So today my mind is opening up cubbies holes of long ago. It was triggered by, yes, another hour of driving back and forth to work..and a thought got in my mind—and it stuck there.

As this thought stuck in my mind- the tangled  cob webs started to sway…, and those tightly closed doors of yesteryear started to creak open. Hmm. what made me think of the thought—why nothing short of the radio . There was a commercial—and in it the guy was talking about financial planning—and he said “Have you ever been lost?” …I can not tell you the rest of the commercial—because I got stuck in the question.

Have I ever been lost??? Well yeah … quite a few times in my life. Than add have you ever felt lost??Well I could write for years on that.

So as the doors open, and feelings of 100_3078being lost come to life again—I remember that scared feeling, that feeling of anxiety, of feeling like I wanted to just click my heels and go back to where I was not lost. Being lost is scary to me… it is a feeling of weakness, a feeling of despair.A feeling like I just want to crawl under a cover and hide—hoping for someone to find me. 

I remember in the early years of my life getting lost at a store. One moment my mom was there, and the next..she disappeared—poof..gone. I remember being short enough that all I could see was people’s feet and butts.. I remember looking straight up and faces.. ( and looking at faces from the floor upwards—well they look a little weird. The chin  is prominent-followed by some curves and than 2 dark little holes called nostrils. Everyone looked weird, and I remember calling out “mom!!!!’ I remember my legs feeling shaky, and feeling embarrassed as I started to cry. I am calling for my mom, and these people around me are now looking down at me from way above.

Finally someone came and told me they worked in the store, and took my hand and they called for my mom over the intercom, when I saw her—it was like when Miss Piggy and Kermit the frog saw each other and ran  towards one another in slow motion… …( Thanks google clip art  and cineplex . com for this image !!)

Ugg.. feeling lost is a horrible feeling. We can feel lost in life, lost in public, lost in misfortune… this could go on for some time in days to come.

Somehow we need a proverbial life compass to keep us on track… and if I see you..lost… I will help you find the path….Just like that woman in the store did for me.

Love to all, Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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