A Date Night To Remember

The longer Mark and I have been together, the less times we refer to a journey here or there as a date night. BUT last weekend, Memorial Weekend… we went on a date night.

It was kinda neat to think we labeled this adventure as a date night, a couple who have been together for 37 yrs almost, but never the less it was our next in a rather long line of ” Mark and Cindys Excellent Adventures”

We were going to the Drive In- yep just like old times, a coolish night, a movie on a big screen with the sounds echoing through the air and car.

We decided to head over with over with an hour and a 1/2 to spare, so that we could avoid long lines getting into see the movie. So we got comfortable clothes for a possible 54 degree evening and off we went. It was a little different than what I had remembered before. Oh there were different groups of people playing frisbee and catch, just like I had remembered from going early to drive ins years ago, but what seemed a tad strange to me was there seemed to be more people parking backwards, and more people setting up lounge chairs and blankets, and settling in for the movie.

Another thing I had noticed were no speakers, yeah that was a tad different. Back in the day….. there were bulky type metal speakers that were on post. A car on each side of the poles and the speaker hooked onto the drivers window. Now only the poles the speakers used to be on So we acclimated ourselves to the NEW WORLD way. We found out that there was a set FM frequency that was used to send the sound through your car radio. There was a upbeat sounding guy on the sound system explaining that all you had to do was leave your car in accessory mode for the movie, tune your radio to a certain set frequency and not to fret, it shouldn’t run your battery down, but just in case, they had helpers to jump start your car.

So all is good, yep this will be fine. We went to the snack bar, ordered a sandwich and drink, and got ready for our date night. Top gun Maverick was ready to begin. Our windows up, our car in accessory mode, the radio set and volume just right and we were ready to watch the movie that was being spoken about as awesome.

Just before the movie started the the upbeat announcer was again assuring all that accessory mode is the way to go, he added a little additional information. He said the movies are about to begin. From now on, no headlights, brake lights while the movie is going, and when you do leave, do not tap your brakes, leave headlights off, please leave your parking lights on until you totally exit the drive in area. GOT IT !

So the movie starts, our radio in the car is set, we are ready to soar the skies with Tom Cruise. It all seemed to be going well, until………. 1 hr and 15 minutes into the movie our dome lights light up, the car goes out of accessory mode , our driving lights automatically come on and we are there like an unwelcome beacon in the night. Unfortunately I only have two hands, and we have 3 VERY BRIGHT dome lights glaring in the car.

Now what do we do? We can’t shut off the driving lights, the dome lights were brighter than 3 spot lights, people were looking over from the car next to us, the car is off, and no accessory mode. We had no idea what to do. Now being a newer keyless car, the only way to start it is with the brake on. We can’t open our doors, because the driving lights change to head lights to show you the way into the darkness when you get home…….So Mark and I decide that this was a good time to leave, as we couldn’t hear the movie, we were lighting up the place, and lets just say it was no longer the neat date night.

So he put his foot on the brake to start the car, and boy were they bright !!!( it was slow to start !!) and off we went. We did laugh all the way home about what a strange date night that was… the old folks night out on the town !

Needless to say, now I know why people were sitting outside their cars, as they must have brought FM radios, boom boxes, or small portable radios to get the sound from. That will be our next additional item should we dare try that again.

Yep, just another chapter in “Mark and Cindy’s Excellent Adventures” . Ya gotta love it.

Until late, Mrs Justa ..alias CIndy

 

Another of Life Situations #??!!

How we handle situations is our choice. We can get really frustrated, or take a deep breath, and realize it is the way it is, and react in the most positive way possible. Now the most positive way just brings the reaction a tad away from sometimes screaming, wanting to stomp our feet or saying things we did not want to say.

Today I took a 1/2 day off. The temperature was going to be in the 50s, and we wanted to bring a few things to a very special person, a surprise of sorts. We are about an hour into the trip and Mark and I were both thinking the same thing—- we put the things in a gift bag, but it has a Christmas theme… what if we take those special items out of the gift bag, and transfer them to a regular canvas bag, so as not to give the impression it was for Christmas, avoiding the awkward feelings of them not having something for us… .

See years ago we had stopped buying adult friends and each other Christmas gifts because we and basically every adult we knew got things they wanted and needed throughout the year. The pressure and stress of making sure that we got the right gift, of not forgetting someone, getting something the other wanted,  worrying that the other didn’t spend more, feeling flustered over what they wanted- it became the focus instead of what Christmas is about. So the gifts, well we get special gifts for the kids.

Other than that, we really do not exchange gifts except 🙂 at the Christmas Eve gathering at my brother and his wife’s home. They graciously have a Christmas Eve stroganoff family gathering and all adults and teens get a $20.00 gift. It is a $20.00 gift that goes under the tree. No labeling. It is meant to be a gift that is serious not a gag gift. And something that if you got it back- well you would love it. We all draw numbers, and each person will take a gift starting at the poor sucker who is number one. As each person opens the gift they chose, they can look around at already opened gifts and swap with someone who already opened a gift. So theoretically that number one person does not want to get attached to the gift they opened because it could get taken from you, and then the next person down who opens a gift might want the gift poor number one got in the last swap. Being these are the only gifts we get, we really like the thoughtfulness that goes into the gift someone else put into their purchase.

So back to today…. we wanted to take advantage of the warm weather and bring these things to her. We stopped 1/2 way there, we grab one of our canvas bags, and go to do the switch, only to realize, we have the wrong bag. At first, I am thinking we could turn around, and add another 2 hrs to this venture, that thought went before I even said it. Then I was really upset with me because I was who took the one gift bag and put it by the door to make sure we remembered it.

I looked at Mark, anticipating his disappointment but instead, he said well, I guess we’ll have to go back another time. Then we were thinking that we can just mail them. He tried to comfort me, he did not display anger or disappointment, ( even if he felt like it cuz I know I did ) he could tell I was bumming big time, and he said it will be fine.

Now as we continued our venture, I begin to get out of the moment and into the future. THANK GOD we decided to stop, intending to move the gifts to the canvas bag. Crap can you imagine the scenario if she had been handed this bag, took out the gift, and I am thinking holy crap, what would our expressions have been? How awkward, ya can’t tell a person that it really wasn’t for them, or laugh it off and take it back….and it was not something that would have even been meant for her. I am sure graciously she might have said- ” Oh thank you” or “oh you shouldn’t have” with a kind of questioning tone and wondering what were we thinking.!!! So as we proceeded down the highway, we had a nice visit, and well the things we have, we can get to her later.

The gift that almost wasn’t, is in the car, and I truly believe that had a dab of spiritual intervention. The scenarios of how it could have been are laughable now… it was a nice drive down, a nice visit, and the gift that almost wasn’t- well it still is…

I hope you find the holiday season memorable, enjoy the people, the laughter and take time to remember what Christmas is about.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Interacting and Technology

So as I was making my weekly grocery list on a pad of real paper, with an actual pen, I was thinking- hey I could just go online, and order this all.. and …. nope— STOP…. I am going to continue to go out and shop for groceries. I enjoy seeing others, I enjoy making sure what we are buying is what we intended to buy, …

Well, this got me thinking… I think as the world continues to advance, to become more virtual, we have to remember to have real-life experiences. We need to interact with face to face, real life, and reach out and touch moments.

To see peoples face on face time is a great tool, because people can be in places you can not be, and have a conversation with them. However, doing face time with people that are just a few miles away, well I feel that going outside and seeing them might be the option to take.

We can now go to our computer, cell phone, tablet or probably talk in the air to “Alexa” or “Google” devices, give a list of things we need from the store, and have it delivered to our doorstep, or have someone waiting to load it in our car.

Instead of face to face, touch the items, one can buy virtually anything without going out and seeing it. And God forbid it not be what we expected from the image online we ordered it from. Instead, had we just gone to a local vendor, a store, a warehouse and seen it, felt it, looked it over, well then we know what we are buying.

Now everyone ( including me) can make all the excuses and reasons why this is so great. It keeps me away from germs of others, I do not need to deal with long lines, it gives me more time to fill up my day with a bunch of other stuff. Heck before we know it we have fit what used to be 36 hrs of actions in an 18 hr day.

We do not have to go to a movie- nope we can sit in the comfort of our home and watch the movie, stop it when we want, and put it back on after we pee, or grab a drink, or stretch, AND we can watch it in our jammies. Now I am not saying this is wrong, it does, however, take away the “going out to a move” experience. The smell of the popcorn, the darkness as you sit on seats in rows that are on an inclining floor.

There is nothing that replaces taking a trip to a planetarium. The music, the narrator, the feeling you are in a spaceship in orbit as they show us the universe, the night sky.

To show a child a firefly cupped in your hand, or to show them virtually via a YouTube image– well the magic is definitely in the first option.

 

Playing games, yes real hands-on , touch the pieces, not only hear the voice of your opponent but to see their eyes, to laugh in the same room, that is so much a component of that experience. Oh I know we can get games and our opponent is part of the game, we had this one game where we could choose the country and type of opponent we wanted. A man calling you “Chap” to a down-under voice teasing when they are about to whomp you. It, however, takes away the real socialization.

Virtual convenience is nice, however, we as adults, our kids, our grandkids, our friends, we also need to keep our social skills up, we need to take advantage of the value of being real- in real time… to be able to interact and not feel lost in the world.

We can in balance embrace the various incredible things that are available to us, things to make our life easier… yet we need to be aware of what is important at the end of the day, what is a need, what are we doing as a “cop-out” or because it is just less demanding of our time… and what is a want.

Thoughts to ponder…. Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

 

Responsibility

 

Another day is dawning,  memories to be made, impressions to leave, moments unchangeable.

As the day begins, as the next step is about to happen, the next minute here among us, I am thinking about life and the effects we have on it.

 

RESPONSIBILITY:  We all are responsible for our actions. This goes for every single thing we do. We can not choose which things we do we are and are not responsible for. Nope, we own each thing we do.

That is a huge responsibility. Why, because sometimes the things we do, we don’t even realize or think about the end result, we get wrapped up in a moment or jump on the proverbial “bandwagon”. However, as we travel down the twists and turns of life’s journey,  and at the end of our road in life, it is us and us alone who individually made choices.

I say this because of many reasons, many reasons I myself have chosen to do things, and once they were done, well there was no rewind, no “gee I didn’t mean to be that way, or “I didn’t mean to do that” or “I didn’t mean to _______”.  The “I wish I had” thoughts do not count.

There have been things I have said, I can not take back. Actions I did, I can not undo. As a nurse, I have cared for patients who would say, “I knew better” or “If I only had never smoked” or “I took the chance ____”   Notice the similarity– “If I only had not or didn’t”

My parents would say to me when I did something I totally should not have, “You know better than that” or ” Bet you won’t do that again” or “what did you learn from that?”. And as I was growing up, she would wipe the wound ( physical or not) and guide me through the why’s and maybe even have suggestions on how to deal with that scenario in the future. They were preparing me for my future.

As we grow up we are still responsible for our actions. There are consequences to what is done, said, or ignored. If any of us are asked to do something and we say we will, if we then do it halfway, or not appropriately – if we take a risk, a dare—- we cannot go back and get those minutes to undo it.

In our roles in life, ( being a friend, an adult, a mentor, a stranger, a human being ) whether at work or in any environment around us, writing anything in social media, in an article,  we can not take it back. It paints a picture of us that can not be painted over, the “delete” does not remove words or photos or actions done.

Our reactions to something said or done, we can not undo that either. In life I have found to tread softly at times, to think before doing or saying, and to appreciate and take responsibility to every minute I am on this earth.

What image are we giving? What actions are we doing? What consequences because of those actions, or lack of actions are there? What image have I left?

Those are my thoughts this morning, something I will remember as I get ready for another day to be the best I can be.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

Challenges or a Way Of Life

On any given day, I can look out the window and think “Oh look, the sun is up”…. period… But no- there is more… see beyond the noticing of the sunrise in the quiet of things in front of me was a glistening world of diamond-like sparkles. A cold crisp early morning gift, a gift that many may have not seen, a gift that can turn into a snowy plain ol day.

 

 

 

 

Yet, right there for all to see, a refreshing light show of sparkling colors.

It brought once again to mind thought about life. How when we are faced with things that seem monumental, we look at the proverbial mountain ( or in this case maybe a quick noticing the sun is rising) and we are overwhelmed at the tasks at hand at the end of a particular journey. Sometimes it is easier to dwell on that obstacle, which takes us longer to put it behind us.

Life can feel like it is hard at times, life is full of mountains to climb, sometimes valleys to drudge through. Plenty of times I have slipped on the proverbial mountain wandered off the proverbial path and had to retrace my steps, maybe find a slightly less challenging path to go on.

There was one person in my life that told me once she never had challenges in life. I remember thinking “heck let me share some with you” but I did not offer, and she never asked to take a few from me, so I have gone on in life realizing that at least for me, challenges exist, they can be heart wrenching, they can be touch and we conquer them one by one step at a time.

Photo by Alex Smith on Pexels.com

As I look back at this person who said this to me, as I came to know her a tad bit more many yrs ago, I now wonder- maybe just maybe she had the ability to look at those diamond-like crystals, and not just at that sunrise from afar. I think that because I truly believe we ALL face moments when life has tried to knock us down.

Maybe this person was able to anticipate but not look for that next roadblock or detour on her journey of life. If we know that challenges will lie ahead, but if we look at them as not roadblocks but the way the path takes us, then maybe we too can feel that life has been good, no matter what part of our journey we are on.

I, myself, and going to try to work on this. As I take each next step on this road of life, I will anticipate some bumps and hairpin curves, knowing the road will straighten up. To now look so far ahead, but to look at now and a few feet ahead. Not so much only living for today,, but planning for tomorrow and in those plans, the “challenges” will become part of the process.

OK, I am off to try this out, Until alter… Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

“I Already Know”

I guess I never thought about this until I heard it a whole bunch of times in different settings this Thanksgiving weekend.

I saw myself doing it, and also heard it done to others. First, let me say all the social media outlets CAN BE wonderful when used as a means to give many “friends, family and acquaintances” the same bullet point information at one time. A way to create a page not yet colored in that person’s life.

Let’s say you graduated or had a baby or an exciting time at _______,  it is to share an extremely tough time or the passing of a person that you would never have known about, or a way to type in a verse or 2 about the loss you have endured. It is something, some time had it not been shared on f.b., twitter, or any of the others outlets to communicate.

It is a great way to share photos of a gathering many attended, or maybe that perfect moment you stumbled on. Those times when without sharing on social media, well it would never have been experienced in a very 2D way.

Looking at this picture- one that was probably on a facebook post, it shows a wedding, but without the personal touch, the conversation, the painting done with words, there is so much more that can fill in the outline of a “wedding”

If, however, someone starts face to face- or voice to voice on the phone- about something- well that is the beginning of an opportunity to converse. They want to make that 2D, quick blurb into a 3D moment. Voices, faces they add expression to the time they are referring to, or to the sad or happy moment captured and shared. That person wanted to put color into the social media bullet point. We ( and I can not count the times I did it) can stop the conversation, we can keep that moment just a bullet point in time, we can portrait we do not really care by interrupting- or making our first ( and often our last) response by saying ” Yeah , I already know” or “Yeah,I saw it on f.b.” .

Now if the same person starts the conversation and mentions they also had it on Facebook, ( or whatever media they put it on) we need to stop and listen. That conversation you are about to be blessed with, well it adds the personal component.

Or if you see that person, you could always start the conversation with that tidbit of their life they shared. An opportunity to bring a personal touch to a moment they shared on facebook. That can be a great time to show you care and want to hear more.

We will never ever know what we missed if we close that opportunity to have color added to social media bullet points if we stop the conversation before the colors fill in the moment in their life.

My mission for today and going forward is to let the other person not only bring up the topic but to let them take that outline, that bullet point, and add their words to it, their nonverbals, their feelings.

Until later, Mrs. Justa/ alias Cindy

 

“Times of our Lives”

There was a very popular song from the mid-1970s that Paul Anka had done and Kodak used it as an advertising jingle. The lyrics are very meaningful to me- and as I take photographs and look at photos from times gone by, as I reminisce on times captured in the Windows or my mind and heart, well this melody and its’  words- it plays in my head.

“Good morning, yesterday
You wake up and time has slipped away
And suddenly it’s hard to find
The memories you left behind
Remember, do you remember?

The laughter and the tears
The shadows of misty yesteryears
The good times and the bad you’ve seen
And all the others in between
Remember, do you remember
The times of your life? ………..

Reach out for the joy and the sorrow
Put them away in your mind
The memories are times that you borrow
To spend when you get to tomorrow

The seasons are passing one by one
So gather moments while you may
Collect the dreams you dream today
…….. will you remember
The times of your life?

……….
Do you remember the times of your life?”

For me, as this weekend with family enters its last day and a half, the moments already created and those yet to come, I want to remember the laughter, the realization that we were all placed in the places we are now, because of the roads we have traveled. My wish is that everyone has those moments, those “TImes of Your Life”, that can play over and over again as the days become moments in our journey, little monuments or landscapes.

Until later, Mrs. Justa alias Cindy

 

Practice creates ……

I was thinking this past week about learning something new or doing something repetitively and what is the end result.

Last weekend, we had the Black Belt Ceremony I mentioned a few posts back. Those individuals did not just wake up one morning and poof could work in synchronization with a stage full of other, they couldn’t make those moves and stay focused just by thinking about it.

This thought surfaces a lot to me. Everywhere we go, what we see, our jobs, our walking, driving, interactions, those improve often by doing them over and over again. This becomes even deeper of a thought when we get into every day.

I was reminded the other day of our day to day life. While I was in a waiting room, I overheard a person say on her cell phone that she prefers to text people, and not have them call her. She said to the person on the phone something about being more comfortable communicating that way, she can put down what she wants without to SAY.

That comment she made, well it made me think about all the things we have at our fingertips to make life easier, to be able to move at a faster pace. Each thing has its benefits- however, they should not replace the more personal, hands-on, practicing talent, task, interactions or skill.

When I have been trained, and when I have trained others. The teaching included showing the pieces to the action being taught, having the other demonstrate the action/ talent/ skill being taught, and letting the trainee do it themselves over and over again, but having the steps checked until it is assured they know it more naturally. I currently am going through one of those teachings, showing and demonstrating times in my life. Learning a new role at work, listening, taking notes, seeing it done, and having the “baton” passed so I can demonstrate I am becoming more comfortable and confident in each step. As the days pass, and I look back a couple months, I realize how far I have come, yet am realistic at the journey ahead as more processes and steps are introduced and one day become something I am proficient at.

Even though life is like that, we need to make darn sure before we take the “easy” way, we have personally become comfortable in a more personal way. We need also to understand practice makes us more proficient. From learning how to walk, and being able to walk… to learning how to add, subtract, speak in an intellectual conversation, cook, doing a game, reading a book, the list is infinite.

Virtual meetings, training, communicating makes so much of life so much better. We can jot a thought in an instant message at 2AM, and the other person can get it whenever they are awake…  Yet, there is a fine line when we could realize that our personal relationships, our whole life has become virtual. If life gets to a point when we could move away, go to a different city, state, country, and our life would be the same, no one would even know we moved, that is a  message that we have not only taken advantage of the virtual life conveniences, we have let them take over us.

When was the last time you …. fill in the blank? And if the power was off / the internet down/ ( that list goes on and on too) … do you know how to improvise?

When was the last time you looked into a personal eyes and spoke – face to face? When was the last time you touched a deck of cards or held a book? Have you ever done a no electronics evening or weekend?

Even though the modern conveniences make life able to be more productive, more chaotic, more impersonal, we need to stop and not let it replace the 3D life we are blessed with. I would rather hold a child’s hand, then hold a cell phone and screen chat. I would rather sit at a table and play a game of ( the list is so long… ie: cards, Yahtzee, Scrabble, Sorry, Trouble….. and on and on) than to only ever play it on my electronic device.

Yes, the books on our electronic devices are great, and being able to do a 1000 piece puzzle and never worry about that one lost piece or someone messing it up… those are all great. I just do not to ever become so dependent on the “no touch” that it becomes me.

As this weekend begins, I am looking forward to what the day will bring, who will I personally see face to face? Who will I talk to and not type my words to? What will I do that is hands on? What will I remember more vividly because of those one to one moments? I am off to experience life and all there is in the minutes ahead.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

 

 

 

 

Words and a memory

Continuing on the subject of words. I wanted to share a time from long ago.

We lived in Spafford NY in my first few yrs of elementary school. We had one car and my dad was a traveling salesman. So living FAR away from the school did not leave an option for our mom driving us.

It was a long bus ride, and it brings back fun and not so fun times. One thing was our last name became the laughing subject for the first few miles of each journey. We would no sooner get on the bus and certain kids would ask if we have Gaines Gravy Train for dinner and if we eat it dry in the morning. Their pals would wait for a reaction as they laughed at the words said and observed to see if they got a reaction.

We would tell mom about the trip, but what really could she do, but provide advice and call the bus garage. So her words of wisdom ( and I say that with the sincerest most meaning of the words) she said just stand tall, be proud and say back:  “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names will never hurt me”

Well, I gotta tell ya, that had a nice ring to it, but really did not do anything to stop the name mocking. Nope just kinda fueled the laughter as people said things like “What was that can you say it again?” And me – in my proud Gaines Family fashion would repeat it.

What changed was Pam and I became able to hide the sadness and dislike, and that, and only that slowed down the mocking. It never totally went away because “Gaines Dog Food ” folks were coming up with cute adds and more products. We advanced to questions like “Did you have burgers last night… GAINES BURGERS?”

Yep, words can be powerful, and being I woke up this morning with the kid’s laughter running through my mind, I felt it needed to be shared.

Lesson learned from this, as a parent I was listening for mention from our kids, and if there was any hint of something like this happening to them, I worked to explain that when we react to words, we are giving strength to the people calling you a name. If you react, the others have found a way to annoy you. DO not react, as hard as that is, and their game is no longer anything more than solitaire. Their words come out and get lost in space.

As I move into today, I hope the day is good for you. Words can be so powerful.

Until later, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

Words

Words are very powerful. Words can inspire a person to go further, to try to find the next step, to get up the next day. Words from a child are so precious, words to a child can help to create thoughts and inspire them to explore, to learn.

Words in our lives, some flow through and we are unaffected by them. Others though, they are stopped in the heart, the soul, and can create wonderful things to happen.

Words are also very powerful, and once said, we can not take them back. We can not dash over and block them from being heard. My life’s lessons have taught me many things, little things and not so little. One of the messages embedded in my being is that it is so important to think before I speak ( or write).

Once I release a word or series of them, I can not retrieve them. And so it is also true that once words are said to another, that other person has them, and it is they who receive them and how they perceive the words are meant.

So as today begins, I am focusing on the words from me, and remembering that a word can be as soft as a fluffy pillow, or sharper than the sharpest knife, only owned by me until I release them. It is a lesson in life I truly believe some people have discarded, or ignored, and others have become proficient in the art or using words.

Think back for a moment, what words have been said to you, that are now saved in gold in your heart and mind.  As the day begins, as each next day of our lives go on, what words do we want to be remembered by someone else, for the rest of their lives? Words are a powerful tool.

Until the next post… Mrs Justa alias Cindy

 

WIth Bad, There Comes Good

Whoa, this is a tough concept to grasp. Personally, I am surprised I have any teeth left after the times’ life has kicked me in them. I would think it is safe to say that by the time we reach even 20-30 years old, we have had some not so good times happen. If I listed all of mine, well it would be a tad longer than the novel Moby Dick. For today I am going to reminisce on one.

First I have to admit as the bad moments seem to engulf my life, there is absolutely no one or any way I can think of, see, or believe that there is anything good from it.

Life is like pebbles on the shore, some pretty some jaded

It may take years or decades to even have the courage to look at those times from afar. However, personally, I have been able to see the whole picture the further and further away I get from it.

There are times I do not know the whole picture, components I should not know, will never know, and that too is intended to be. Sometimes I just have to step back and comfort my pain with, the thought there was a reason. No one has the answers, and none of us can know why God’s plan hurts at times.

This particular realization I am looking at today, it took me 40 + years to look in the tapestry of my life and see some light in the dark colors.

For the first 10 yrs of my life, my family continued to grow in numbers ( a new child every 1 1/2 to 2 yrs )and we lived in rental places. I had 4 yrs of life in an upper flat in Bridgeport Cn, that followed with 3 different home in the Skaneateles NY area.

Four months before I turned 10, my parents found and bought a home in Bayberry. This was such an amazing event, it was fairly new, in a suburban neighborhood, we could walk to school, to church and stores, we were safe playing kickball in the street, we had lots of other kids, places to ride our bikes for hours without ever leaving the community, a great place to raise children, and mom could be a stay at home mom, comfortable with the safety of her more dependent children as we frolicked outside like happy puppies.

And then 4 months into this life, we were blessed to be in , boom….  the month of my 10th birthday, our dad was in the hospital he had had a heart attack. Mom had told us when dad came home he would be in a wheelchair at least until he regained his strength, we knew life was going to be way different.

Well, he never left that hospital, my mom at that time was 9 months very pregnant with her 6th child. Mom went into labor on the night before dad was to come home, a neighbor took her to the hospital, and the next morning VERY early… dad had died and mom gave birth.

I gotta tell you that moment in our lives was hard to figure out the whys. It was a time when it would be easy to not believe in anything. We had the cutest new sister, and dad never came home to enjoy the new addition to our family. Plus our “stay at home mom,” could no longer be. Mom went to college got her bachelors degree as she worked as a teaching assistant during the day at the local school district. Pam and I ( 11 and 10) became the child care in the after school/ evening times.

For years it was not easy, but looking back now… had we not had that bought home, where would our family have ended up?  We owned no residence before that time, I think in the plan of life, coloring in the grays with brighter colors, the move to Bayberry was one of those times when the bad, really also was a blessing for our future after dads death.

We were safe, we had a precious bundle of joy to help ease the pain, we  had neighbors helping neighbors, people helped us without ever being asked, so even as heartwrenching, as deep the hurt was, as scary, and as dark as those moments were, we were in the best place considering the whole picture.

Once I really looked beyond the pain, I was reminded once again, that life was never meant to be easy, but life is a blessing every single day I see the sun rise and set.

Until later, my love to all… Cindy, alias  Mrs. Justa

 

Mrs Justa and Cheap is not always the way to go

PHEW…. I made a purchase a while back… it was chap – like maybe at the dollar store.

YES it was an EASY crossword puzzle book. I mean this baby was CHEAP…

So I set it in the basket with my puzzle books which is next to the toilet in my bathroom….

and one day thought –“Oh I think I want to do a crossword puzzle..” I saw this EASY book- and figured I could whip is through before I was done going to the bathroom…

So I put on a pair of glasses, grabbed a pen and book, sat down on the “throne” and tried to do one puzzle.

Well I gotta tell you .. DID I FEEL STUPID!!None of the clues even made sense, I did not know what the words even meant- let alone what they wanted me to put in the boxes… Now I am no whiz kid—but this was pathetic!

I thought—“Oh maybe this is just a bad one” … so I went to the next…again….  I might have known ONE clue…

It was asking for characters in books I never heard of, asking for things I thought someone made up. Finally I got to the point of tossing the book out and admitting to myself that I have totally lost it. Gone… my crossword days are over… woe is me….

I resorted for months to either the FIND THE WORD or the FILL IN books— until a couple week ago. End of December—stocking stuffers… a DELL Easy crossword book— Santa could bring me that !

As I carefully opened it last night—as I read the first clue—I was ecstatic!. I knew the word and what they wanted me to fill in… Oh this was good… yes… so I looked at the next clue—AGAIN I KNEW THE WORD !!!.

So the moral to my story—a lesson in life… is NEVER BUY A CHEAP crossword puzzle book—if it is not DELL- it may be one that was made elsewhere and the attempted to interpret it to English….

I am glad to say—I CAN DO EASY CROSSWORDS>>> you have no idea how relieved I was to learn – I HAVE NOT LOST IT. 

Now with a new found confidence- I am going to proceed to sorting the 2013 receipts for taxes—and maybe doing another puzzle…

Love to all, Mrs Justa Alias Cindy.

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Mrs. Justa and if ya can’t laugh at yourself…

I have been known to do some pretty unusual stuff, often it leads to me laughing at myself.

Like tonight…..

I was at the fitness room at work. I went to listen to my MP3 player but the battery was low…

but  ah-ha I thought… I have a smart phone and Pandora on it… I will just plug the ear buds into that and work out. AH HA came the second thought….I do not have a holder for the phone and the MP3 holder is too small…. hmmm what to do?

I figure out a plan… I will carefully pass the phone down under my shirt / ear buds in my ears… and than put the phone in the cup holder on the elliptical…that way the wires won’t be dangling  over my shirt-chancing my phone to go flying and possibly break. Now mind you.. I thought I was alone in the gym..

The gym is a nice size- and I like going down at the end of the day. SO I am on the elliptical on the back row

RIGHT HERE >>>>>>

I am slower moving the pedals, and maneuvering the phone down my shirt- kinda half lifting up my shirt and grabbing the phone with my left hand –when all of the sudden I hear a bathroom door open …The bathroom doors are down at the end of this room—in that alcove like area. So I panic…I move quickly to  get my shirt down and act like I am just working out. Well. as this guy walks by, I smile kinda… but I can hear the camera on my phone going off with each move..the phone got caught in my bra strap… so as I am leisurely smiling as I am  pumping the pedals.under my shirt I am taking pictures of my breast….as soon as the guy got out of the room- I finished the process of  situating my phone in the real cup holder…(instead of the cup of my bra)….and I deleted a lot of photos of my boob.!!…AS I did that I can not help but wonder if each photo had a flash going off under my shirt. HA HA…. I can not ask the guy if I ever see him there again—but if there was—- I wonder what he was thinking.

I am still laughing… how “so CINDY”  this was…. I get myself in the strangest situations.

Hope you have a great night….. and a lesson to be learned…. do not try to put your phone down your shirt. HA HA>>>>> Love ya. Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and a unique situation at the family reunion

One of the things that the boys did was come over to our site and use sidewalk chalk and draw on our driveway. We moved our truck down to give them room and kind of create a boundary line form the park road.

They decided to draw emergency vehicles… the top big one is a police car, the middle was an ambulance and the bottom one became a fire truck.

a little later on I needed to move the truck back up in the driveway about 5 feet. Then I was going to go in the camper and get stuff ready for dinner . The boys wanted to join me. Being the truck is pretty high up in the air, I told the boys they had to get in the truck and I would move it. ( That way I did not have to worry they were in the driveway as I moved it.)

From LONG ago— if I had a kid in a vehicle, before I closed the door I would say—“Hands on heads” ( that way the fingers were not going to be in the door frame… ) So I had the boys pop up in the truck on the passengers side and I said “Hands on heads..” I saw they were both doing that and I closed the door. I moved quickly to the drivers side and opened the door…I had to laugh as Brandon said “ Gamma how long do we have to hold our heads?”

After taking the photo, I released them from position !!

Camping is a time to remember that you have places things go, and they need to get back in their place when you are done with them. You want to make sure what ever it is, that you have what you need and know where it is…

Like the shower stuff goes in a tote bag, you go to the shower, almost methodically take things out in a certain order, and put them back after. I was a little anal with the shower, wanting to make sure it was clean when I got in and clean for the next person. So on the tote bag, in a pocket was a spray bottle of Mr Clean and a squeegee. I really did not mind spraying it before and after, and felt that I was helping somewhat to make it more comfortable.

Now that I am on the other side of this rather weird experience… I can laugh …so here goes…..  on Weds….it was hot and humid, so I decided to wear capri pants that day. Well I  wanted to get my A.M shower and thought that I should shave my legs, so I  made sure I packed the razor—along with all the other stuff… I went over and cleaned the shower, turned on the HOT water..ahhh…. got the razor out and went about my business, when all of the sudden I felt a stinging… I cut my leg !! ( I had not done that since I was 13 !!!) So here I am… all I have is my soap, a scrunggie, shampoo, Mr Clean, clean clothes, my dirty clothes, a white towel and a squeegee. So I am frantically spraying the shower , trying to hold my leg up in mid air and press on the area, as hot water is pouring down on me, wondering how the heck I am going to get from the shower to the camper. I still had to wash my hair—so I did that on one leg- the other kinda swinging back and forth in the air, my body swaying with it…. occasionally needing to grip the wall and I am envisioning me totally loosing my balance and falling out of the shower with my less than taut wet body slapping on the floor..and who knows who would be standing there looking at me… fortunately that did not happen- . But I was still in a predicament – see if I lowered my leg it was going to bleed- so I am trying to maneuver around in this rather precarious position. I knew no one in there..and was thinking ( my mind was like a slot machine –tick tick ticking..) I am looking at my clothes, my white towel and finally came up with tying my slightly used underwear around my leg like a tourniquet and hobbling back to the camper.  I was relieved to see I had not brought my capris there—for the underwear would have been showing as it soaked up the blood… as I walked back. It was a definite Girl Scout move !!.   I slowly dried off my body, quickly towel dried my hair, did the Mr Clean squeegee process—all as I wobbled on one leg…. then back to the camper.. Oh I can assure you that I carefully stepped ..as I did not my make shift tourniquet to fall off on the pathway… I got in the camper—and put on a rather tight band aid, shared my experience with Mark… and chuckled at the what could have beens as I rinsed out the blood…

Looking at my leg today- I am amazed my process kept it from bleeding—I did not nick it.. I skinned it about 1 1/2 inches long !!. dang !! No wonder it stung… HA.. the joys if improvising..the joys of camping…I love camping… but think my bath bag will now include band aids.. LOL.. Have a great night..more family reunion thoughts to come again soon… Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and life’s not so fun..sometimes embarrassing moments

Today, just now…I was reminded of things in life that just are not so much fun…and at times pretty darn embarrassing. What prompted my mind to spin on this was a cold day, a hot shower, a ceiling vent sucking out the hot moist air, wet hair, wet body and my towel still across the bathroom on the towel rack. I wonder why -in this situation , the towel rack feels like it is 50 feet away, down a blustery highway….. See in the winter, I am one who carefully takes the towel from the outside of the sliding shower door, closes the sliding shower door and dries off in the shower. It is much warmer. But just now, it felt like I had to walk to the other end of town to get my towel…

Than…I am all dried off and dressed, I am doing my hair, and I look at my lip….I am reminded of yesterday. We were grocery shopping and I put the list between my lips for one second..and it STUCK on my lower lip. Now I am not referring to lightly laying on it..it was like immediately they became one. I had to literally peel the list off my lip, and the list took possession of the first layer of skin.. Dang …

As I am thinking about my stinging lip, I notice yet another thing that has been rather embarrassing at times in my life.clothes on inside out…why you ask… because I am standing in the bathroom , blowing my hair dry..and realize my shirt is on inside out.. So my mind drifted to another time or two when that happened. And the other times I did not find out until I have been in a zillion places, and wondered who noticed my clothes inside out…

That brought me into another ( of a long list of moments that I laughed about afterwards..) We ( Jeff and I were shopping at Ames ..( sniff sniff … a favorite department store that closed and I still miss it terribly) Jeff was about waist height to me… so maybe 6 or 7. We had gone on a few errands.. me and him in tow… we were at the checkout line… he behind me… All of the sudden, so innocently ..he says.. “ Mom I like your polka dot underwear.”  I thought that was a strange comment to make at that moment… and than I thought.. hmmm I think I have them on now… how would he know… So I asked him in the inquisicle way a mom would do… I said something like… “Thanks Jeff, but what made you think of that right now?” He looked up, and so sweetly said, “Because I am looking at them right now, and they look nice……”  I look down..and only than realized my white sweat pants were see through !!!.  HA I could not get out of there quick enough/..and than I did the rewind life mode…thinking of all the places we had been in my see through pants…

Yeah… life is fun, and life is interesting..and it is funny that moments like these—they live in the forefront of my mind. SO the motto for today… I always have a sense of humor..cuz embarrassing things happen. so smile…. and let those moment roll off your back. Love to all, Mrs Justa..alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and remembering let downs

Who do you trust, who do you not trust? What can you believe, what can you not believe.

I was on facebook the other day and there was a picture of a guy who was holding up a winning lottery ticket. It was the gigunda one…400 million or some unbelievable amount. Well on it he had a message saying he was going to give 1 million dollars to a random person.

People responded to him, blessed him, I too joined in with a word of support… low and behold it was a prank. I felt embarrassed, I felt naïve, I felt foolish…. but at least it was not just me who was rolled over by the guy… thousands of people liked him, commented, blessed him… and he set us up.

I want to believe people are good, I give people the benefit of the doubt, I work to find the good in people … and poof….someone let’s me down.

I remember with a job I had many many moons ago…. I totally loved the job. The manager told us what a great group we were, we were praised for our efficiency, I had part of my day when I worked on a print cutter , it cut the people’s  negatives and prints at the same time. I learned how to get it to work beyond its settings, by clicking certain switches I bypassed stops… I remember the manager telling me that Kodak was going to send a group of people there to see me run this print cutter. I totally LOVED coming to work. I trusted my boss, trusted the corporation…and than one day poof… the dreaded words… we were closing, relocating to another state.

Trusting people who make promises to you… that always hurts too. The world is filled with promise breakers. People who promise to call you when your vehicle is ready, people who promise a product is great and as you are taking it out of the package it breaks… people who promise to meet you at a certain time..and no show… people who promise to love you forever..only to one day say they never loved you…..

I have learned from these situations, from these people to carefully say my words… never promise something I can not provide, ..when I say I love you..I mean it…and when I promise to be there forever..I will be.

What you see is what you get..I will not pretend to be something I am not ( LIKE THE CREEP ON FACEBOOK) … We need to all work on being real,,, telling it like it is…. and not trying to bring false threats or false hopes to others.

I hope as the holiday season fills you with real things, no fake promises, no heart break, no disappointments. Love to all, Mrs Justa alais Cindy

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Mrs. Justa and the election…

I for one will be glad when the election is done. I am so sick of the accusations, the blindness, the short term memory people, people who can not remember the promises made 4 yrs ago, and where we are today.

I am floored that the pollsters are saying it is a tie…. I am floored so many in my family are blind to the reality. It is like everyone is drinking koolaid. I am just in shock.

I truly believe if we continue another 4 yrs on this path..we are in deep trouble. Our children and our grandchildren need a future other than one of socialism and debt.

I do not know if Gov. Romney is the be all end all..but I believe he deserves a chance to help us. I believe he TRULY is compassionate for this country and the people in it. I believe he means well….

As  I think of these past 4 yrs, of our President apologizing more than once to the mid eastern countries for America, I am embarrassed….. I look at the recent terrorist attack in Bengazi and our president, Secretary of State and UN rep all going on about a YouTube video was why it happened.. and apologizing for it!!! And I am amazed how left sided the media is. I am amazed that there is not more across the media of the attack in Bengazi… heck if a republican had been in ofc and that happened ( which it would not have..had a republican been in office) that president would have been smeared and probably charged with treason…impeachment…

I am totally disappointed in the whole thing. People called for help… our leaders in the  country ignored the pleas… well not all the country ignored the pleas… one brave man went and sacrificed his life for his country.

I am disappointed that people are not demanding to see what the implications of Health Care Reform has already been and will be….

I am flabbergasted that no one is bringing up all the wasted government spending..the printing of $$….having the president and his family take separate jets to the same destination for vacation hours apart… how the president chose to go to the NJ shore for Hurricane Sandy because of the political implications from h m doing it…. –but was not as eager to appear in the other natural disaster areas… How it seems that people’s suffering will be addressed IF there is political gain from it.

Or how there is booing of God… taking God out of the pledge…

IT IS NOT OKAY>>>>>

We …as a country ..gave this man a chance… and he has proven he knows how to campaign—as he has been going going going since his last election— campaigning… but not being presidential. Oh he is a smooth talker..( as long as he has a tele-prompter) ….  but he has not led the country. People are suffering and he is on Jay Leno… the View….insulting peoples intelligence with tactics….

I am so disappointed in the people who are turning the other cheek multiple times, those ignoring the fact that the president has been a divider more than a person bringing the country together. HIs comment the other day ( yesterday maybe) about “don’t boo…. Vote…voting is the best revenge” Are ya kidding me??? REVENGE>>>> No damn it… the reason to vote is for the best chance as a country we have to move forward..not because you wanna act revengefully. AHHH>>>>> HE had his chance..he failed….

I hope that people stop… look… listen…and not get sucked up to the few hours the president actually paid attention to the country and joined hands with the governor of NJ>>>>   please vote for the future… PLEASE>>>> thanks Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and the Olympic moves

Whoa, we had a great weekend. But I gotta admit I started it out definitely in the spirit of the Olympics. LMAO.

Ok.. I am not the most svelte person on earth.. Actually I am probably the furthest from it. Saturday morning EARLY we needed to walk Riley. So I got my shower at about 6:15 and had Riley hooked up and ready for the early morning, dew on the grass walk..the one where I tell her a zillion times to go potty.. ( like she is going to go on command) ..as we were heading to Cracker Barrel for our traditional Saturday morning breakfast with our friends.

Well… I stepped down off our front steps..looking at the leash and totally ignoring the new asphalt sidewalk.and the ground next to it that was dug out and now created a “V” shape… and I stepped in the V and somehow became an Olympic Gymnast wanna be in a split second.

Oh yeah…. kinda like the feeling when you are doing gym class and having to do those run and leap stunts on the mat…but I had no mat… I am not fit and trim…and I have not been in a gym class like that for 43 years ….. One second I am walking..the next I am flying in the air.. Somehow I was able to float a bit… twist to the left ( as to avoid the asphalt) ….landing on my left side..dew splashing up in the air.. leash TIGHT in hand…as I hit the grass I did a roll to the left…ending up on my back..staring at what would have been the early morning sky..had it not been for Riley licking my face and staring at me…

I remember that first moment of realizing I was lying in the grass… it was one of those moments when ya slowly move this and that making sure everything is still attached to where it needed to be…. once that is assured..than wondering who the heck just saw this very athletic maneuver…and than having the realization that I had to get up off the ground… I did get up..brushed myself off..walked the dog..she did both—– I think I scared the poop out of her…

I felt lucky… UNTIL SUNDAY MORNING>>>>when I came to realize the 24 hrs after an accident pain… Oh yeah…. the mid Right back area…on the right…oooo hurts to twist…. hurts to bend… dang hurts to lift my leg too high… GRRRRR> So I told the boys they had to help me… for Preston if a diaper needed changing it was being done on the higher bed in the house…. no lifting the boys… but I could sit with them .

Today..at work the pain was around an 8..in the kidney area..so I went to the docs. Wanted to make sure it was not a coincidence and the pain was not from my Olympic moves..but kidney related… So I was sent in to leave a urine sample… Now 2 hrs prior to this appnt—I had taken B6 and Magnesium..so I pee in the sterile cup..put the cap on it..set it on the table in the bathroom..and realize my pee is dayglow lime green yellow !!!! All the other folks urine was darkish yellow..not mine—it looked like it was some sort of glow in the dark liquid.. CAN YOU SAY EMBARRASSED !!!!. No one said anything to me… but I was chuckling to myself at the difference between mine and the other 3 …. bet they wear protective gear when they culture mine..like it is a nuclear substance or something.

So heat, try some stuff at the gym tomorrow, Motrin, and time…. THANK GOD my kidneys are looking okay!.

I am off to take a hot shower and put some of that romantic smelling Ben Gay LMAO…. on my soft tissue area that hurts… and head off to bed….

Tomorrow is going to be here before I know it…… I need to get in there early… Love to all.. Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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Mrs Justa and the family reunion

Family reunions… they are neat to have. Our family is pretty large, and unfortunately not many could attend, but those who did, I am thankful for the time with them. It was the first year my oldest brother Don and his wife Sally could not attend. That was weird. They are the rock for the reunion. Sally loves to plan it and organize it, and that component was missing this time around. Don LOVES the kids… and the kids who are now adults with kids of their own. They are very wise and giving of themselves people, they are real people..not pretend. They were missed.

It is strange but even family who live within a 20 mile radius of each other here in the Syracuse area—we do not spend nearly enough time together, so it was good to have quality time with them too. I felt bad for my nephew—who has 4 siblings, and none were there. His mom and step dad were there though and his kids got to spend time with their grandparents.

My brother, his wife, Mark and me, our new dog Riley Regan, my sister and her 2 kids , my nephew , his wife and 2 kids, and another sister and her husband were there. It was a hot humid few days. A few of us had campers with AC- and that was great for Riley, and the grandkids and their parents…—Riley  was not feeling 100%, so the cooler temps were good for her too. . Our nights were more comfortable than they had been in years passed when we had a pop up without AC, and when we were tenting.

I was over at Jeff and Amanda’s one night as the fire flies were darting back and forth. Brandon was trying to figure out what they were. So Jeff caught one in his hands and let Brandon peak inside and see the fly light up… it was magical, it was heart warming , it was wonderful to see the wonder and excitement in Brandon’s face..and the love in Jeff’s face as he was explaining to Jeff what these lights were.

This is living..this is what life is about. Not the DVDs, or the Nike at nite channels.. no nature, parents, kids, spending time with one another ant not I phones, computers, I pads.

Taking the nap under the tree,

playing with bubbles.

 

 

playing cards at a picnic table

 

 

 

 

 

having the grandkids help walk the dog…

 

 

Having a grand child help with the dishes….

 

 

Just enjoying each moment. Now it will be another year before we all come together.

That is a long time. We are hoping all can come next year… each person not there was missed terribly.

I am thankful we were able to share the 5 days though with all who could come for all or part of it.

I love my family… I love my husband who came into my family through marriage and shares in this annual event ! I feel truly blessed.

Love to all.. Mrs Justa alias, Cindy

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Mrs Justa and Riley Regan Krusen and life

Riley has a middle name of Regan..kind of has a ring to it, doesn’t it?  We saw a license plate with Regan on it..and poof—she now has a middle name.

This is day 3 of Riley and us—and well it is going okay. The first day she was super logy—but she had just had major surgery less than 24 hrs prior. Her stools were like a garden hose was spraying out of her butt..but as the days have passed..that problem has disappeared. Even when she had explosive diarrhea she did not have any accidents in the house.

She has this kinda cute whimper that she occasionally does if she feels she was left behind. It was funny this morning. We had a guy coming over at 9 to seal the driveway. Mark had gone out to talk to the guy, and Riley thought she was alone. She did this whisper whimper.. kinda like she was singing the blues..I came out of the bedroom and said” Riley..what is wrong?” Immediately she stopped and came over. I think she was embarrassed

She has not given us a definite signal when she wants to go out.. one time she came to the recliner Mark was in and stared at him. I was in the kitchen doing stuff and she came in and shook her head so her license and ID tag jingled. Once she came into the kitchen and did a couple whimpers.

She is funny—If I take her for a walk—she needs to sleep for a few hrs.… if she gets up and walks around—she has to sleep for a few hrs. She reminds me of when I had surgery—for weeks I would get up and do something and need to sleep for 3 hrs.. that went on for weeks….

The crate…Riley and crate do not belong in the same county—she slept in it..but not until she whimpered and did a beagle howl… we are wondering if she spent a lot of time in a crate in her past life? The second night she whimpered and got sick… so the crate is on the not so good idea list right now.

She does not seem to be a darter when the front door is opened… Mark and I are really careful that she does not get out. I want to understand her past… but maybe I don’t. It is kinda sad—when you call her she puts her head down ( like EEORE from Winnie the POOH) and she does a belly crawl-as if to show she is afraid to come close.  Than when she gets to you, her shoulders are hunched..her head low… and she pushes against your leg… we are working to tell her she is a good girl. I wonder if they yelled at her a lot? We are looking forward to her meeting the family…and I am very thankful we ended up with her at home and not camping this weekend—we all needed time to relate… I am going to be off line for a few days… but hang in there.. I will be back on Sunday!!!. Love to all…. (and be patient…there will be more new “baby” pictures for a bit )mrs Justa alias Cindy

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