weight loss

jToday… one of those first days100_2775 for the rest of my life days..These last 3 weeks have not been conducive for the gym and me meeting. Oh there are a number of reasons… one was that I had not been feeling really great 3 weeks ago.. terrible flank pain and urinary infection…So 7 days of antibiotics and lots of fluids…and that led me into weeding the garden and trying to seal the house from the squirrel….for a zillion hours that next weekend. It was a full time job for 2 days….

During the next week , I was just not feeling 100%, than we went to Roch the next weekend to meet up with Emily( would not trade that for anything in the world Smile ) last week I was spending weeknights getting stuff in order to go camping—push mowed the edges of the yard one evening, did the lists for camping, laundry, packing….than last weekend camping. During the week days at work- I do try to get out and stroll for 20-30 minutes— but that is not the gym.

Monday and Tuesday were not working for me this week—last night I was weeding the mulch on the sidewalk and the front of the house-plus weeded the flower garden by the sign..and Monday night—well I planted the vegetable garden…and between the 2 evenings—I was a buffet dinner for a bunch of bugs…. dang!!!! sooo tonight was the back to the gym night.

100_2225It is that time of the year that I think even more about a friend from the cyber world Stephany..she is an awesome person who has inspired me more than once to be more than I think I can be. She has dealt with life challenges and does not let them get her down…the time is coming for the Chase Corporate Challenge. Now to many this may seem like nothing… but to me—it is rewarding to finish it. I am not a jock, not slim and trim, I am not a runner…I am not out to prove to anyone anything. All the money donated for participating in this event goes to a charity—. The company shares in the cost for it, and it is good to show support for the company we work at. So tonight I started the getting ready for the challenge…
I am no athlete— never claimed to be. So I walk the 3.5 mile –last year with my Mp3 player pushing me down the hot humid pavement path…. I made it to the end….

They close the lake parkway and thousands make the journey down and back….I hope it is in the 60s to 70s… ( not in the 90s like it has been..) and I hope it does not rain—as this is mosquito heaven….last year it was delayed because of rain—and when we started going… well the mosquito corporation decided to join in…

But with each step I take, I think of Stephany… and as songs play and steps add up….I count the songs….think about anything but the firm hot pavement…and smile when I finish…

Off to rest… tomorrow will be here before ya know it….I hope you can find something in your life that inspires you …..Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy


Isn’t it funny how different things make things seem different?                                            Changes the perspective.

                                                                                                Like I was driving to work today, thinking that I felt comfortable in the midsized car I drive—till this big Hummer drove next to me.. made me feel kinda small for the road.


      .So than I am driving a little further feeling small and my whole perspective changed when  a “Smart Car” came barreling down the highway.

Now I felt like I was driving a BIG car.

These little cars are super cute..but I am not thinking I would want to be in them on ice, in a bad wind snow, in deep snow, or in a chain accident.

There is nothing to them !!

AS the day progressed it seemed like big things became little and little things became big.

A case I thought would be very difficult- became quick to get through, while another time a question asked of me took a long time to figure out.

Than tonight… at the gym…. I walk into the locker room to get ready for my work out, and as I am walking in there, I am thinking about how going in and trying to take off a few more pounds… thinking about once I get to wherever I am comfortable at… how neat that will be… and I walk in there—boom…. there are gals in there just coming out of the pool area who were tall. I mean giants… and built like football players… I went from feeling 5’9” tall to feeling like a midget.

It reminds me of times when my dad would go out to cut down the perfect Christmas tree… and outside it looked great.. but when we got home- it was kind of tough getting a 12 foot tree in a 7 foot room!.  Or when you want to help with portion control so you serve food on a small plate. Gives the image of a full plate when it is only half of a bigger plates worth of food.

$5.00 to one person may be like $100.00 to another…

The wind is whipping on the house again… and it has way more power over the world than any of us do…

Everything looked at based on other info… perspective…. . We just have to stay focused… and stay smart… and do not let others bring you down… It is ALL a matter of attitude…..keep a positive attitude…

Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy


No one guarantees that life will be perfect. And because of our freedom to make choices, we tend to make choices that do not always end up with  good endings for us. By poor choices, sometimes choices of entitlement..life ends up far from perfect.

The non perfect lives that many of us live, they can be like  rain storms. Dark and dreary, and it is  easy to hide behind the darkness.We kid ourselves, we say it is not so bad, we say there is no problem and we continue to make bad choices.

I got on this thought process as I worked my less than thin body at the gym this afternoon. I try to really get lost in the music, but at times I can not help but focus on how unbelievably  easy it is to lose control of our selves. People overeat, people over drink, people use all kinds of drugs… and all with a deaf ear for the voice telling them to stop.

Oh that one doughnut, that one pizza, that one pitcher of beer, that bottle of wine, that joint, ..whatever that one thing is… it is followed by other one things and before we know it..we have stopped making decisions based on knowledge..but on emotions.

Speaking from experience… it is a lot easier to eat the doughnut..than to work it off.

As a child, we were rewarded for good behavior, for special events ( concerts we were in, little league games we played, A+ on our report cards..) yep we were rewarded with food. Heck a winning or losing game of little league and the whole family went out for an ice cream sundae at Friendlies. An A+ and we got to go out for a dinner…(usually at Carols Restaurant..( a hamburger joint). For our birthdays we got to chose our favorite food and got cake and ice cream. We had chocolate chip cookies for cleaning our room.

The commercials when we were growing up advertised a cool cigarette for cool woman, I think they were called Virginia Slims. The tough guys were in cowboy outfits with chaps on..and they were smoking on Marlboros or Camels.

Than every ball game on TV had to be watched slugging down beers.

It is no wonder we now have generations of alcoholics, morbidly obese, nicotine addicted or drug addicted individuals. I feel fortunate I did not go the whole gamut and get involved in drugs and alcohol too. Being obese an entire life is not easy either.

The rains storms in our lives are the addictions, the bad behaviors… and the shining through..the rainbows in our lives has to be the inner self coming through and shining over the weaker side. On the Biggest Loser this weak one of the trainers kept screaming at the contestants. NO MORE EXCUSES! Over and over… and it hit home…in more ways than one.  I want to set goals in my life and not let anything get in their way. Keep my knowings and feelings in check. 100_4420_editedIf we all do that… well in the end..we will be like this rainbow..we will be shining past the darkness we have set in our lives.

And maybe just maybe.. with conscious effort..the bad habits can be gone, and for each one a rainbow shines through instead.

How many rainbows do you hope to have glow in your life, demonstrating that you have overcome the darkness, the bad choices………?

Me I am looking to be  starting with 2….Love to all… Mrs Justa alias Cindy..

Whether you think you can or think

you can’t, you’re right.

– Henry Ford


On a daily basis I feel there are times when I am challenged with can I or can’t I choices…. Life is filled with opportunities to say I think I can.. or I know I can’t. I think it is often   easier for people to say “I can’t” because that closes the chapter to that challenge or opportunity. Poof..chapter closed… do not have to look at it… do not have to open the next chapter.

But to think “I can” well that opens doors to turn the rocks of life over and see what is under them. To look deep inside ourselves and see how creative we can be to take on the challenge and see how well we come out in the end of that next chapter.


Where would we be if no one took the challenge to figure out how to get over the rivers, steams and bays? Where would we be if no one took the initiative to find a way to propel ourselves down the road? Where would we be if people did not take the time to figure out what causes diseases,  injuries, health issues….

we would be a nation of people , stranded from travel, dying at young ages, walking everywhere.

It is amazing as I type on this keyboard that at one point I was a tiny baby..I knew nothing, I could not walk, talk, feed my self, cloth myself…and even before I could rationalize  the thought that I could do it… I did do it. We all as infants chose to learn to walk, talk, eat, and become dependent… but than…after climbing so many mountains in life… we stop..and it becomes easier to think..”I can’t do ____” whatever we are challenged with.

My mom used to say..”The easy way is normally not the right way..” and “you have to work for what you are going after in life.” How true that is….nothing that is“ too good to be true..” is worth going after. 100_4061

Look back at your own life… the things you remember, the things that brought you the most satisfaction… did you work for them..or were they just laid in your lap?

For me… I worked HARD to make the things most worthwhile in my life exist…

So tonight I say… take the high road… climb the mountains of life… turn those stones…and find satisfaction at the end of each journey..

Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy


That is me….

Yep.. I did it… (Stephany I was thinking about you as I walked , how you go for goals and achieve them)

This is the annual  Chase Corporate Challenge. They have these signs on the start line for people to go to. The signs indicate the speed each person figures they do a mile in. I figured 15-20 minutes, so I am walking through a crowd of thousands, going to the back of the line… I get towards the back with 6500 of the 7000 people in front of me.. and find the longest time for a mile is 12 minutes. Bummer… my 20 minutes a mile I was proud of just fizzled into a “BIG DEAL” thought in my mind.
So here I stood , amidst a total mob of people , wondering if the heat and humidity escalated by being crunched in around a sea of not so fit bodies, was going to make me sick before I started. Than I am wondering if because I am at the 12 minute a mile mark, if I was going to be in a stampede when the gun gets shot off… needless to say… there was no trampling..and the top picture shows me off and getting ready for the jaunt…

This is my third year. It is a 3.5 mile run or walk ( I am the walk part) and let’s see… the first year..( I was about 55 pounds heavier)  I got 1/2 mile at the most, huffing and puffing all the way…..….

last year about 2 3/4 miles….huffing a little but I did okay….  this year BABY I did it all !! Me and my MP3 player. So I counted songs- and tried to focus on the music and not the walk.

At the gym I have been doing a 20 minute mile, at the corporate challenge I did 3.5 miles in 56 minutes.

I had signed up to walk with a friend..but she ended up canceling her enrollment because of a personal issue. So I was buddiless… but really enjoyed having the music playing.. it kept my mind in happy places instead of thinking about the 85 degree, humid walk down asphalt. I had a cross necklace on, and I kid you not !!!____ there were times I held the cross and prayed for a breeze… and instantly this calming breeze came over us.

They close the Onondaga Lake Parkway and this year 210 companies had employees partake in this corporate challenge. The money earned goes to a local charity. It is really a challenge as each step pounds the hot pavement, but I had new jogging shoes… ( HA don’t cha worry they did not jog !!!) but I guess their support and weight is supposed to be favorable..and My feet did not hurt !!.

SO here I sit… proud of myself really… ( it was funny the winner ran this in 16 minutes…) He was floating through the air as he passed me, and I had not hit the first mile mark yet. I think he was probably home, showered, shaved and snoozing before I got back to the finish line ! But for me.. the ol lady that I am… I feel good.

Next year watch out 16 minute runner… you won’t know what flew by ya !!! ( yeah right !!)

Love to all.. I am off to take a well deserved HOT shower… ( Thank God for hot water heaters, for freedom to run a shower when you want to and for opportunities like tonight. ) Mrs Justa alias Cindy

Someone I know came up to me today and said “ I do not know if I told you, but I am on a diet.” I just shook my head and did not really go into much more, but than she said “On Weds I came to the conclusion that the mirror was not lying.”

As she continued to share her thoughts, she was saying that for a very long time when she looked in the mirror, it was not the image she believed she was. So she has been seeing herself as her mind wants her to be. But now she knows she is heavier than she wants to be, the mirror was not lying and she has come to terms with the fact she needs to reverse the trend.

Well, for anyone who has read any of my posts , or knows me.. someone saying something like this  gets the old rusty gears in my mind spinning, and than I start thinking of similarities, and of things that I can relate to.

It was a very deep subject really.

Have you ever seen a picture of yourself and thought the person who took it was a poor photographer- or they got you on your bad side, or poor lighting, or they needed to get further back. It can’t be the way you look to others really. The camera is lying.

We used to go out to the Large Viewbars for karaoke night. Now the earlier you go, the better the performances…it is great when someone goes up there and is fabulous. There are some people that I remember, I was thrilled when they were up on the stage, it was like going to a concert….But as the night lingers on and more people have had a beer or two, they become braver. Some people open their mouth, and as their voice comes out they hear the artist in their heads, and believe they sound like the artist.. and even though I believe everyone can sing a song- not everyone should sing it in a bar, using a microphone.

Another area I reeled my mind into was clothing. There is a traffic person on a local station here who has told one of the female DJs more than once,, “ Just because they make it in your size, does not mean you should wear it.” This is another angle to what this person was saying to me today. Let’s say you go shopping, and the mannequin looks dynamite in an outfit. So in you go, and low and behold, they have the same outfit in your size … a 2X ! Wow this is your lucky day. . It feels great.. all the time your mind is envisioning the mannequin ( who if she was real probably would be in an inpt program for eating disorders) and when you look in the mirror- you see your eyes…. problem is the clothes are below eye level. But you do not need to look at them- as you know how good it looked on the mannequin.

Life is a deception sometimes… I think at times we focus on what we want to believe instead of how it really is. Maybe that is how a hoarder can hoard. They see the part of the environment that is open, and not all the areas that are packed full. And I believe media and government leaders also play the delusion game.. we are told what someone perceives we should be told..and that is it.

How about when a person is trying to lose weight, and they convince themselves that if no one is looking it is not that bad to eat whatever it is. A delusion that if no one sees you eat it, than it goes no where. My older sister literally carved pages out of books on our bedroom shelves, and hid those big 1 lb candy bars in them- heck she even had a book with the pages cut out for a boxes  of girl scout cookies. HMMM and than she would tell me she could not figure out why she was overweight.

What is real? What are we fooling ourselves with?

What is how we want it to be?

How can we see and be aware of what really is real?

Life in the pretend world seems better at times, I think..until we make ourselves look at life without the rose colored glasses….

HMMM>>> all this  because this person came to me and told me she was on a diet… my mind is reeling… hmmmm.

Love to all, stay focused on the real things.. Mrs Justa alias Cindy


As Christmas has come to a close almost.. I am feeling the sense of  of accomplishment in getting to today. I really feel for the past month there are to-do lists longer than the days.

I just downloaded the photos from today and yesterday and decided to look  back through the photos from 12-25-2009 and I came across this photo of Mark last year…. exactly a year ago. We were at Amanda and Jeffs house on Christmas night.

This is still 2 months before we started the weight loss journey, one that we are still on, but we have made progress.

here is Mark today>>>>>>> 100_6922_edited



As I look at these photos I am thinking the accomplishments made to get from November through Christmas are nothing compared to where he has come in 10 months.

It is a long hard journey and one we hope not to ever go through again. It takes commitment and a total change in the way we think and what we do.


I looked a little further and I came across this- here I am last Christmas. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin,so I can imagine how I made others feel. I still have a ways to go, but I am not dissatisfied with my progress either.

We are all in charge of our own lives, and  if we want to make life hard, well we can do that, but no one has anyone to blame but themselves.100_6985

So whether it be all the anxiety of gifts and preparations for Christmas, or whether it is what you are going to do in your professional life, or our personal life, journeys can be long and we need to remember that we are responsible for our actions.

As I look at the health issues and obesity, I am thankful I have not had complication that were irreversible, I am glad that I have tried to eat sensibly- I am thankful that blood pressure meds and cholesterol meds are no longer in Marks meds he takes every day. I am glad that this weekend ends the 2010 Christmas chaos and that it is not a blizzard outside.

But you know what… I am thankful for the magic I got to see in the kids eyes this Christmas. I am thankful that tomorrow the kids come out here for a few hours and we chill. 100_6845

And I am thrilled that we made it, all of us, somehow, we got through the hustle and bustle , we got through the money issues and we are on the other side. A place where more focus is on day to day living and not all the extra stuff.

Don’t get me wrong- I truly love Christmas time…. I am not doing a Grinch thing—I am just feeling the end of the 100 mile an hour feeling, I am just  looking forward to normalcy returning to life, and for the gym being opened ( it was closed today)

Tomorrow afternoon, it shall be fun… a nice way to end the long weekend.

Next weekend we are blessed to have all three grandkids over with their parents- and another time to accomplish controlling what I eat, what I do…

Be safe out there, enjoy each day and each person along your journey… but most of all— be good to YOU. Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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