trust


After we came back from the first family reunion,100_1023 which was my side of the family,3 weeks later  we went to a camp site North East of Lockport NY and had our family reunion with our kids and our kids kids.

This is the 2nd year we have done this and it is really nice to do it.

We can focus on one another and being less people it is a great way for the cousins to play together and our kids to spend time together.

Life is so darn short, life is so darn busy, we just do not get together enough. We were there for 2 full days, leaving on the third day in the morning. 100_1065As I look back at the time I think I was most moved by just watching the interactions and realizing that all of this could not have been possible without Marks and my children. Adrianne and her kids came out on the 1st full day we were there for an afternoon and evening, her husband unfortunately was not feeling good and could not make it. She said maybe next year she will plan to camp the full time too… It was awesome to spend time with them.

The other part that was special to me was 100_1061some one on one time I was able to spend with Emily. Emily is now 16 and being a teen is not easy ever, I think it is tougher in 2013 than it was when I was a teen. Emily is a smart young lady and she has a pretty good sense of humor. I just like spending time with her. That was special.

I also love time with our kids and their spouses, it is so neat to watch them interact, like they just saw each other the day before, we did miss Josh though. The time separated seems to disappear. And their kids – our grandkids are funny to watch. Jeff and Amanda’s kids are 3 and almost 5 and Adrianne and Josh’s kids are almost 2 and 4. 100_1053So they go right up the totem pole of toddler ages. They walked around, they rode bikes, they watched as we tried to fly kites, they played until they dropped with exhaustion. The magic of the fire, the wonder of the sunset, the toasting of s’mores, the memories are priceless.

I feel blessed to have this opportunity and I look back at all the bumps in the road, the hills of life climbed, the slopes sometimes slipped on—they all led us to here. And ya know what— every tear, every smile, every wonder, every pray— it was all worth it. 100_1114

Until the next post…. hang on to the blessings that come before you..watch for the simplest things that mean so much. Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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June 2013 029Well it has been a very long while since I popped over here to this home of my thoughts. Life seems to be a little chaotic, a lot busy and sometimes full of unpredictable things.

Work is good, it is never ever boring, and very fast pace. Changes within the government on healthcare reform, changes in medical treatments and advances in current treatments and medications, it is always an opportunity to learn more new stuff.

Mark and I will occasionally go to Oswego and watch the sun set. It is so darn peaceful up there, and a place to kind of put life in a temporary hold pattern. Sunsets and the time just before them is a favorite time of day for both of us.

It is a time when the world slowly changes yet I feel I can stop.

It is a time to reflect on the day passing behind us, and planning for the day that is yet to be.

It almost feels like no matter what happened- it is a closing of a chapter and an opportunity to start a new chapter- fresh.

It is a time to relax and June 2013 042know that the bed is not too many hours away.

My days are busy, I really love my job, and the people I work with are good people. So all that together makes an environment where a day is something to look forward to doing. Have you ever been in a situation you hated? Boy the day drags, the clock seems like a minute is an hour.

I am so thankful that I have the days that fly by!.However, as the days fly by, that means the years fly by.

Our grand children are growing fast, our 1005886_10201429826646558_1989262251_n[1]little guy Brandon just had pre-k graduation! We were able to get to it, the school had it in the evening.  It was so cool to see how hard the class worked for this.They sang a variety of songs, choreographed, and one with even sign language too.

Wow next year kindergarten.

 

And this weekend our niece is graduating from high school. Gee whiz… time flies.

But fortunately as time flies, we learn lessons, we learn that things in life do not always have to matter, we learn that life is short, we learn that there is a reason for everything, sometimes it takes a lifetime to try to figure it out.

This weekend is the “Strawberry Moon” as it was referred to in the news article today. Tomorrow it is supposed to be the best night to see it. I can not wait. For somewhere in the child part of my brain, many many year ago, I found comfort in believing those who had died , those who meant something to me, that they could sit on the moon and watch over me. I refuse to let that comfort go. Tomorrow night- I will be watching the moon, waving to my mom, dad, sister and grandparents…. making loving faces to our dogs and cats…. and trying to capture the moment on film. I hope you too can see it….what ever it will look like. Lots of love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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I look at these buildings, they are very old buildings, and they were made by people with work ethic. They had to have strong ethic…To carry stones and blocks and mortar, to precisely lay each piece, to build a structure that withstands all seasons…. they worked hard and succeeded.

We have a niece and her husband who live in Vermont. She is a teacher, he works on s ski slope grooming trails in the winter at all kinds of weird hours , he does various things at the ski slope…. and they have a farm, and they run a co-op..they are 2 people who have learned work ethic. They live a full life , with many responsibilities, and seem to love life.

100_0499My husband has incredible work ethic. Before he was injured, he worked 6 days a week sometimes, driving a 18 wheeler around this country, on time for every load.. and he did it whether he was sick or healthy… he just did it.. and did it well.

I was watching some cams of doggie day cares at lunch today..and I saw a variety of people working at them. At some ..the dogs are just there… the places looked crammed, and plain…. the employees are just leaning against the wall..like they are holding the wall up. One guy was scratching his back, his belly…and acting super uninterested…The dogs all laying around, or sitting and staring. Like they are biding time until something happens. They actually look bored.

While other places the dogs  are playing,the places looks like they are fun… the dogs are  interacting with each other and with the people. The employees are bending down and petting the different dogs. They are mopping the floor if someone has an accident. They are walking with a spring in their step. These people have great work ethic.

I am always amazed when a person acts as if their work is their when it is convenient for their life… instead of their life needs to be at work—when they are supposed to be at work… and at home when they are not at work.

Some people believe they have a right to having their cell phones on, and their electronic devices on all day. I know of a teacher who states that all the kids have their cell phones on and do not feel they need to turn them off.They slouch and scuff as they walk, as if school is an inconvenience… . Can you believe it !!!.

… have you ever gone somewhere and the employee puts you on the back burner because they just got a personal call? 100_0494We need to teach our children, our grandchildren how to be responsible adults, How to know the they get out of life what they put into it. And they are not entitled to everything.

We need to smarten up folks… demonstrate what hard work is. And help to mold the youth of today into people who will succeed in the future.. People who learn to work with their hands and not to just reach out for others to put something in them. It is not too late….

Love to all,. Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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A true sign of warmer weather breathing down our necks.. the camper is coming home from storage today.

We had it at a B&C Storage place that has 3 sided, roofed enclosures.388629_10200999677053087_17889525_n[2] The trailer looks great..so it was worth the $$ to do it.
Next year we have bought a cover for it and will see how it fairs a winter outside but covered. IT IS EXPENSIVE to store these things!. About 700.00 a year. So hopefully the cover will suffice for a couple years and we can save $$ from storing it.

This has been an interesting last few weeks for me, it kind of feels like everything is happening fast in life. Lots to do, the world spins quicker… guess maybe it is just because at work we are busy, lots of changes, lots of new things, lots of work.

Home we are trying a new budget system and trying to make sure while entering info on the budget that we are remembering to do the bank stuff too—well sometimes it feels like I am missing something.

We ordered one of those”Flex hoses” the kind that fits in the palm of your hand and supposedly shrinks into a ball when not in use… We did go out and play with it a little.. it is not quite as dramatic as the commercial..5-19-2012 east coast with the boys for the day 061but it does shrink up to about 1/4 its size… Maybe we are just not totally professional with it yet…

We have the camper in the driveway and it will be probably  about 6 weeks before we are back camping again. We decided to grass seed the garden…. and go to the farmers market instead. There is nothing more disappointing than anticipating a crop… and than have squash bores and tomato blithe take away a good percentage of the garden… It is fun to go out and pick what we need..but it is time consuming and I do not think our soil is enriched with the right  nutrients  for a garden.

Tomorrow Is TacO Ring Day…. 428004_135910806572684_1339169542_n[1]

It is a new recipe.. hopefully it comes out as good as this looks…

I will post a photo of our masterpiece… if it is photogenic.

I am SOOOO glad Winter is pretty much behind us.. the snow totals were much more than last year…

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Redfield got 4 feet of snow in one storm a couple weeks ago.. before that I think we were close to them—which is unusual..as they usually get lots more than we do…

 

Today we emptied our push salter… we put all but one shovel away… unplugged the heat tape…..and moved the park bench from next to the house wall to the front yard… NOOOOWWWWW if we could just move the temps up about 20 degrees… than I will truly believe SPRING has SPRUNG…

Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

I read a book a few weeks ago and it has created all sorts of emotions and thoughts. The book was written by a survivor of child abuse. This is the cover of the book… img-thing[1]

I kid you not, it was VERY hard to read, but I was not going to stop. WHY?? Because this poor little boy..who miraculously made it through years of torture to become a man—well he could not quit from what his life was.

As I read this, my heart ached, I was so darn angry with social services and the mother… with the brothers and step dad…. 

The presentation of how things were on the outside of the house, in no way were really what was happening behind closed doors.

As I read it, I thought that most kids probably never grow up to share what they went through, to show they survived… No , I am thinking most kids would have died in the torture. The mom put on a front that the child was evil, the child was aggressive, the child was mean, the child had problems, the child was mute… AND it was easier for those on the outside to label the child instead of trying to figure out what made the child act the way he did…

I think we  do that in society.. we tend to take the easy way out. This got me to think about Riley… our dog. Riley comes home 6-29-2012 028She had such lost sad eyes when we brought her home that day from the kennel…..… She cowered when you called her, she shook and trembled if she thought she was in trouble, she had a sense of fear to her…

She had horrible separation anxiety, she panicked, she hyperventilated, she literally freaked out if we left the house.

We made comments about “That is why her previous owners abandoned her” and “She has issues.” ///But ya know what—we did not give up on her…( We almost did !!)fortunately we got thinking and  we did not just accept the way she was as a final.. That breaks my heart at the thought that we almost gave up on her.

After her 2 weeks in early winter at the K9 training camp—2 weeks of not seeing her, of her being treated well, but like a dog… she is okay now. We can leave her in the house, no crate or cage….  and go out for up to 6 hrs..she is fine. We do not have to limit her access to rooms.. she is a calmer dog…. , and seems more controlled  now.. It was what her previous owners did to her that made her how she was… not that she was bad.

She is a sweetheart… she loves to be with us,she is GREAT with people and the grandkids….. she is playful….  but now it is ok when we leave. She goes to doggie playcare 1 day a week, and they say she darts around for the entire time, frolicking, running.. non stop.

How many kids…. how many pets… have we as a society let down? Why… because it was easier to say they had the problem… than to figure out what made the behavior….. easier than to try to fix it…

yep, that book will live with me for a very long time… And Joe Peters’…. wherever you are…. I am so sorry for the let down you must have felt over and over again.and thank you for sharing this …. it really opened my eyes…

Love to all… Mrs Justa alias Cindy

Rileys bent crate and having the boys over 11-17-12 014Have you ever just wanted to run…run and run and run?

Nowhere in particular to go, just not wanting to be where you are at.

Last week felt like that I think for everyone around me. Mark would have loved to run from himself, me, I would have loved to run from the stress of the week…and

Now that I think of it.. even Riley tried to break clean of her fears and panic…..

Rileys bent crate and having the boys over 11-17-12 001

This is Riley’s crate. She is terrified of being left in the crate, and yet she has not proven she is much nicer to the house outside of the crate. So if we had to leave for a while, we crated her….

If you look at the bottom of the crate, she bends it in by biting it, sticking her nose in it and trying to scooch out of it with the door closed and locked. This time she bent it enough in that she literally was scratching at that rug, she got the rug inside the crate and started gnawing on it, trying anything to escape from the crate. So.. the crate is folded up… Riley is on some antidepressants/ Obsessive compulsive meds to see if we can get her to overcome this panic disorder she gets when being left alone.

It really is sad to think that for some reason she is terrified of the crate. If I could find her original owners,RIley 7-19-2012 003 the ones that had to have been mean to her… well I would Have a few things to say to them. Might even smack them aside of their head!

How can people be cruel to another living being?

She is the sweetest dog, she loves to be with people, it is funny ..at night if she gets cold, she burrows under the blanket and sheet and sleeps way down at our feet. She will stay there for hrs.

She is great with the kids, she loves her stuffed animals, LOVES her food, yet deep inside her psychie— someone played with her head…. if she thinks you are angry with her..she cowers…… If you raise your voice out of emotion for anything – she thinks it is for her….

She belly crawls if she thinks she is in trouble. SO our dilemma in life is we have a dog..who hates when we leave. I have a call into the NY State dog whisperer..and we are going to see if he thinks this is something he could assist with. We also are going to try to get her into a doggie day care a couple times a week..and if there is a need for a few hrs of being watched as we try to come to a solution—than we will see if her kennel down the Oswego NY  6-11-12 003street would let her stay for a day.

So as our persistence to get to an end of her fear..

we need to STOP..and work with her.. Patience, positive reinforcement , determination, and slow down…go slow and make sure she feels comfortable along the way.

Please if you have a chance, and feel a tug in your heart… say a prayer for our little girl dog..and hope we can help her become at ease…. all the time.

Love to all….Mrs Justa alias Cindy

I wonder what the world will be100_2850 like when our grandkids are in their 60s? It is a kinda weird thought. By then I know I will be dust in the wind… what will our grandkids have to deal with?

Will there still be this great nation? Will people actually talk to one another? Or will conversation be 2 dimensional, type it, speak it into a device and away it goes?

We have some friends, they have adult children, and those kids still call my husband Mr. Krusen. It does not matter how old they have become, Mark is still older and they show respect.

I have a person in my life, she has always been to me “mom #2”, not because I disowned my mom, but more because she came into my life in my pre-teen years, after my dad had died, and my mom- God Bless her heart..was trying to get an education and support a family of 6 young kids…. as I said a few posts ago..that made my sister Pam and I they care givers for a lot of the days and evenings. Being 10 and 11 when he passed.. we needed a mom… and when this woman moved into our neighborhood… she was someone I could go and talk to…ask questions that I needed answers to… and to this day… I call her Mrs. Fields. I would never argue with her, not even today. She is my elder. We were taught to respect our elders. But I worry with e mails, texting, social networks, …somehow the elders..the respect for them..well that seems like it has disappeared. It is like everyone s trying to get the last word, age does not matter…. slam each other back and forth. Shut the device off..go to another site..and never think about age, respect or end result.

So in 50 + yrs..where will this all lead to? It is so darn impersonal right now..and we are just beginning.

I joked that to have coffee with a friend—save on gas… skype them. But how much of a joke is that? Ya can not touch another’s hand, or see their eyes, or give them a hug thru skype or other communication ways.

There is nothing more dear to me than having a grandchild run to me and say “I love you gramma”…and than try to wrap their tiny arms around me…

I am glad we are still able to100_2224 see our grandkids in person, to talk face to face with our friends, and I just hope as these youth of today grow up..they remember that a card in the mail is better than a wish on face book… picking up a phone and talking is better than texting…and spending time with someone face to face…instead of face into a screen of a smart phone, I pad or computer is what life is about !!.

May you each find comfort in 3 dimensional relationships….interactions…

Love to all.. Mrs Justa…. alias Cindy

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