I have been really going strongCaleb, Mackenzie, Rochester, Sept 30 2011 044 this week.  We had a recertification reviewer at work, and what that basically means, is the person who comes looks at everything we do with a fine tooth comb. Now the anxiety knowing they are coming is enough to age a person a few years, and than the first day they are there… well knots in the stomach would be a welcome feeling—the angst is more like ship anchors in the gut.

I know we know what we are doing, and I know every single person is professional and excellent at what they do… but it is the thought of being examined ..what if a rule changed and we were un aware… what if there is one time something might have been done incorrectly… uggg… the stress is beyond belief.

So here I am, yesterday… day 2… knowing I am on her agenda to be there with her for 4-5 hours!!!! ,to answer a zillion questions, and not let her know that the anxiety and stress would make it so easy to  puke all over her without too much trouble…. she was a nice enough lady, very professional, very non-smiley( and for me that is tough,cuz when people are stern and without a sense of humor… it makes me laugh..I have a really hard time being serious when someone looks like they just drank caster-oil.  Than I get nervous, what if I say the wrong thing, what if I can not produce the answer, what if… than my nerves get me silly, I feel myself straining to keep my lips normal..cuz they want to pop into a smile…. and than I say thing to try to calm the air, I speak softly, calming in my tone, and my insides are screaming and stretched to the max… 2 LONG days…and in the end..the department I manage… we did what we do every day.. we all follow the rules, we handle the cases in a timely manner, and we are professional. We were interviewed, we were questioned, we were observed….

outer banksAs I drove in today… rehashing Tues and Weds in my poor worn out brain, I was wondering about that very first moment a new president has when they hear the door to the White House close and they are in there… the first minute of being President of the United States. Holy crap… would probably be my first thought.. and “What the Hell was I thinking ?” might be the next thought. I would feel as overwhelmed by that responsibility as the ocean makes me feel insignificant…

At work we have an orientor who carefully watches and coaches a new employee through the various steps….but what about at the White House???? As that big heavy door closes… is there an orientor waiting..? They are under the evil eye of millions of inspectors for the next  4-8 YEARS! If they do anything the world knows. Is there a manual that is written and updated… “The President of the USA Handbook?”  Is there someone that the new president can watch and be led baby steps into their new role? And this is a job you can not get fed up with and resign in a moments notice. Plus people make money criticizing you and mocking you. Depending on the party in the White House- will depend which station will mock and criticize you.

As I sit here… there is the last of the Republican Debates for a while playing in the other room, and I wonder what inspired these folks to step into the political boxing ring… what each of them would be like the time that big door of the White House closed behind them I am hoping one of them get that experience, as I am really worried about the current state of the country. The current administration has never stopped campaigning, has not been like a leader, seems really slithery, and has no respect for the $$ of the tax payers or the need for work in this country. We need someone who care in the office… and I am glad I was never in a position where I would have been that person.

So I am off… to unwind a bit from a very very stressful ( self induced stress..but still stress) week… get ready for tomorrow… and I will be back.. Live life to the fullest, keep your head high, and be proud of who you are… Love Mrs Justa alias Cindy

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