, a song. I have a list of what I will refer to as some of life’s lessons, this list of “lessons” are words written down, joined together on paper and created in some of those times.

For today one of the thoughts is this.    20 minutes, 2 hours, 6 hours,8 hours or more is a lot closer then Heaven.

This thought is rather eye-opening to me, as there are so many times I am finding this to be true in life. Life becomes chaotic with STUFF. Busy things to do that really seem to get in the way of relationships. We can say a person lives too far away, we can have a good intention for stopping over to a person’s house or meeting them for coffee, but unless we react to the thought, the minutes turn into hours, into days, months and years.

In the blink of an eye that person / those people can be gone. Personally, I have experienced this, as many others have too. I hear people complaining that their parent(s) are annoying, or their grandparents being forgetful or hard to talk to, that their mom is so difficult to be around, or their dad is overpowering, or they live too far away, or “I just don’t have the time”.  Not making that call, not sending a personal card….

At 4 my grandmother died, and as I look back, out of all my relatives and friends that have died, I had the most involved relationship with her for the short years we had together. She lived with us, in an upper apartment in Bridgeport Conn. She was blind, so as a toddler, I was taught to always pick up things from the floor, do not move furniture from it’s set place, all to avoid her falling or tripping. I remember sitting on her lap as she “read” me a story. At the time there was just my sister Karen, Pam and me. My 2 older brothers did not live with us, they were off on their own. We would tell her what book it was, and we would turn the pages as she told the story from her memory of it.

My dad, he was a traveling salesman and the job required him to be gone most weekdays and nights. When he was home though, each moment was priceless to me. At the very young age of 10, I had one of the most traumatic losses in my life, my father died. Since he died there are so very many times I wished he was alive to guide me through life. My sister Karen was in nursing school at that time, and at home, well we had me, Pam and in addition younger sisters and 2 younger brothers. It was an incredible challenge in so many ways. I wish he had been there as my teenage years turned into young adulthood. And even though I have felt his presence, it is not like having his tough love, his insight. I never wished he had been home more, I accepted life was that way, I just wished I had more years of him being home when he could be.

My mom, she lived for 35 years after my dad died. And no matter how far or close I lived from her, there are times I saw her very infrequently. I regret that more then I can ever explain. She was a wise woman, quiet, offered advice when asked, but gave it sparingly unless she felt is absolutely necessary to say something. She would never ask for company to visit, yet she always had tea and chocolate chip cookies ready for those moments someone came over. I believe she was always prepared for visitors to come by, yet she had things she did when no one came.  She did volunteer work for local causes, she was a pen pal to those who were in life situations where they had little if no communication with the outside world. I guess I used my life situation to justify not taking that time out of my day to visit her more. Years later though, I wonder if she ever longed for that door to open?

My sister Pam, she died at the young age of 47. Alone in her townhouse, she had not felt well and whatever she had, it caused her death. I visited her only twice in her Ohio home.  It was really not too many months prior to her death. Both times were accompanied by another sister, we were on a mission to help Pam from a situation of hoarding. She was such a private person, she never ever indicated to me, in all the years she was there, that she was hoarding. When she reached out and asked for help, her voice had been desperate, and a plea. Something that I had never ever experienced from her. We talked briefly on the phone every week or so, but I never visited her there. She is gone, I can no longer look to make up for lost time.

Family, friends, events. I can not even begin to list those friends who have died, or who I have lost contact with, people who meant a lot to me. Life is filled with “I need to” call so and so, or visit so and so…. and not make them the action of “I am going to “?

Holidays, Sunday dinners, knocking on the door because you know there are open invitations… how many of these things do we totally put on the back burner? Oh, we can come up with a bunch of reasons, we do that, we justify our inactions by sounding like there are great reasons not to do something.

But that moment when you get that message, that phone call, read that obituary and realize that you have missed opportunities that will NEVER come to be. In my list of life’s lessons, the ones that appeared on paper from the pen I held as my hand moved to form the words…. well this is the first of many I have written down … more to follow.

 

Having a spouse with Bipolar Disorder

       I am sitting here listening to nothing but the hum of the modem next to me. The dog is sleeping and Mark has just said he was going to bed. I am tired, yet not feeling like I can get to bed quite yet. These last 4 months have been anything but easy for me or for Mark either. He has been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder for a long time. I am trying to pinpoint the actual diagnosis and I think it was around 2004. Before the diagnosis, there were times of extreme energy, and extreme “insight”, extreme anger, enlightening, followed by significant depression and paranoia sometimes on both sides of the spectrum.

  After the diagnosis, as we looked in the rearview mirror of our life, we realized that the times of behaviors that were not his normal self-were most likely  cycling through mania or depressions, and we could pretty much pinpoint the cycling was once every 4-5 yrs, and through the years it became more frequent, cyclical and seemed to be certain months/seasons each year.  After the diagnosis and medical treatment, 3 hospitalizations, and after trying a few types of medications, the docs for the meds that worked for him. Meds that helped to control the highs from getting too high and the lows from getting too low.

Well, this last manic episode, the current one, has been going on for 4 months, and it has been probably the most fluctuating, and high energy one yet. There have been quick decisions, fast changes, to the point that from one moment to the next it can feel like the direction changed  360 degrees. Now I am not saying the changes (as I step back and look are bad, )they are just rapid, and for a non-manic person, it is really exhausting.  I am doing my best to keep up with the latest changes, and I think when everything settles down, we won’t regret the changes, but he will be looking at it like he ran a 1000 mile marathon, and with his disabilities, that would be an impossible feat.      (  This photo represents the speed and number of thoughts and changes these last 4 months have been like )

Everything he has done, he has learned, he has made happen has been with the best of intention. To secure our future, our kids future, and their kids future. It has been 4 months of very little sleep, learning about how investing works, evaluating and adjusting our vehicle situation, thinking about where we live and where we may want to live in years to come, reaching out to family he had not spoken to in a very long time, realizing life is precious, and analyzing every nook and cranny of our life. He has not meant to, but cannot stop talking at times, assuming how an interaction will go that has not yet happened and having conversations with that person before the event even materializes ( if it ever will)

So that is why I am here typing,  the silence right now is priceless. I love him to pieces, and I am sure he has no idea how many words he can say in a short period of time, or how all the things that make sense to him, are hard to process for me, as his mouth cannot keep up with his mind or his thoughts. I read an article on being in a marriage with a Bipolar spouse, and one of the things mentioned is to deep breathe, well I have been a deep breather for a long time, but I have taken it to new levels, my lungs have got to be the clearest they have ever been.  All of the symptoms mentioned he has displayed, and FINALLY, I feel we are starting to calm the symptoms down. It has got to do a number on his body, the non stop everything, the emotions from ecstatic to such anger and rage, the lack of sleep, the continuing fast pace of his brain, and feeling like he is in a fog at times, that all has to take a toll on one’s body.

  HE tries frequently to take off for a bit to give me a break, and even though it is nice he does that, the mania can contribute to more new ideas, more changes. He will take his kindle and cell phone and head off to the library, or Dunkin Donuts and work on things he is doing there.

His doctor just doubled his one medication, and that is slowly working so he can sleep through the night. Last night was the first night he slept more than 2-3 hrs. Yeah, I think he actually slept for 7 hrs last night. I too was sleeping, as it has been a ride and a half. He said he does not feel as scattered or spinning as he has been. He tries to appreciate my needs during the day, but it is not easy for him.    I have learned many times over that Bipolar is not able to be managed without professional care. That med management or therapy might each work, but for the best care, you need both. The therapist should be one who understands bipolar disorder and also how it affects people in different phases of their life. As a person ages, the disorder takes on different characteristics, at least that is what I am witnessing.

 The internet is such a wealth of information, and there are forums and support groups for anything you can think of, BUT I do feel the internet can also be a trigger for the mania to be refed as it is trying to slow down. There is so much coming at us from all kinds of areas, it can be a blessing and a curse at the same time.

So as I sit here in silence, I am thankful he can sleep, I am spending some time praying, talking to God, I am trying to gather my thoughts and I am thankful for all the positive things that have happened and also thankful for the support of our family members who have been there through all of this. It has not been easy, not for me, or for him. Thank God for our children, for our grandkids, for his mom, for our children’s spouses, for our friends who understand and for our church.

 One of the MANY things that have been accomplished in a very short period of time, is he signed up for a domain name and will have a website up and running hopefully in a few weeks. We need to take time to dedicate solely to that, to design the web pages and have the platform for him, for me, for others to post on and for him to share some of his thoughts, some of his experiences, some of him that is what makes him the incredible person that he is. So be watching for his blogs to start on his very own website in weeks to come.  There will be things written, that come from his mind through his hands and end up as words on the screen, things that I do not know, things that show what makes him who he is.      So thanks for reading this, thanks for your time. Say a prayer that the meds will continue to slow him down a bit so he can see the world,  so he can stop and hear things being said, so he can stop and see all the gifts God gives us every single minute, every single breath, every single day.

Until later….                                     Mrs Justa  is signing off.

 

 

 

Mrs Justa and the Holiday Season… love it

The Holiday time seems different each year.

Some things always fill my heart with smiles. Like going around and looking at peoples decorations.

This house has been amazing for the last few years. I can not wait to go check it out again.

This was in 2010 …………………….

 

 

 

The year I took this ( Dec 2011) , as we were driving by… we stopped and came across this sign.

 

 

 

someone had stolen one of their inflatable yard ornaments..but these people did not lose faith though. Someone else came and replaced it for them. They have a can to put non perishables in for a local food pantry. They are people who give to others they do not know by decorating and collecting.

As a grandparent—it is warming for me to know our kids are with their kids opening gifts in the morning and spending those special times together. I always felt Christmas morning was a private time, a personal time for the parents and their children or for the couple with their life. My mom never demanded Mark and I be at her house in the morning with the kids… we gathered together on Christmas eve…

Christmas is a time to be thankful for those you share your day to day life with. Over the years I have watched as friends have gone through the turmoil of trying to balance between grandparent houses..Worrying about whose house you have to be at, or who you have to plan on entertaining on Christmas morn. I swore I would never be that demanding parent/grandparent.. And I do not think I have been—nor will I ever be.

Now we are older… our kids are grown and have kids of their own..Christmas is a different kind of special. It still has it’s same meaning… but it is Mark and I… we have no alarm clock… we have a quiet breakfast… sip on our hot beverage of tea or coffee..and just enjoy the time of being. I am so thankful we had all the years of having our kids excitement flow over a quick breakfast but I do not feel cheated now..life is chapters in our books of life. Nothing stays the same. Oh there are constants in life… like watching ITs A Wonderful Life…and Decorating for Christmas… and sending cards…baking special cookies, making special gifts….and I totally love the happiness I feel around –it is a time a solitude, a time of appreciating what we have—no matter how much or little.

I no longer feel pressured by buying things..we do it gradually..Mark and I actually go out together and chose a gift or 2 for ourselves..and wrap it and than we open it on Christmas morning. One year we did it way before Christmas..and when we went to open them.. we forgot what we bought ourselves!.

I love Christmas carols when it is closer to Christmas… I love church and the amazing scripture of Mary and Joseph and Jesus. I just can not begin to explain how much I love the season. I feel so blessed to be able to live in a country where people can decorate, where people can freely go from neighborhood to neighborhood enjoying the lights and decorations. I love that we have had Christmas magic when we were children, when we had children and now with grandchildren.

It is truly a special time of the year for me.

I hope you can go look at decoration where you live..and hope you feel the magic of the season….. My love to all.. Mrs Justa alias Cindy.

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Mrs Justa and humbling moment

We are just back from a 5 day camping span at East Coast Resorts. It was a nice weather spell of camping, I did work this week so it was just commuting from work to there instead of to here. It was nice once Friday night arrived, to be able to not worry about the alarm going off and missing work.

The weather was cooler than it has been for the majority of this summer, and we got to do a fire Saturday night, did the S’Mores things, got some pretty relaxing moments..and now we are home..laundry almost done, and we are about to have a 4th birthday celebration for Brandon.

On the way home I was humbled . Often I find myself thinking about how nice it would be to be this or that..to win the lottery, …and than I was leaving Nice and Easy after placing the order for pizza and wings for the party for Brandon.

AS I opened the door there was an older man. He was walking with a stride of maybe 3 inches a step. His left foot was totally curled in and he was walking literally on his ankle bone. He had a cane. The gas pump says “Pay before fueling”, it is at least 30 feet from the pump to the door…. and he wanted $20.00 worth of fuel. SO he was hobbling to the store to pay 20.00 dollars and than going to hobble back to his car to pump the gas. ( actually hobbling would have been faster than he was able to move)

As I watched this , I felt horrible for this man. People coming and going..it was like he was invisible. Mark was parked away from this person, but could see the man from the pick up. He had Riley with him… I came up to our pick up, gave Mark the coffees I bought and said I would be right back.

I was able to get back to the man-and he still had not made it to the store entrance. I asked if I could help..and you would have thought I offered him a million dollars. He explained he was going in to pay for his gas, I asked if he wanted me to do that for him. With shaking hands he gave me $20.00 from a weathered black billfold—held together with a rubber band….…his skin translucent ..his body hunched and frail. I told him he could wait for me..or head back towards his car. He headed to his car..and got maybe a foot when I got back outside. When I came back out and asked if I could help him. He said if I held his arm—he could walk faster. ( his gait was 3 1/2 inches max with assistance).

AS we were slowly walking to his car..he told me he has a crooked foot..and he is going to have surgery in December..He said something about “maybe I should ask if they could do it sooner”… I agreed that might be good. I asked him how bad his pain is? He said “pretty bad..but I get by… “ We talked about after surgery, I asked if he had thought he might need rehab? He said that he figured he would go to rehab and hopefully be able to walk again before he goes home.

I asked is he had ever seen the walkers with seats on them? He said he had but did not know where to get one. So I shared with him various places I had seen them… my goodness I was tempted to tell him to hang out there and run to Walgreens and get him one.

I asked him if there was anything else I could do to help..he said pumping his gas would be nice. So I got him to his car..pumped his gas… and watched as he got into his car.

All of the sudden anything I have wrong is not so bad.  Most things I can take care of myself… this man … he was “getting by” …he is going to have a long road to walk correctly again…and he can not fix what is wrong by himself. I wonder why a doctor would put off that surgery for at least  5 months? Golly gee— this guy can not walk !! What is he supposed to do? Who is his advocate for care?

I can not get him out of my mind. I wish I had asked him where he lived..I wished I had been able to do more. This man –he was the poster child for determination..for fighting adversity….God Bless him..I hope he gets his surgery sooner than December.

Love to all… our summer is winding down..that means my posting will be getting more regular. Mrs Justa alias Cindy…

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Mrs Justa and the family reunion

Family reunions… they are neat to have. Our family is pretty large, and unfortunately not many could attend, but those who did, I am thankful for the time with them. It was the first year my oldest brother Don and his wife Sally could not attend. That was weird. They are the rock for the reunion. Sally loves to plan it and organize it, and that component was missing this time around. Don LOVES the kids… and the kids who are now adults with kids of their own. They are very wise and giving of themselves people, they are real people..not pretend. They were missed.

It is strange but even family who live within a 20 mile radius of each other here in the Syracuse area—we do not spend nearly enough time together, so it was good to have quality time with them too. I felt bad for my nephew—who has 4 siblings, and none were there. His mom and step dad were there though and his kids got to spend time with their grandparents.

My brother, his wife, Mark and me, our new dog Riley Regan, my sister and her 2 kids , my nephew , his wife and 2 kids, and another sister and her husband were there. It was a hot humid few days. A few of us had campers with AC- and that was great for Riley, and the grandkids and their parents…—Riley  was not feeling 100%, so the cooler temps were good for her too. . Our nights were more comfortable than they had been in years passed when we had a pop up without AC, and when we were tenting.

I was over at Jeff and Amanda’s one night as the fire flies were darting back and forth. Brandon was trying to figure out what they were. So Jeff caught one in his hands and let Brandon peak inside and see the fly light up… it was magical, it was heart warming , it was wonderful to see the wonder and excitement in Brandon’s face..and the love in Jeff’s face as he was explaining to Jeff what these lights were.

This is living..this is what life is about. Not the DVDs, or the Nike at nite channels.. no nature, parents, kids, spending time with one another ant not I phones, computers, I pads.

Taking the nap under the tree,

playing with bubbles.

 

 

playing cards at a picnic table

 

 

 

 

 

having the grandkids help walk the dog…

 

 

Having a grand child help with the dishes….

 

 

Just enjoying each moment. Now it will be another year before we all come together.

That is a long time. We are hoping all can come next year… each person not there was missed terribly.

I am thankful we were able to share the 5 days though with all who could come for all or part of it.

I love my family… I love my husband who came into my family through marriage and shares in this annual event ! I feel truly blessed.

Love to all.. Mrs Justa alias, Cindy

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Mrs Justa and the dog will be here soon

The anticipation of getting a pet is overwhelming at times. Did we get everything we will need? Will she like the food? Will she tell us when she has to go out? Will she listen? Is she a chewer? How long will Imus and the new dog take to accept one another?

Tomorrow we hope we can get her. She was spayed today and they said by around noon she should be all set to come home. 

We met our friends tonight and had dinner. It was kind of weird-our excitement and their not even beginning to comprehend why we would do  this life changing event. They are not pet people.. we are. It is similar to my not liking boating, or having horses.

We all have our interests, our compassions. I try to understand those who really like something that I just look at and say “ What am I missing?”

But it is natural for us to prepare for a dog.. my goodness, dogs can be such an intricate part of our lives..and we swore we would never get another..but her story—her smile… she won us over… This is like preparing for a new kid in 24 hrs!. Oh you will have to watch for some photos… her leaving the shelter, her riding in the car..her coming to her new home…

yep—a new little girl in the house. Can not wait!.

Have a great night…. love to all.. it is late—I am going in a zillion directions..and I gotta stop and SLEEP… love to all.. Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and your life is yours..theirs is theirs

We are all experts in life… well at least it seems at times like we pretend to be. I find myself..and others seeming to know the pathways others are taking are not wise, or they seem to be very critical, or they are too cheap, or too lush..

Oh we see the errors of others ways.. But in reality—none of us know what is right for someone else.. not until we have walked at least a mile in their shoes.

Come on, I know you each have run across a friend or a relative.. and you wonder why they can not see what they are doing wrong? Or we wonder why they can not see a path they are headed down.

We shake our heads and go on in our life.

But news flash…. I bet dollars to donuts—those same people are trying to figure out why you are not doing things a certain way.

None of us are perfect enough to judge others.. We never will be… I do not think any of us were given the power to control or judge anyone.

We can teach our children, we can work closely with co-workers as peer support type people,we can work to train people as they are new to a job or an experience… but we can not judge people. No matter their age, no matter their race, no matter their behaviors…. We are maybe more apt to look at others—than spending the time looking at ourselves. I is easier to focus on others than on our own faults and weaknesses.

It hit me as I was in the ladies room… at Denny’s.  These 2 VERY old women were talking as I was sitting there trying to do the business I went in there for. And they were talking about getting older, about how people misjudge them..thinking that their age is stopping them from being totally there… and they regretted that the body ages slowly—and not just all at once. But they kept coming back to how they are looked at, how they are treated, some people treat them like they are not smart, like they are deaf, like they are vulnerable…. … I felt guilty flushing the toilet and coming out of the stall..because it was a pretty intense conversation they were having… I felt like I was plopped into their world uninvited.. But alas—I came out ..at the sink one of the woman came out and looked at me… she was kind of frail appearing—but her spirit was STRONG>>> and she said.. “Honey, getting old is tough, the 90’s are no picnic. ! Look at me..I am just skin and bones… my brain is sharp—my body thin…but as I figure it.. God knows what He is doing..and I guess he wants me really thin when it is my turn to go to heaven….. “ I told her she was looking pretty good to me!… She said” I am going to be 90 on 5-12….yep I was born 5-12-22.” I told her Happy Birthday…. She said” I am tired of all the doctors…. I am tired of all the waiting rooms… But I am not quitting.” … she was a spunky lady… and as I walked out to the car… smiling.. I was wondering where her shoes have gone over these 90 years…. what roads in life led her to here…..

Love to all. Mrs Justa… alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and the lonely man

As the day turns to dark… what goes through your mind?

As the day ends, do you feel blessed to have just come through the day, or regrets for a day that has passed?

On my way in today there was a contest on the radio. This man called, he sounded rather monotone—he had a deep voice, spoke slow and clear. He won the contest and the station has what they refer to as “a shout” , where the contestant can say something to someone or a group of people… people say hi to spouses, or co workers, or kids, or maybe a group they are a part of…. and they offered him a “Shout” …. silence…. the radio personalities asked him if he was still there… and he said yep… than they were kinda pep talking to him for his chance to “shout out”..and he said ..”I have no family… I have no friends…I have no one…. “ The radio guy and gal did not know what to say….it was one of those moments when words do not come….out of the darkness of the awkward silence the man said “I will shout out to everyone trying to make the world a better place.”

I wonder if this person had just recently become all alone in the world..or has it been for a very long time. Did he have a big family..or was he an only child? He did not sound like he had activities outside of the home…. he sounded truly alone. I felt so bad for this person….

And than I thought about many of us…. how many of us would be in the same situation on the bumpy road of life. Those people who live their life with one person, their every move and breath feels at times it is for the other person, and in a blink of an eye—you can be alone. I know a lady who is recently widowed…they had no children…it was them..He had kids from a previous marriage who are all grown up and have places other than here to be.. and I wonder about how she feels as the daylight turns to darkness… She has a strong faith, she believes in God and in the wonders of life beyond here… but she has asked we not ask her too much about how she is..she is trying to heel the pain from the loss….

When my mom became a widow—she had just given birth to her 6th child..so I do not think she had time to feel the darkness the way I think this woman might be.

Life is what we make it… but sometimes I think it becomes overwhelming—exhausting—to make it anything but lonely.

Love to all…

I hope you have at least one somebody in your life… Mrs Justa alias Cindy 

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Mrs Justa and elderly mind set

Okay, as you know –or maybe you do not… this aging stuff can be kind of tough to focus on. I do not feel elderly” nope..

I feel middle age, thankful I am not 20, and glad I am not 90. Somewhere in between is okay.

This cartoon character is where I feel I will be someday not today.

So I gotta tell ya, on the radio tonight on my way to the gym,I am humming and feeling great and THAN the radio talk guy was talking about a terrible event last night when a 56 year old woman was a victim of a home invasion.

He was talking about the 56 year old age of this woman to great length… he said” An elderly woman…”than he stopped and said “ Is 56 elderly? I think it might be..” he went on to say she was a woman on the cusp of being elderly. Well the more he said, the less I felt like driving to the gym… I was wondering if maybe I should be driving to “Ted” the mortician and making arrangements.

But I fought the elderly talk.. yep let it fly by me—THAN he said  “This poor granny was a victim..” Gee whiz… I am thinking   “I AM A GRANNY COME TO THINK OF IT !”

But this granny still got to the gym ( I have not gone directly to the gym after work for a few months…. ) so this was a pleasant change . See usually I come home.. well after I am home—and we have had dinner—and I start to unwind from the events of the day.. Mark and start to chat- go onto the computer—it is easier to get into my sweats or jammies… and not my gym stuff.

Tonight it was cool.. ( I mean temperature cool) in the gym. Like NO HEAT cool… I thought at first I was gonna freeze- but a couple Moody Blues tunes on my MP3 and it got pretty darn warm in that very cool gym.

I am about to exit- stage left— and watch my favorite shows tonight. They have not been new for 2 weeks.. so this is nice. I will take my rather sore body, my rather sore ELDERLY body… or should I say…. MY DECREPED ELDERLY body into the living room , have a nice cup of tea… ( GOSH Isn’t that what elderly people do- have tea at night !!?? YIKES maybe I am this cartoon figure in this post !!) – yes this ELDERLY WORN OUT GRANNY is signing off… (Clip art from People Clip Art» elderly_lady6.gif)

Love to all, Mrs Justa.. alias Old Lady. HA! 

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Mrs Justa and life and death

Kind of depressing task we are about to undertake.. ( ooo that is not an appropriate word for this task…) going over our “Last Will and Testament “ to make sure it is still what we want them to say. It is very weird to write down what my wishes are after I die. It brings death closer to the surface. Not that I plan on going anywhere yet… but my life on earth is a temporary stop to my real home..where I hope someday I am headed to. (Just not too soon!)

As we scan over what we wrote 10+ years ago, we have found a few areas that definitely need tweaking. I have been through experiences where people have died without a will, and what a pain in the neck… the estate becomes “intestate” which means the NYS takes over the estate and the state divides the assets of the deceased according to the law. This takes a really long time, and it drags out, it really causes unnecessary pain and stress to those left behind.

So we are trying to make sure our wills are up to date. Fortunately the lawyer who we worked with in 2001 is still around , so at least we do not have to start at square one.

I want my passing to go smoothly..well as smoothly as possible..I also want it to be at least 50 years from now !By than our grandkids will be in their 50s, and our kids pushing 80. Than I will believe I have lived a full life.

I find myself wondering how IT will happen.. it is kind of scary to me to think one moment you are here and the next you are gone. I want everything clearly done, the bills, the insurance info, the clutter out of my life and not to burden anyone with it.
Have you ever known a situation when a person dies and the loved ones are left almost overwhelmed with everything the person had..and having to clear it out.  Worried about missing something important, yet kind of in shock going through the persons life.

When my mom died I remember she had bought Christmas presents throughout the year. She died in November ( on the 3rd) and as we worked through each nook and cranny we found these gifts , unwrapped, hidden in a closet. It was so difficult to try to get into her head and figure out which item was for which person.

She did have a will, but it left out a lot of stuff…she had 76 years of stuff… bless her heart, she tried, but as we worked to go through every area of the house… we came across a lot we knew nothing about what it was ..what it stood for..what it meant to her. At that moment, I realized all I thought I knew about her…there was much I did not know..and it was too late.

It is impossible to cover every inch of our lives, to open our memories to those left behind. To make sure that people know what they meant to us… FOr me, I want to  have things in such a way , that people remember me for being me..and not for my disorganization…

I will try to have as much in order as possible. Depressing as it is… if we accept life.. we accept death too. Can not have one without the other. I just want to delay for MANY years the second half…

If you do not have a will… I would recommend having one.. it gives YOU the power to make life a little easier for those in your life… spouses, siblings, pets, charities..whatever is important to you alive.

Love to all. Mrs Justa..alias Cindy..

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Mrs Justa and beyond the working years.

Retirement…. wow… a friend at work.. one of my day time family members ..is retiring this week. She is 8 years older than I am . I remember –what seemed as not so long ago—when retirement was what old people do, it is what is earned from years of working, somehow I believed when I was younger that retirement is something we each are entitled to, a time when there is no more alarm clock, no more worrying about having to drive in through blinding snow storms, and just stay home and relax. I remember  being around retired people and they would pull a wad of money out of their wallet or pocket like it was nothing. As a child it was like the money was just always there for them, because they were older.

Well for me, as the years of working continue and the number worked far exceeds the number left to work…. retirement is not what I had pictured as a youth,   the thought that when one retires there is unending money has come to reality that it does not happen that way. There is a 401 K and there is a retirement plan at work, but it is not like working for the state or federal government,,, where retired  employees  get a percentage of their pay for life… that is nice.
The paths chosen in life have led us to where we are now, and I do not regret where we are ..just wish I knew than what I know now. Growing old seemed like something that would never happen … it was like it was an infinite time away.

This lady, she has a retirement plan that is pretty good, her husband too has one from where he was employed, where he receives quite a bit each month, just because he worked at a place that had a contract for the employees when they get to their golden years.

They have sold their home, they found a condo in Florida ( furnished) for less than 20,000.00..they bought a summer trailer for a camp area up here, and they have downsized to the max. She had garage sales where she sold every single thing she could, and made a nice amount of money from it. I am happy for her.

And we… we will be okay when the day hits. And that day could be 10 years away !…maybe more. It will be different than the illusion, than the vision, than the innocence of youth image of what the future will be like. We will be frugal  we will downsize, we probably will  be comfortable being in our home, and I guess with that outlook, we will appreciate every penny. If we are lucky in our choices , maybe we could be in warmer climates for the coldest months, but if not..we will probably have to sell this place and move into a place where the maintenance is done for us.

I look at the incredible numbers of people turning to retirement each day… it is pretty overwhelming. The future is so uncertain… but we will walk through it one step at a time. I would love to have the extra time to devote to the grandkids, or to volunteer for those in need. Maybe be like a foster grandparent at the hospital. To lead a simple life, cut down our needs and enjoy every second we have left.

Our kids and spouses seem to have understood the importance of planning for the future, and I am glad they have… for one day, they can live the dream of retirement in  comfort, the way it should be .

I hope you have a plan, that you have had the blocks lined up for the future…. peace to all, Love Mrs Justa..alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and the Memorial service

I went to a Memorial Service tonight for the woman at church who had cancer. It was a pretty well attended service, it was amazing how strong her husband is , how well her kids are doing.

I watched how at peace they all are, and when her husband spoke, he told of a couple funny times in their past, and when friends spoke..they talked of her love for life and acceptance that the life she lived was worth it, and how she had accepted her next chapter in her existence. I am glad I went… and as I left I wondered about all the people who have died before, and how they left marks in life…how in some small fashion their souls created etchings in others memories.

Pastor Carl spoke that we are not the skin, the flesh, the bones—it is our souls that make up who we are. Our bodies are temporary- our souls are forever.

I took this photo today , and I did it because it represented to me phases of life. We change continually as we age and go through steps of life.

I saw this stack of leaves as an example  of life’s lessons. All in one place. Green leaves showing the knowledge we do not have yet, colors to show our wisdom and pride, brown to show the experience of living through stages of life, and there are even some that are close to being dust. There is a song I sing called Sand and Dust… and it basically says we come from a speck—we live life—and we become dust in the end.

I truly believe we have reasons for being here, and I wonder what the list has in store for me. I look at myself in the mirror- my eyes show the same person I was 40 years ago..but take a photo and the eyes are a small portion of the real me—the aging me. My hands – I look at them and they are not mine ( in my mind) The skin is becoming wrinkled, there is a lack of elasticity in them—they can not be my hands. These hands are an image of years of experiences, years of wear and tear….And than reality hits, and I am reminded what my hands have experienced. Making crafts, coloring, writing letters, typing thoughts, holding hands, holding my new born baby, making a hug feel snug, brushing hair , massaging, helping out patients who need assistance, tickling a my son’s back when he was a toddler, petting a dog, preparing meals, climbing trees, the list goes on and on. As I looked at these leaves- I feel like the green one… but am more the curling red ones.

These leaves reminded me—as did the service tonight—that we need to take advantage of every single breath we breathe, every minute in the day, and let others know what they mean to you…..before we are more like the leaves without color- with holes—turning to dust. Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and life’s lessons

Some of the best moments in life are those in the casual times. When we let life be, when we are sitting somewhere, being relaxed, talking and sharing thoughts as they come out.

This was taken Fathers Day, it was Mark and Brandon having a conversation about who knows what, Mackenzie watching on ..but Brandon is very involved in whatever it is grandpa ( affectionately referred to as “papa”) is saying to him. Things he will remember …. I love to see the kids and how they each interact with him.

Life is short really in the scheme of things, and moments I had with my grandmother were special, but only for 4 years. Moments with my dad..those were  special too, because he was traveling all the time as a salesman, so when I had a moment I could call our own—oh it felt so good to me.

My mom was always busy with babies it seemed… but through the hustles of life—there were time when each person shared words of wisdom with me.

I remember things my parents and grandmother said to me, just off the cuff things. Prophetic type things, things they would say with starting out “Cynthia, always remember that… “ And you know what, whenever I heard something starting out with that phrase, I  listened as if they were giving me a secret of life worth more than money could buy…funny…I think I looked at them like Brandon was looking up at grandpa in that picture.

I cherished the moments with these adults in my life… as special moments. The way I think the grandkids cherish moments with the adults in their lives..

I have held onto these words of wisdom for many many years…..

Like

always say a prayer each day, not asking for things, but thanking God for all you have, even when it feels like you have nothing-you have life, you have spirit, you have faith.

never wear underwear with holes in them… if you got in an accident the people at the hospital would see your underwear.. ( and to this day… no underwear with holes in them get on my body)…

think before you speak, words are like knives in the soul…

look both ways before you cross the street….

don’t bite the hand that feed you…..

never go to sleep on an angry sun(…that is hard to do when you are really angry with someone)

beauty is only skin deep… the real you is what is in your heart…………….

beauty is as beauty does……

haste makes waste………….

honesty is the best policy…( I learned the HARD way that this was true…. in my youth(oh about 6 or 7) I lied a lot. My mom told me I would never be believed and we would have to move for me to start fresh with people. When we moved when I was 10 I finally felt like I had a new lease on life, for mom said we had to move before anyone would believe anything I said.

 

there are no guarantees in life except birth and death

money can not buy happiness

the best things in life are free

cherish every moment like it is your last, for one moment will be your last…

the only time you should look down at another person, is when you are lending them a hand to help them up…

respect your elders ( this is getting harder as I am becoming more elder !!!)

smile often, smile from your heart….a smile costs you nothing but can be shared by many….

crap does not run up hill….

it is better to give than to receive

and if you do not love yourself, you can not love another truly….

as I write these down I am feeling a terrible loss… the loss of the words of wisdom from my grandmother, my mom and dad…. I miss them !!!

Peace to all… my mind is reeling with lessons of life…. Love, Mrs Jsuta alais cindy

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